the bi entry (for str8 and gays to read)

A girl I know dumped her bf and was now dating one of my friends who is a girl. We though it was her "biggest revenge ever" cuz ppl would be talking about him turning a girl gay, but one of my friends (female) said "I would never kiss a girl, no matter what". It's the first time I've actually heard a girl said she is disgusted by another girl. Are 100% str8 ppl real? According to Kinsey, not many people said they were in his studies...

Comments

Kinsey had one thing that he did, that he shouldn't have done: tried lumping everything together. I've said it before: sexuality has two components; preference and orientation. You can be 100% straight in orientation, and bi in preference. Orientation is what you can see yourself having a sustained relationship with, can fall in love with, etc. Preference is what gets you going and what gets you off. So, yes, there are 100% straight people, and there are 100%/50% people, it just depends on what gets you off.

I say that Kinsey made a mistake because, if it were that 100%/100% guys were around, they'd only watch lesbian porn. There would be no "str8" porn since there would be no need to see a penis. That's why, if you notice, the guys in straight porn are decent looking. That's because the guys watching notice that, too. Regardless of public admission, we all look and pay attention.
 
Sensible answer. I guess nothing is black and white. I totally get a point I hadn't. You're one keen guy to have around.
 
I agree with horsehung86 - there's sexual attraction (what gets you off) and romantic/emotional attraction and the two can be quite different. I think that the way this site and others list sexual orientation is oversimplified because it implies that if you increase your "gay" attraction, you automatically decrease your "straight" attraction. In the real world, the two can change independently of one another.

For me, I was 100% gay/0% straight for most of my life, but then my straight percentage started creeping up to around 40%, where it is now; however, my gay percentage is still 100% - no change at all. So what this means is that while I can perform sexually with women and I do enjoy it, it's not something I'm really motivated to seek out (although I won't say no if it's offered!); at the same time, I'm highly motivated to seek out men (read "constantly horny for guys"), and I'm interested in more than just sex, I want a relationship too - something I just don't see happening with a woman.

I'm not sure any of the traditional labels really fit me: It doesn't feel right to call myself "gay" because I do enjoy women on occasion, but at the same time, I don't consider myself "bi" because I really don't seek it out and I have no interest in a relationship (beyond friendship) with a woman. Because of this, I generally avoid labels, or I only use them as a form of shorthand depending on the context.

Personally, I feel that sites like this should let you choose your percentages for gay and straight separately, i.e. 100% gay/40% straight, rather than making it an either/or choice. And that was pretty much Kinsey's flaw too.
 
Orientation and preference are NOT defined the way you suggest. The term "preference" is an older term in psychology; "orientation" was created to replace it because it more strongly suggests that your sexual desires are biological, not chosen.
 
I chose to gloss over the inaccurate terminology because the point HH86 made is valid: What arouses you physically and what attracts you emotionally/romantically can be and often are two different things. So as he said, you can be turned on by both men and women, but only drawn to a relationship with one or the other. (I'm a good example of that.) I would add that in both cases, the attraction has its origins in biology, but societal pressures can certainly influence whether or not you act on those attractions.