Ugh. What a fucking night. I'm hoping that writing about this will help me get over it and not let him affect my feelings.
Long story, short. "A" is someone I used to work with. We used to fool around, and by fool around, I mean I'd blow him and he'd finger bang me. He has a great cock and knows how to get me off really well.
Two years ago when this was going on, I had started to see someone else and told "A" that we couldn't fool around like this anymore. What did he do ? He kissed me. He broke our rules. My rule was no P in V sex, his rule was no kissing. I think that was just to keep it casual and not let intimacy into what we were doing. I got pissed off that he was trying to manipulate me. He knows I love kissing, and when the thought of me not blowing him anymore upset him, he pulled a dirty trick out and kissed me. I called him on it. Told him he was manipulating me and that he was wrong. If he didn't want anyone else dating me, he should have dated me. He said the meanest things anyone has ever said to me. So there is the verbal and emotional abuse.
Then, after the last time I saw him, I realized I'd left my necklace at his house. I called him and asked him to meet me outside so I could retrieve it. I tried to take the necklace back and he in later texts revealed that he thought I was playing hard to get. He tried to pull me in his house, he was groping me in his front yard, I kept saying no. When I got the necklace in my hands, he grabbed me by the thumb, yanking it back and tried to pull me into his house. I screamed as loud as I could and bit him as hard as my jaws would allow. He let go, and I ran to my car and sped off. That was the last time I'd seen him.
I received a barrage of texts that were some what apologetic and proved that he was really clueless as to him having done anything wrong.
Blah blah fucking blah.
This girl I work with "C" brought him into the restaurant tonight. When I saw him sit down, I wanted to vomit. I almost collapsed, as my knees had turned to jelly. I couldn't believe it. Of course, I'd never shared what had happened between him and myself. We had worked together, he had a reputation at work, and it was really no one's business.
I avoided him all night.
A coworker of mine took me out for a drink after, I had explained to him what happened, he hugged me and we talked about it a little bit.
I'm just so upset that it affected me like it did. I honestly never thought I'd see him again. He called and texted me for six months after wards, and I never responded. He said he would never hurt a woman *well, he did* and there was no way in Hell I was ever going to trust him again.
I still feel sick to my stomach and I know people are going to be talking about it tomorrow at work, *C* in particular is going to want to know why I didn't come over and say hi. And I just want these icky feelings inside to go away. I didn't expect to react the way I did. I never even thought about seeing him again. And still, some little part of me wants him to beg for my forgiveness. It won't happen. I feel like a mess =/
Long story, short. "A" is someone I used to work with. We used to fool around, and by fool around, I mean I'd blow him and he'd finger bang me. He has a great cock and knows how to get me off really well.
Two years ago when this was going on, I had started to see someone else and told "A" that we couldn't fool around like this anymore. What did he do ? He kissed me. He broke our rules. My rule was no P in V sex, his rule was no kissing. I think that was just to keep it casual and not let intimacy into what we were doing. I got pissed off that he was trying to manipulate me. He knows I love kissing, and when the thought of me not blowing him anymore upset him, he pulled a dirty trick out and kissed me. I called him on it. Told him he was manipulating me and that he was wrong. If he didn't want anyone else dating me, he should have dated me. He said the meanest things anyone has ever said to me. So there is the verbal and emotional abuse.
Then, after the last time I saw him, I realized I'd left my necklace at his house. I called him and asked him to meet me outside so I could retrieve it. I tried to take the necklace back and he in later texts revealed that he thought I was playing hard to get. He tried to pull me in his house, he was groping me in his front yard, I kept saying no. When I got the necklace in my hands, he grabbed me by the thumb, yanking it back and tried to pull me into his house. I screamed as loud as I could and bit him as hard as my jaws would allow. He let go, and I ran to my car and sped off. That was the last time I'd seen him.
I received a barrage of texts that were some what apologetic and proved that he was really clueless as to him having done anything wrong.
Blah blah fucking blah.
This girl I work with "C" brought him into the restaurant tonight. When I saw him sit down, I wanted to vomit. I almost collapsed, as my knees had turned to jelly. I couldn't believe it. Of course, I'd never shared what had happened between him and myself. We had worked together, he had a reputation at work, and it was really no one's business.
I avoided him all night.
A coworker of mine took me out for a drink after, I had explained to him what happened, he hugged me and we talked about it a little bit.
I'm just so upset that it affected me like it did. I honestly never thought I'd see him again. He called and texted me for six months after wards, and I never responded. He said he would never hurt a woman *well, he did* and there was no way in Hell I was ever going to trust him again.
I still feel sick to my stomach and I know people are going to be talking about it tomorrow at work, *C* in particular is going to want to know why I didn't come over and say hi. And I just want these icky feelings inside to go away. I didn't expect to react the way I did. I never even thought about seeing him again. And still, some little part of me wants him to beg for my forgiveness. It won't happen. I feel like a mess =/
