Web Love Requires Caution

This is not news to me. I can't believe they had to do a study to find out people lie about their appearance on dating web sites.:tongue::rolleyes:

Web Love Requires Caution

By: Psych Central Senior News Editor
on Tuesday, Feb, 6, 2007

Reviewed by: John M. Grohol, Psy.D.
on February 6, 2007 at 10:16 am


New research suggests online daters, both men and women, usually misrepresent either their height or weight and sometimes their age.

The finding by a Cornell University communication researcher implies that the deception is a strategic maneuver to improve success at “finding love”.

The study will be published in an upcoming Proceedings of Computer/Human Interaction (April 2007), an annual peer-reviewed journal, to be released this spring.

Using a new method that measured the actual difference between profile information and reality, the study revealed that men systematically overestimated their height, while women more commonly underestimated their weight, said Jeffrey Hancock, an assistant professor of communication and the lead author on this study.

“Surprisingly, age-related deception was minimal and did not differ by gender,” he said.

About 52.6 percent of the men in the study lied about their height, as did 39 percent of the women. Slightly more women lied about their weight (64.1 percent) than did men (60.5 percent). When it came to age, 24.3 percent of the men were untruthful, compared with 13.1 percent of the women.

Researchers evaluated four popular dating Web sites, where users create their own profiles and initiate contact with others: Match.com, Yahoo Personals, American Singles and Webdate.

Study participants — users of these Web sites — were recruited in New York City through advertisements in the Village Voice and Craigslist.com. The final sample included 80 participants, equally divided between genders.

After collecting information about the participants from their online profiles, the researchers measured each person’s height and weight, and obtained their age from drivers’ licenses.

What constituted a lie? For height, the discrepancy had to be greater than half an inch; for weight, the deviation had to be greater than five pounds; and for age, there had to be a difference of a year.

The results: A higher percentage of participants lied about their weight than either their height or age. In fact, for almost two thirds of the participants, weight was incorrect by 5 pounds or more.

Hancock says that social research abounds on how men and women use different strategies for finding love. In general, men seek youth and physical attractiveness in a partner, while women look for the ability to provide as well as indicators of social status, such as level of education and career.

The pattern of lies — frequent but slight — suggest that deception in online dating profiles is strategic. “Participants balanced the tension between appearing as attractive as possible, while also being perceived as honest,” Hancock said.

Since the study was completed, online dating sites have changed. They now inquire about general body types rather than request information on a person’s specific weight, but the basic tension of trying to appear as attractive as possible without having a deception detected still applies, he said.

Source: Cornell University

Comments

Newsflash? Not so much. I had to tell a friends young sister this is NOT advisable. The young lady I am referring to was 15, her lover online was 16. IRL he turned out to be 28. He got his though.
 
I am truly happy (& a little jealous) you and Miss Bliss hooked up. :smile: Though I'm a little miffed there won't be any babies . . . yet. :wink: When is your next visit to Philly? :tongue::wink:

Call me jaded but in most cases I think Osiris is correct.
 
erm.... DUH! there appears to be higher percentages due to the web, but in reality people have been doing it for eons.
caution before trust is a good modus operandi.
oh well. and yeah, some do get lucky. :tongue:
I think NoS and Bliss are a cosmic connection... other more spiritual influences had a part I think. I am happy for them.:smile:
 
Well of course No_Strings (or should we call him Strung on Bliss?) and Mercurialbliss are the exception to that rule and honestly? I am glad they defy the odds and have each other. I smile every time I see their avatars. They should really turn it into a movie.
 
I'm constantly surprised at how much support we receive, from family, friends and acquaintances. I truly means a lot y'all, I suppose I should be to blame for underestimating everyone. I've yet to hear a single cynical or skeptical word on the matter.

I am truly happy (& a little jealous) you and Miss Bliss hooked up. Though I'm a little miffed there won't be any babies . . . yet. When is your next visit to Philly?
Babies? My balls might not work, give us some time! And who says the next time I'm in Philly that it will be merely a visit at all? :wink:

I think NoS and Bliss are a cosmic connection... other more spiritual influences had a part I think. I am happy for them.
:redface:You know that means a lot to me coming from you, and similarly I'm over the moon for your situation. Remind me to PM you sometime, sweetie. :smile:

Well of course No_Strings (or should we call him Strung on Bliss?) and Mercurialbliss are the exception to that rule and honestly? I am glad they defy the odds and have each other. I smile every time I see their avatars. They should really turn it into a movie.
You're a truly sweet man Osiris. One can tell from your comments that you're no stranger to love and you can see it where it resides. Yes, I no longer have(or desire) No Strings Attached - watch this space. :tongue:
 
Strung_On_Bliss said:
I'm constantly surprised at how much support we receive, from family, friends and acquaintances. I truly means a lot y'all, I suppose I should be to blame for underestimating everyone. I've yet to hear a single cynical or skeptical word on the matter.

You shouldn't be. You reap what you sow. The two of you are wonderful and treat people with respect and decency. How can we NOT love you two?
 
Hold on,hold on, you do know that, I met Mr. Ed online? I think you have to be scrupulously honest, and weigh the accumulated baggage, to see if that person is a viable candidate for you. I also met my second husband online,and I knew that he had more baggage, than I cared to carry!
I went to counseling with him,but he was never honest about his feelings,which I think has everything to do with his "upbringing",if you can call it that.
None of which has much to do with "strung on Bliss". They are great folks and I'm sure you'll be as happy as Osiris and Ed and I are. NJQT, I'm still looking for someone for you,how bout one of my cousins? I think I'm ramblin'!
cigarbabe:saevilw:
 
:redface:You know that means a lot to me coming from you, and similarly I'm over the moon for your situation. Remind me to PM you sometime, sweetie. :smile:

thank you. :kiss: You mean a lot to me- well, both of you do. I hope Mr Sassy and I will always be as happy as we are every second of every day.

but back on the OP, and babe's comment, many actually have been blessed, in fact lots here, obviously yours and my unexpected (well mine was!) situations included. babe and Mr babe Holly and Willy, and I am sure plenty others I don't know of.
It proves some people are certainly honest and it pays off in the best of ways for them. I don't believe in being too cynical, I believe in not looking or expecting, letting destiny take its course....and certainly I think I really can often discern the truth before making a mistake. tho not always :rolleyes: and sometimes, one can actually miss out by letting studies like this one cloud their own natural instincts too much.
ok. Now I'm rambling!
 
Me? Happy? Cigarbabe!?! You are ruining my image as a bastardly, bitter, wife beater wearing, beer swilling suburban ass.:biggrin1:

Seriously, she is right. You guys waited for the right place and time and when it's right, it's right. I proposed to my wife 3 weeks after we met. She said no and married the father of her first child. She divorced him, we dated a while, a year later I asked again. I got told no. I moved to San Francisco, had several meaningless "trophy" relationships. Went home for Thanksgiving 1999, asked again and she said yes. By New Years, she got cold feet. She married husband number two a year and a half later and I didn't talk to her for 3 years. I started talking to her again when she came to me and told me he was abusing (verbally) my godsons (her sons), and my future wife as well. She left him and came out to Seattle on vacation. I was seriously in love with someone else, or so I thought. Kris went home and sent me a letter telling me that my current would hurt me, she was right. three months later, I broke up with the girlfriend, I asked again and this time she not only said yes, she moved in. Boys and all and has been here ever since. We were civilly married as we have to wait for the annulment of her first two marriages. We are almost there and are waiting for the decision from the Judge Advocate and when we do, we will finally have our Big Obnoxious Catholic Wedding. Complete with drunken revelry, Irish drinking songs and some minor destruction to the golf course at the club.

By that time I hope several of you (and hopefully You NoS and Bliss) will be able to attend. NJQT and Naughty will most probably be scoping out my old frat brothers. if Meg comes, I have a friend in KC to escort her out. He is an attorney. Who knows? Six degrees of internet seperation could lead to love matches at a wedding in Woodinville. :wink:
 
I have met three men from online, in person. One was a complete dud, one was sugar daddy wannabe, and the other was a damn good fuckbuddy, but that's it. So I was just jaded enough when I joined LPSG about a year ago to view it only as entertainment and a cheap thrill.:tongue::redface:
I was probably here for 6 months before I realized that not just friendships, but real relationships, and lasting love could also be found here.:eek::cool:

Just when I had let my guard down and allowed the real me to show thru I found "The One." Sounds good right . . .it was until I found out he was the internet love version of Itzhak Perlman and he played me like a Stradivarius. So the walls are back up, and there they shall stay, until I meet a nice man the old fashioned way . . . face to face.
 
I've met a few people from online in real life. All women. One I lost my virginity to before she basically told me she used me for sex. One became my girlfriend for a few weeks until she revealed her obsessiveness and true motives for our relationship. She wanted a kid. The only person I met who didn't turn out to be something different was a girl who I met as a possible gf. We hung out a few times and saw that we weren't clicking on a romantic level but we did enjoy each other's company and views on life. We've been friends for a few years now.

In the end. It's all a crapshoot. Throw the dice and take a chance. Just be careful.
 
I've met a few folks online, my previous job working natural gas and oil pipelines offered a much better opportunity for me to do so. I have met guys and women, and haven't had a relationship with any of them, almost did with one of the women but she was the only one out of all that I have met that had lied and so nothing ever came of that, turned out she was married and not the single mother of two that she led me to believe.

However, I stand by this to this day, if you make friends online and get the chance to meet them, do it. I have had a blast with folks that I've met online and while there are nutty folks out there, you can't judge everyone by the acts of a few morons!
 
People on the net come a cropper because they don't apply the common sense they use in real life to their communications on the net. On the net people seem to swallow bullshit that would have them rolling on the floor in hysterical laughter if they heard them in the pub. If it sounds like a lie it usually is a lie.
 
Well I can hold my hands up high and say 'Yes' Ive fallen for the internet bullshit blag. I chatted to a guy for a while (5months), checked him out online (was he really a television script writer) etc etc. Yes all was correct... We finally decide to meet. Bearing in mind (yes fool that I was) I had seen a few head shots etc and at the time thought well ok, not out of this world but girl, give the guy some credit, he isnt a minger either. So off I trot to the centre of Manchester one very cold night when only polar bears would take a look.... off to the bar we arranged to meet outside. As I get nearer and nearer to the place, I cant see anyone who was remotely like him, in fact there was only one man outside, who and no offence to my ample bodied friends, was the size of the back of a bus.... Not taking any notice obviously, i arrived and stood there shivering from the cold. As I then heard my name said, my heart nearly jumped out of my chest as I turned around and whose face did I see on the big guy? Yep you got it in. In one.... Lesson learned. I ran from that bar quicker than a hooker who had just been paid too much for her services!!!!!
 
I think that internet dating was created by reality show creators. Internet dating is schadenfreude in the making.

 

Blog entry information

Author
Principessa
Read time
3 min read
Views
369
Comments
17
Last update

More entries from Principessa

Share this entry