- Joined
- Feb 24, 2008
- Posts
- 816
- Media
- 50
- Likes
- 1,417
- Points
- 248
- Age
- 49
- Location
- Tallahassee, Florida
- Sexuality
- 100% Gay, 0% Straight
- Gender
- Male
I work as a Medical Courier or Lab Guy, either is fine.
So the other day I'm riding along wonderfully to my next stop which is over 30 miles, so I have time to think. The podcasts I was listening to was boring and didn't care for the topic at hand. I started thinking about my age and I am 45 and I am saying to myself "You are going to be 50 in a few years " and I stopped... pondered the thought. Dang man, its crazy. I have been told that I don't look my age. Thank you to my extraordinary daily face cleaning routine and no facial hair(can't do the beard thing. will itch like I have fleas) I get pretty down on myself because I don't have friends or never been in a ltr or in love. I envy people who are in relationships and often wonder to myself-- How do they do it? They seem pretty normal, so am I. They must know something I don't. I try to study people and notice their interactions, body language and their hands in social situations. Try not to stare at long periods of time, fearing being called out and told to leave. Then the thoughts vanish and I am back to normal, my sense of normalcy anyway. I spend most of my time working or learning photography and reading and writing and cooking and scouring the internet..Pinterest and coming on this site to see what everyone else is doing or talking about. ( Some of you are entertaining. I Love it though) I'm introverted and while I go out. Truthfully, I am a little apprehensive around people. I used to be in therapy, but not now. Where's that time gone? I have to constantly tell myself that I need to be present and it's ok, you are you. I need an adventure. Who knows where the road may take me?
So the other day I'm riding along wonderfully to my next stop which is over 30 miles, so I have time to think. The podcasts I was listening to was boring and didn't care for the topic at hand. I started thinking about my age and I am 45 and I am saying to myself "You are going to be 50 in a few years " and I stopped... pondered the thought. Dang man, its crazy. I have been told that I don't look my age. Thank you to my extraordinary daily face cleaning routine and no facial hair(can't do the beard thing. will itch like I have fleas) I get pretty down on myself because I don't have friends or never been in a ltr or in love. I envy people who are in relationships and often wonder to myself-- How do they do it? They seem pretty normal, so am I. They must know something I don't. I try to study people and notice their interactions, body language and their hands in social situations. Try not to stare at long periods of time, fearing being called out and told to leave. Then the thoughts vanish and I am back to normal, my sense of normalcy anyway. I spend most of my time working or learning photography and reading and writing and cooking and scouring the internet..Pinterest and coming on this site to see what everyone else is doing or talking about. ( Some of you are entertaining. I Love it though) I'm introverted and while I go out. Truthfully, I am a little apprehensive around people. I used to be in therapy, but not now. Where's that time gone? I have to constantly tell myself that I need to be present and it's ok, you are you. I need an adventure. Who knows where the road may take me?
