Antipathy towards good looking Men

[deleted26388511]

So I‘m a gay leaning rather unattractive bi sexual past his prime and while I can get obsessed about good looking fit young men I also have that hatred towards them probably stemming from underlying jealousy and inferiority complex.
I want to have them but at the same time want to see everything bad happening to them.

Can anyone relate?

 

[deleted26388511]

Edit: Like I think it could be evolutionary also in a sense that they challaenge my pitiful masculinity with their very presence.

 

[marriedasian]

I would implore you to take some time and have some deep reflection on why you feel this way. It is very not normal. It's almost borderline envy, in my opinion.

Edit: Like I think it could be evolutionary also in a sense that they challaenge my pitiful masculinity with their very presence.

I don't think this is evolutionary in any way. Your statement is implying that your masculinity and their masculinity is in some sort of race when it may truly not be at all. Just because they are better looking than you doesn't mean you are less; it just means they're better looking, period, end-of-story, nothing else more.

You could very well be decent-looking but just not as good as them and this wouldn't equate to you being less. Lastly, being good-looking is not the end-all-be-all to life (same as having a big dick).

I think you may have some deep, emotional personal issues that needs to be worked out. I would recommend professional help to unpack all the baggage you may have been carrying for all this time.

Good luck. Other people's mere existence should not "challenge" who you are especially if their existence has little or no affect at all to your own very existence from an objective point of view.

 

[doidrici]

So I‘m a gay leaning rather unattractive bi sexual past his prime and while I can get obsessed about good looking fit young men I also have that hatred towards them probably stemming from underlying jealousy and inferiority complex.
I want to have them but at the same time want to see everything bad happening to them.

Can anyone relate?

Absolutely, buddy. The envy is 100% evolutionary and healthy (so long as it’s not destabilizing you). However if we’re gay or bi there’s an extra layer of sexual attraction so the whole deal becomes very ambivalent.

 

[Sagittarius84]

Definitely sounds like a gay specific thing...that's not to say that straight men do not experience envy, but that typically motivates self improvement to match or better the object of envy; if he's more handsome I've got to get more muscular, or richer, etc.. to simply ruminate upon your deficiency without acting to overcome or accept it sounds very unproductive to my male biased ears, and frankly seems like an archetypally effeminate response to competition as opposed to a masculine one.

 

[JD_002]

Haven't gotten there yet and I hope I never do cause that ain't healthy.