Best and Worst first things to say

[D_Yul_Tied-Karroll]

What are the worst first words a guy could say to you or the worst first impression he can give? Alternatively what are the best (for you personally, obviously)?

 

[IntoxicatingToxin]

I can't think of any specific things he could say, tbh there's a lot of fucked up things that can come out of peoples mouths.

Basically, the worst things a guy could do when first meeting are... talking about himself constantly. Being cocky. (Confident is great, cocky isn't.) Bitching about women who have burned him in the past or ex girlfriends, etcetera. Being negative in general is a turn off for me. Asking me for sex right off the bat. Ehm. I dunno. I think a better question would have been what's the best way to leave a GOOD impression... there are a lot of ways to ruin a first impression. Lol.

 

[AlteredEgo]

The worst first impression to give me would be that you don't see me as a person, but rather as either a possible lay, a collection of appealing body parts, or both.

The best first thing to say is hello. Genuine compliments are welcome. Anything that one person might say to another in any normal situation regardless of gender is probably a great way to start with me. General commentary about our surroundings/situation, especially if it is cynical or humorous, is excellent. It will still freak me out though, and I may try to escape; I don't really like to be approached by men. It's best to find a subtle way to convey interest, get out of my immediate vicinity, and let me come find you in my own time.

 

[B_Sexual_Harrassment_Panda]

Sometimes the most off-the-wall things have gotten me to smile at someone. I don't mean things like "Damn baby, you could stop traffic with that ass of yours!" but more like "Oh, you have a Stephen King book under your arm, I like him too." I don't want to first hear about the trouser snake that needs to be charmed, I'd rather hear that you like something I said or did.

 

[Daisy]

Do you mean in person? Like at a bar? Its different online and in real life.

Online, as mentioned treating me like a piece of meat or potential hook up.

In person:

worst first impressions include being overbearing, cheap, or rude to other people. Coming on too strong. Revealing WAY too much about yourself before you even know her. Trying too hard. Seeming desperate.

Where specifically, do you mean?

 

[D_Yul_Tied-Karroll]

I mean in person. In the real world.... far far away from here.

 

[orange_23]

The worst thing is when the first thing a guy asks you is for your number just out of the blue. If we have never met and the first thing you ask me for is my number then it is quite obvious what your intentions are. You didn't ask because you thought I was smart of funny or interesting but because you like the way I look. You are either one of two guys, one that wants to sleep with me and thats it or an idiot who would actually consider starting a relationship based only the fact that you think I'm hot. Its ridiculous I could be a crazy!

Not to say that you shouldn't approach a woman that you think is attractive but try noticing something else about her even the littlest thing and striking up a conversation. A little small chat can go a long way as opposed to going straight for the digits.

Oh also introduce yourself "Hi my name is (blank) what's your name?" I don't know why but I'm a sucker for etiquette it's sexy and right off the bat makes you seem like you aren't just some douche. Now thats how you start a conversation I think a lot of women would agree.

 

[EllieP]

Well, let me think. Just last week I was volunteering at this huge event, and this guy starts chatting me up and asked if I had any tattoos that I could show him because he couldn't see any. WTF????

Um, last month one guy asked if he could hug me. Just out of the blue! Again, WTF??

But then when I was dating I met this wonderful guy, attractive, a little egotistical but with good reason, I guess. It was when we were sitting down at the table with our menus and he said "you can order anything you want," that I got my first hint of trouble. Hey, thanks, I was going to anyway!

Yeah, he was one of those. Didn't make it to dessert. Damn migraine headache. Of course, I didn't tell him the headache was sitting across from me.

 

[Young N Sassy]

Ahh. There's SO many things I could put on the list of 'what not to say.' But I won't bore everyone with that.

Honestly, if a guy shows interest in me, and we start talking, I'd appreciate not being asked for my number right away (I agree with you Orange_23.) It makes it SO obvious what it is you're looking for. Learn the art of conversation first!

Also, when striking up a conversation with someone new, it should be an even 'ebb and flow' if you will. Chances are, if I'm one-wordy, its my way of telling you I'm not interested without being too rude and upfront about it. In regards to the ebb and flow, make sure you don't go on about yourself forever. Trust me, when we first meet you, we don't want to know about your childhood dog, your Aunt Edna, or your high school bully. Stick to common topics, things that most people will have an interest in. Not everyone will be as excited about your '69 Mustang or your '04 Harley.

Facial and body language are a HUGE indicator.

Basically, as they teach in sales, K.I.S.S, keep it simple, stupid! Not too overbearing, simple conversations, and progressing from there will earn you my digits.

Side note: I went through this whole process with someone and gave him my number. As I was walking out the door, he texted me saying 'I miss you already.' OK. Obviously everyone here knows not to do that. I just got reminded of that incident, and felt like sharing with the class :banghead: