if it's not too late, i would recommend to not pursue this unless you want to risk this part of your life getting out in the open. you don't know how the other person will respond to you or how they will react once they know who you are. they may freak out from guilt and spill the beans which in-turn will fuck up your life.
it can go good because you know each other but it can also go terribly wrong. since you're married and only looking for "discreet" play then it means your spouse doesn't know, right? and that you're wanting it to stay that way? cheat if you must or want as i will never judge anyone for their own decisions however i'm trying to save you from a potential disaster.
this has happened to me more than a few times when my wife and i were looking for a third to join us in the bedroom. in all occasions except 2, it was either a boyfriend or husband that either of us knew. we simply gave them a courtesy of telling them we "know who you are" and "please stop contacting us". the last thing i wanted to do was to out these men and women in our circle of friends and family. to this day we have not spoken a word to anyone and our perception of these men and women have not changed when we see them at social gatherings.
my friends and family know my wife and i were and still are active swingers so they knew we fucked around but we never involved our friends or family in our antics. too much drama and when shit hits the fan, there's no telling what will happen. it's easier to avoid a newly-friended stranger than a long-time friend or family.
good luck. there's plenty of guys out there to play with. i would avoid this one entirely. remember that fantasy in your head runs according to plan. reality, on the other hand, does not.
