So death adverted. It was a nice evening and way more than we could have expected. It was, actually, enjoyable. Funny, how they went from disaster to triumph. I attribute that to love. To me, at least, clearly, Peter and I are in love. That focuses the mind and we are not dumb. We know what is important: Us, Family, Education, Repeat.
We settle in to a new kind of normal. I don’t like the term, but having Mom or a sibling ask about my boyfriend is odd. Having women confide – chit, chat like I was one of the girls is not what I like. Guys are guys and girls are girls. Do I need Sammie asking me if I think that dude there is hot? Or worse, hung? She wanted me to pee next to the guy and report back. NO! Not how this works. I put the kabosh on that very quickly.
But I did feel like I was missing something. Oh, it’s great to be “gay” in the internet world of today – you can google any question and read for hours. But I felt like I was missing something. I just didn’t feel openly gay. I mean, I usually start and end the day with my cock and his cock inside each other’s body for physical passion and my heart could literally burst with love…but I didn’t feel gay.
That’s it. Risky or not, I want to find my people and I’m figuring the best way to do that is via a gay bar. DuckDuckGo: Woody’s. Oldest gay bar in Philly. I text Peter that I’m going to Woody’s and if I’m not back by midnight, call the cops. And that’s it.
So, I am just going, I want to meet some real gay guys and talk to them. I am not going for sex. But the thought intrigues me. What will the bar be like? Will I get turned on by the guys? Or repulsed? I literally do not know. I figure I’ll grab a seat at the bar – surely they have one – and see who wants to chat. I skim through my closet. Interesting, I’ve never really dressed to be gay. I want to be hot and have guys want to talk to me. That’s a way different strategy that dressing to impress a chick. Or is it? Tight white fitted shirt for the pecs. Dab of cologne. And then tight shorts, commando and flip flops. Nails trimmed and hair just right. Have I got this right? I am actually both nervous and excited. Fuck, ah, gotta say – I look hot, says the magic mirror.
I Uber over and Peter texts that I’m crazy, watch out, and text if needed. And be careful coming home. Do not walk, do not go alone, but do Uber. The Uber drops me off. Smallish bar, seating outside. Lots of dudes. I catch a look or three, as I suck it up and enter the first gay bar I’ve ever been to in my entire life. Yeah, my world is changing a bit. “Hey there handsome” a guy voices out. “Hey man” and I keep going to the bar. Taking the place in. Semi naked guys dancing to thumping music, and a line of guys going up and down the stairs. Must be more downstairs.
“Welcome to Woody’s, what can I get you?” says a bare chested and very fit bartender. Fun. “I’m new here, so what’s good” and that earns me a smile. A not-so-well-intended smile. Like I’m road meat and he’s the vulture. Fuck, need to watch for roofies – that’s all I need. Better get a bottle of beer. Hard to doctor that. “You know what, let me have a Modelo” and vulture boy nods. I do notice he has a nice ass. Huh – probably a job requirement. I toss a twenty down and sip my beer.
“Hey stranger. Haven’t seen you here before.” And I turn to my left to see a not young, but not old – probably mid-thirties, guy. Decent looking. Well, it’s what you came for. “I’m new to Philly and new to the scene” and he smiles. Or leers. “I’m Stevie” and we shake hands. Soft, effeminate hands. My grip was firm. I don’t like Stevie, but no reason to be rude. “You’re a hottie – want to dance?” and I shake no. “Just here to chat” and he puts his hand on my knee, or really his paw on my knee. I remove it. “Thanks, but no thanks” and he humpfs and turns to leave. Maybe this wasn’t the best idea. I’m watching some wild dancing on the floor. Lots of groping and gyrating. Cock on cock and cock on ass. I can see guys that are hard. Huh.
“Hi there handsome” and a very gaudy drag queen in full costume sits next to me. Wow. Not ready for that. “How are you?” and he/she is going on about how handsome I am and how strong I look and do I like his/her makeup and I actually warmed up a little. This was at least a real person. We chatted a little and then he/she left. Fuck. I figure, let me check the scene downstairs. I grab a fresh Modelo and head down. I was literally groped three times as I walked to the stairs.
Kind of a lounge area, quieter. Day Glo colors. Lots of private nooks that seemed to be very busy. I walked around the room. Lots of guys shirts undone or shirtless, leaning back against the wall, foot up, I’d say looking to get cruised. Some hot. Lots of “Sup” and “Hey man” and “Wanna suck or fuck man?” and it’s interesting. I figure let me take a leak and then I’ll settle in. Well – the wall to the men’s room was crowded. Guys making out. One on his knees blowing another guy. Trough urinal, crowded. Stalls all closed and more than one set of feet in there. You can smell the testosterone and the floor looks slippery with what I’d suggest is spent cum. Guys standing there, some pissing, some swinging their hardon or semi cock, looking for action. Hot or sad? Or both, really. I take a spot and all eyes go to my cock as I whip it out and start peeing three guys start to stroke harder. All eyes on it. My ass gets groped left and right and I hear “can I take you home, baby” and it was odd.
So when in Rome. I put on a show. My shorts were unzipped and cock and balls are out peeing, and I’m getting a semi and I’m showing off good. One guy slips his hand inside my shorts and grabs my ass. “No thank you” I tell him. But I had their attention. “What’s the matter pretty boy – don’t want to share your pretty cock?” and I finish up and put my dick back in and zip up fast. Skipped the shake. It’s dark. And I turn and get out of the room. The lounge is way more safe. Fuck, that was freaky. I lean at a tall table – sticky, and scan the room. Some nice looking guys, for sure, but appearances can bely. And a few no-go guys, too. A topless guy in tight pants, prominent bulge and cowboy boots eyes me and does a nod. I nod back. He leaves his spot and walks over.
“Hey man – JJ here. What’s your name” and I introduce myself and we shake. “Busy night here at the Wood, aint it?” and I nod. “My first time here” and he looks at me. And smiles. “A newbie. Okay. Here is the deal. There are some great guys here. But some crazies too. Stand your ground, but watch your ass. You really should bring a wingman with you next time. You are too pretty to safely navigate this alone.” I just nod.
“What are you looking for tonight?” and he grabs his crotch and leaves his hand there, massaging it. It was kind of hot, actually. “Just company. I’m new to Philly” and he nods. “Well, there are glory holes over there. That back hallway leads to the back room. Don’t go there unless you plan on getting fucked or to fuck a guy you are bringing with you. Do not get into the sling unless you want to be gang-raped. Same with the ass holes.” And I’m puzzled by the double meaning. “Sorry, what are ass-holes other than the obvious?” and he smiles.
“Follow me” and I do and we go down another hall and there are a row of guys fucking other guys, apparently on their backs, through a wooden wall cut out so it’s an anonymous fuck. Huh. Legs are up in stirrups and one guy finished and you can see cum dripping from the just fucked guy. Another guy kneels down and licks the cum from his ass and stands up and pushes his dick in. Well, well. New definition of sloppy seconds. “You wanna try?” and I shake my head. “A little too much for me”, as I have hands wrapped around me, a hard cock at my ass and hands fumbling on my cock. I turn around and it’s a tall, young kid. Hot body and a hot cock. My dick is swelling in response. I get a kiss on my neck and a whispered “I can make you very, very happy” and JJ leans in to me “Yeah, for $100 he’ll blow you and for $200 he’ll fuck you. And what is it for an overnight, Billy, still $500? How are the herpes treating you now, all gone?” and the hands are suddenly not on my cock. And the dick is not on my ass.
“He’s a pro. Lots of them there. Question everyone’s motivation towards you. And watch what you drink and don’t leave your drink unattended. Or your money out or your phone out or your cock or ass out. They will be abused here. Especially you.” And I look at him. “What’s your motivation in being nice to me?” and he smiles. “Cuz you are hot as fuck and I’m gonna work my ass off to try and get you to fuck me tonight. Just so we are clear.” And I nod. Well at least he was honest. “So any chance you’d like me to stuff you with my 10 incher until you are begging for mercy?” and I look at him. “You have a 10 inch cock?” and he nods and smiles. “It’s kind of my closing line. Seals the deal most of the time. C’mere” and he pulls my hand to a back corner and unzips his pants – commando, and a massive – seven inches soft at least. And JJ puts his hands on my shoulders and pushes me down.
Ah, yes, the universal I want a blow job signal. And he pushes harder. I go down. I do want to check it out. I’ve only had Peter’s to compare to mine. JJ’s cut, but he’s also growing fast. And I handle it and feel the heft. He has undersized balls. Way too small relative to the cock. Nice bush and it smells nice, soapy and it looks clean. Yep, that’s 10 inches when fully hard, which he almost is. He’s trying to get it into my firmly closed mouth. “Open up, baby, make me feel good.” And he smears precum on my lips. And he’s bat slapping my cheeks, trying to temp me. I like holding it. It’s fatter than a Heineken bottle, but skinnier that the Modelo bottle I’m holding. I stand up. “Nice one man. But I don’t blind suck strangers.” And he has a twisted look on his face. “You fucking got me hard, cock tease. Then you leave me with blue balls” and I look into his eyes. “You offered to show me your cock. Which I wanted to see. You did not ask me nor did I agree to blow you. Back down and we can continue our conversation, or we will end it now. Your call” and he’s quiet. But he stuffs his cock in with a slight jump and toss. He’s still hard and it’s obscene. “Let’s grab a table outside.”
This is much nicer. Out of the thundering music, and away from groping hands. It’s nice to see men chatting normally – holding hands. Some on laps, no doubt with stiff cocks being excited beneath their rears. This is more my speed. “So JJ – tell me about you.” And he nods and starts telling me his story. Younger than me, just out of college. He said he hustled in college and as such graduated with no student debt. He winks at me – lots of people will pay big dollars for 10 inches on a young stud. And I nod. No judgement here.
“Who were your usual clients?” and he nods. “There was no usual, really. This was back when Craigslist still had the personals section and I’d put ads up. Lots of bored housewives looking to get well-dicked. Lots of repeat bored house wives looking for multiple orgasms. Lots of gay dudes looking to get stretched out. I’d get pictures before and only fucked safe. Kept it real and made tons of cash.” I nod. Smart dude. “Out of curiosity, what were your rates?” and he lists off some very expensive rates. “But I’d adjust my rates to the Jane or John. Saggy tits, $200 more. Fat ass on a dude, same. It had the joint benefit of weeding out the undesirables and of providing incentive to get the job done.” Smart guy.
“So, like, I take it you are bi, if you can play on both teams.” And he looks at me and sips his beer. “Funny that. Nope. I’m really just a straight guy with a big dick that dudes will pay more than chicks to get fucked by. It was a means to an end. I guess I like dick and I’ve had boyfriends with benefits as well as girlfriends with benefits, but labels don’t really work for me. I like sex, and I like that most people can’t say no to me (eyeing me hard). Oh sure, lots of chicks scurry out of bed if I don’t tell them in advance – but that’s more of a personal thing, and I make sure – personal hook-up or work, that they know what to expect. And funny – dudes are so much easier. We want the same thing. So when I’m super horny, like tonight, I’ll get a guy, fast, on his knees and get one sucked out. Usually works just fine. Then I can go about my evening in a more relaxed fashion.”
I was taking in every word. Kinda matches my world a little. Except for the hooker part. “Are you still working?” and he looks around. “You are not a cop, right?” and I smile and assure him I am not. “Every now and then when I need extra cash. I figure I have about 10 years till retirement will be forced. And if twice a month nets me $50K in a year – that’s a nice way to a down payment on a house.
“Do you have a day job?” and he smiles. “I do real estate” and I nod. “Bet that gets you jobs, too” and he winks at me. “See, I use the cash from servicing to live on – miscellaneous cash deposits into the bank are red flags to the IRS. So I bank my work checks, with minimal checks written to live – I pay like $200 for rent each month via check, and $1,200 cash. And I chose an apartment that would support my lifestyle and that would allow me to pay that way. My landlord is happy every month.” Shrewd guy. “Lots of ‘over-night’ sex requests, which is very lucrative. A bit of a drag sometimes, but lucrative.” I kind of like JJ.
“I need to take a leak, but I don’t want to go solo. You want to play wingman for 5 minutes? And he nods. ‘Di – hold this table, I’m taking my buddy to piss’ and he slips the waitress some cash. And he motions me to go first. I am unmolested this time, and he takes a good look at my cock. “Nice one man” and I smile and nod. “Nine inches, so you got me beat” and he smiles. “We should team up – we can make some cash with that” and I smile and shake this time and put it back. Yeah, we got some looks. Washed the hands this time. “Not an option, but thank you for the suggestion.”