How do I start to come out?

[slutboi69]

Over the last few months I've been trying to discover myself more and came to the conclusion that I am in fact attracted to men. I am not exactly sure if I am gay or bisexual, but I know I am definitely attracted to men.

I am not there where I can just come out right away fully and announce "everybody, I'm gay/bi" but I think I am definitely ready to begin presenting myself/being more open about it and start actually coming out.

Does anybody have any tips on this and how I can do this?

 

[AceCT54]

Do you feel like you need to tell people? It's not really any of their business. Life's too short. Just be yourself and don't feel like you have to put a label on it.

 

[Macncheeses]

Do you feel like you need to tell people? It's not really any of their business. Life's too short. Just be yourself and don't feel like you have to put a label on it.

Second this. If you feel like you need to tell someone, just tell them. Otherwise, be yourself and live your best life.

 

[chrisrobin]

Be yourself. Coming out with big placards isn't really the thing to do - in any case what business is it of other people's. Just do what you want.

 

[chrissal480]

The thing about coming out is don’t do it in such a way that it’s a big deal for yourself ..

If they see it la a huge deal for you then they will sense that

First thing is definitely know if you are bisexual or gay and go from there .. I won’t sit here and say all gay men have tried sex with women.. as I am sure there are some that’s never been with any..

I have screwed a couple women over the years but I never seen their cunts— I’d just guide it to the hole and begin sliding it in or she helps do it..

I think if I was to actually see it that I wouldn’t be hard for long… and that doesn’t really bother me as I am pretty much a bottom


But just be happy with yourself and figure yourself out first.. .. and go from there

You will also find out who your true friends are and others that aren’t .. they begin to think you want sex with them( the guys that is) .. I’d tell them I’d rather have your friendship than your cock ..


My family or should say my close family is fine with it — but I didn’t really care.. I had to be who I am not what I am .. and I never hid the fact I was gay . Guys asked me I said yes .. I figure as long as my parents accept me for it then that’s all that matters ..

 

[trojbi]

I kinda find the fact that we have to come out and it be a big deal a chore lol. Like why does kinda at work need to know who I like the fuck? I found it so much a chore that I encouraged my straight friends to out me to my more fringe acquaintances so I didn’t have to bother.

Personally I focused on the people I cared most about. It was important to me to be able to be my true self around them. And I almost felt like I needed to apologize for lying to them for years although they didn’t feel that i needed to.

But the question is, are you ready to come out to your closest friends and family unit or are you ready to be out cause those are different things. I feel like as much training that we do over years to hide our sexuality takes some time to be undone.

If you feel comfortable I would just stop censoring yourself. You don’t have to tell everyone you like men, but maybe in mixed company when you’re telling a funny dating/hookup story don’t switch the gender of the person. If you see a hot guy tell your friends about it like they would a woman.

You kind of have to come out to yourself ultimately to feel comfortable being “out”!

 

[Jlatinochub]

Start with your closest relationships. I had best friends in high school and I told them first. I told my mom and grandma because I knew their love was unconditional and my mom is still my top supporter. Choose who will make your decision the best situation.

 

[theplayerking]

Over the last few months I've been trying to discover myself more and came to the conclusion that I am in fact attracted to men. I am not exactly sure if I am gay or bisexual, but I know I am definitely attracted to men.

I am not there where I can just come out right away fully and announce "everybody, I'm gay/bi" but I think I am definitely ready to begin presenting myself/being more open about it and start actually coming out.

Does anybody have any tips on this and how I can do this?

Here are a couple of tips on coming out.

You need to start with yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror every morning and say, preferably out loud, “I’m attracted to and enjoy having sex with other men.” I may feel cheesy and awkward at first, but the point is to get comfortable articulating your feelings, at least to yourself.

The second tip is that it’s much easier introducing something that is concrete rather than abstract. It’s easier to say, “I’d like you to meet my boyfriend,” rather than “I think I might be gay, bisexual, etc.” Most people nowadays will just say, ok, and move on.

 

[briacon429]

Over the last few months I've been trying to discover myself more and came to the conclusion that I am in fact attracted to men. I am not exactly sure if I am gay or bisexual, but I know I am definitely attracted to men.

I am not there where I can just come out right away fully and announce "everybody, I'm gay/bi" but I think I am definitely ready to begin presenting myself/being more open about it and start actually coming out.

Does anybody have any tips on this and how I can do this?

Start with your closest relationships. I had best friends in high school and I told them first. I told my mom and grandma because I knew their love was unconditional and my mom is still my top supporter. Choose who will make your decision the best situation.

Jlatino’s response is a good example of how you’ve gotta do what’s right for you… because I did the exact opposite! (Nothing against this strategy of course, and I totally agree you’ve gotta use your judgment.)

I started by telling people I didn’t know very well, because that came with no pressure. Then, once I got used to the idea of telling people, I started coming out to closer friends. The last people to find out were my parents, not because I tried to hide it or anything, but because I needed to work my way up to that. But it went fine in the end: the anticipation turned out to be way more nerve wracking than anything else.

The point being, do whatever you’re comfortable with. There’s no right or wrong way to do this! If you wanna chat in detail, feel free to DM me….

 

[PeterJoe]

If you ever get a boyfriend, just say, "this is Dylan, my boyfriend". Other than my mom, that is how I came out to most people, and that was 24 years ago.