How do you feel right after sex?

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Javierdude22: I am not really pre-occupied by anything, and certainly not my performance (ahum 8)) thank God.

It is definately all between the ears. I am not sure where the worries come from. I think it might be a mixture of things that cause them. My worries about my sexuality, and how to deal with it. Expectations, cause even though i would definately like to have that 'moviemade' relationship, i tend to back off when the heat is too much. And maybe, from a psychologically Freudian perspective, something from my childhood is blocking all this, but i havent got a clue.

Jackinman- I am happy to say i am generally happy about almost every part of my life, frineds, family, career/study, social life etc. I'm also pretty upbeat and the clown in any group :-/.

Only the relationship/sex part brings me down every now and then, and humanity decided that that is a pretty important part of someone's life

It is like people expect me to walk, but i have no legs, ya know. Maybe any of the people that mentioned they feel the same can tell us the reason, if they know it?

 

[D_Martin van Burden]

[quote author=joe22xxx link=board=relationships;num=1059820587;start=0#15 date=08/06/03 at 01:49:38]For me it was all about fear. I was afraid that the woman I was having sex with wanted more from me than I could ever give....[/quote]

For me, it's the total opposite. I have engaged in more noncommital (i.e. one night stands, bootie calls) sex than sex with a monogamous partner, and I think "getting out of there" perfectly describes the aftermath. Don't get me wrong; some of the sex was quite pleasurable and fun. I guess you could call it guilt there, too. I enjoyed what I was doing and felt fine after getting off, and though I'm not particularly shopping around for the love of my life now, I guess the guilt reflects a further discomfort in wondering... as corny as this sounds... if I'll ever find that true love out there.

But again, those are fleeting feelings. I feel bad for a little while and then I get distracted by something or someone else's company (not necessarily another sexual encounter), so I don't dwell on things. Right now, if at any time, I feel like my life's demanding for me to be more focused on priorities. I start graduate school in a few weeks -- thank goodness! -- and understand that I will be pretty busy with the books, the internships, the opportunities.

(You know, I find the honesty in this thread quite refreshing. It seems as if people can feel guilty or self-loathing over their sex lives, whether they're in the name of love or if bootie calls prove too much of a good thing.)

 

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sammygirly: Maybe that's why I dont feel this guilt - I only have sex with people I'm very deeply involved in. It's not that I dont enjoy sex (we can all tell I do, yes?) nor do I look down on anyone who doesn't practise what I do in this regard...

...tis simply that I dont want those guilty feelings.

Might not be for you, but something to consider.

 

[13788]

Trackers: [quote author=Javierdude23 link=board=relationships;num=1059820587;start=20#20 date=08/11/03 at 02:37:21]I am not really pre-occupied by anything, and certainly not my performance (ahum 8)) thank God.[/quote]

Javier. I'm sure you would put on a wonderful performance in bed. So you don't need to worry there.

As for me, well my post sex blues are only fairly recent. Like I said earlier I used to feel great. Now I don't, and the only cause I can think of is that sometimes I can feel guilty, and that is a horrible feeling.

 

[jay_too]

Me? I feel euphoric and want to cuddle for a few minutes. A part is probably related to finally getting the nuts off after an hour or so of foreplay. I guess it is a sense of accomplishment and pride. Then...I am really energized (think Tarzan beating his chest). Dozing after sex? I don't think so.

jay