Need Advice on Dildos! Help!

[shortygothefatty]

Hello, I don’t know if this is the right place to ask but I wanted some advice or help for something…

So, I would love to pleasure myself with some good dildo, but I live with my parents and I cannot buy myself one since I have nowhere to hide it.

That’s why I wanted to ask you guys, do you think there’s something else I could use/buy to pleasure myself that isn’t necessarily a real dildo?

I need a discreet object that doesn’t look suspicious. Any suggestions? (I don’t like hairbrushes)

 

[deleted13488411]

There are a lot of horror stories about things getting stuck or doing major damage when guys start experimenting with strange objects. I would advice you to be very careful and to just enjoy your own fingers untill you have some more privacy.

 

[slowsucknj]

A sturdy shower squeegee with a good round handle. Dual function. Works for me

 

[chrisrobin]

Would a cucumber or zucchini look suspicious? I use both!

 

[deleted15682271]

Honestly I would just buy a dildo and find a place to hide it. Way better than a banana.

 

[slowsucknj]

Honestly I would just buy a dildo and find a place to hide it. Way better than a banana.

Agreed - best option. Butt plugs and a small prostate massager hides well too.

 

[shortygothefatty]

Would a cucumber or zucchini look suspicious? I use both!

I tried the zucchini. guess i'm too tight lol

forgot to mention i never had sex with a real dick....

 

[hzs3fg]

People in your

Hello, I don’t know if this is the right place to ask but I wanted some advice or help for something…

So, I would love to pleasure myself with some good dildo, but I live with my parents and I cannot buy myself one since I have nowhere to hide it.

That’s why I wanted to ask you guys, do you think there’s something else I could use/buy to pleasure myself that isn’t necessarily a real dildo?

I need a discreet object that doesn’t look suspicious. Any suggestions? (I don’t like hairbrushes)

People in your situation have often solved the problem by finding something that can pass as a work of art or some other innocuous object that can be left right out in the open on top of your dresser or bookshelf.

For example, https://www.amazon.com/Don-Wand-Gla...d=1549594585&sr=1-1&keywords=glass+candy+cane

 

[Chanceorlando]

put a condom on the round handle end of a screwdriver....about the right size you can't "lose". They come in a variety of sizes; thick, thin, long, short

 

[shortygothefatty]

People in your


People in your situation have often solved the problem by finding something that can pass as a work of art or some other innocuous object that can be left right out in the open on top of your dresser or bookshelf.

For example, https://www.amazon.com/Don-Wand-Gla...d=1549594585&sr=1-1&keywords=glass+candy+cane

that’s interesting! thank you

 

[GS_PL]

I don't know if they sell them anymore, but due to it's alternate pleasurable use, finding one at a yard sale would be unlikely. I'd recommend that plastic toy that has a white base and a yellow knob with different sized colored rings to be placed on the yellow knob meant for....learning. I think the company that made or makes it rhymes with "Swisher Dice".

 

[chrisrobin]

I tried the zucchini. guess i'm too tight lol

forgot to mention i never had sex with a real dick....

Zucchini come in various sizes so look for a small one and work up - or a long thin cucumber.
Dip it in hot water to make it warm then your asshole will be better placed to open up and take it.

 

[NaddyX]

Lotsa good ideas here. any more. Not sure she wud be receptive to veggies, but I might try it.

 

[deleted17065231]

I wouldn't use anything but a proper toy made for anal. You're just asking for trouble. A proper butt plug or dildo. Unless you won't mind having to explain to the ER people why you have that thing up your pooper.

 

[frank31]

Back in the day, i used a firm banana with a condom. Nothing happened but not a great idea. We need to be careful about sharp edges, even with vegetables and always use a condom. You don’t want an broken veggie up your ass. That’s why using real sex toy is strongly recommended.

 

[steveto]

You think your parents would be unhappy with you buying a dildo, would they mind taking you to the ER?

Never use something as a dildo that wasn't designed for that purpose. Screwdrivers and vegetables don't have flanges to stop them getting stuck inside you and are awkward to grip on. They're also dangerously rigid and have many rough spots and hard edges.

Just buy a dildo or use your fingers until you move out.

 

[WilliamG]

I'm not condoning this. My opinion is it's safe(ish) but...

My first time really going after it was with an empty Coke bottle. Put warm water in it for a warmup. And climb on (on a soft surface below it). The best part is it's smooth and flairs WAY out when you slide down on it. And that girlfriend used to have Playgirls left out for me to view. Good times...

 

[ILoveGames48]

I had a few dildos in my room.. put them in a lock box with combination .. slid it under the bed ..

So phase one.. find something that will lock and slide under your bed mine is 16 inches long 8 inches wide so when slide it under the bed shove it against the wall then put other things in front of it make it look like normal..


Then buy a toy or two and lube and hide them ..

 

[SubbySlutForBigDick]

I'm not condoning this. My opinion is it's safe(ish) but...

My first time really going after it was with an empty Coke bottle. Put warm water in it for a warmup. And climb on (on a soft surface below it). The best part is it's smooth and flairs WAY out when you slide down on it. And that girlfriend used to have Playgirls left out for me to view. Good times...

No no no never use glass bottles

 

[ILoveGames48]

Glass bottles is a bad thing like a coke bottle .. a guy I knew used one and the suction from fucking himself with it got the bottle stuck inside .. he called me and I went to see his problem.. .. he said just break the bottle I said no the pressure of the suction could pull in all the broken glass ..

I finally found a long skinny stick and told him don’t move . I slid it inside him and worked it around the best I can.. then few minutes later we heard this suction sound and it was the bottle sucking air into it and voila the bottle was loose ..

Then we made sure he was ok .. and then gave him something he loved a lot better than that bottle