Questions For Trans Men On Dating Cis Men.

[Lol234]

Hey so I am a 23-year-old gay cis man and I want to have a family someday, but I do not want to adopt. I think trans men are really cute and handsome, but I have a question on dating and developing relationships.

So is there a general opinion on how trans men feel about getting pregnant? Or being wanted because they can reproduce with cis men? I'm worried that if I date a trans man and tell them that I want to have children with them, they will feel creeped out or threatened, because they may assume I am relating to them as a woman, and that the idea of getting pregnant will trigger dysphoria.

I see trans men as men, but I want to know how trans guys feel about gay cis guys approaching them to start families.

 

[dontevenworryaboutit]

Honestly? I think your best bet is to join a dating group for trans men and cis men. There are some I've heard of on facebook before. Personally, I avoid them at all costs because they attract chasers, among many other reasons... however, there's trans people who do use those sorts of groups to date/hookup/etc.

I would say though, that you'd really have to luck out to find a trans guy you're compatible with, who you actually want to spend your life with, and then who also feels the same as you, and then on top of that, wants to have bio kids, and then again on top of that, doesn't experience fertility issues. I would be evaluating my stance on adoption and probably talking through that with someone.

I don't know how many trans men are ok with pregnancy VS how many aren't. There are plenty of trans men in the world who have halted their transition to give birth... but then there's also tons who are on the other side of the spectrum - they can't stand the thought of their natal genitals, couldn't handle pregnancy etc. You aren't going to know for sure until you get to know the individual really.

I guess the best thing you can do is find a space for dating with trans men who are also gay or bi, and be up front about your intentions, while not trying to come off as some weird chaser or someone with a fetish for pregnant men.

 

[Lol234]

Honestly? I think your best bet is to join a dating group for trans men and cis men. There are some I've heard of on facebook before. Personally, I avoid them at all costs because they attract chasers, among many other reasons... however, there's trans people who do use those sorts of groups to date/hookup/etc.

I would say though, that you'd really have to luck out to find a trans guy you're compatible with, who you actually want to spend your life with, and then who also feels the same as you, and then on top of that, wants to have bio kids, and then again on top of that, doesn't experience fertility issues. I would be evaluating my stance on adoption and probably talking through that with someone.

I don't know how many trans men are ok with pregnancy VS how many aren't. There are plenty of trans men in the world who have halted their transition to give birth... but then there's also tons who are on the other side of the spectrum - they can't stand the thought of their natal genitals, couldn't handle pregnancy etc. You aren't going to know for sure until you get to know the individual really.

I guess the best thing you can do is find a space for dating with trans men who are also gay or bi, and be up front about your intentions, while not trying to come off as some weird chaser or someone with a fetish for pregnant men.

I spoke to a friend about it. They told me another thing we could do, is just to use my sperm and their eggs and implant it into another person to carry the pregnancy. So technically, the child would biologically be both ours, but they would be growing in another person. Similar to surrogacy with gay couples, except the child would be related to both of us.

I also took your advice and followed a couple of trans/cis men dating groups, but in a lot of them, most of the people that use them are not my age.