At the age of 37, I’m struggling with my sexuality. Watching gay porn for over 2 decades has gotten wanted to experiment/experience a man. I’ve came close a couple times and something happened to where I harden gone through with it. I have always said that I’m bi curious but that’s not the fact at all. I finally admitted to myself that I’m bisexual. Sometime I wonder if I’m more than that. I mean I still love women and love pussy. But it seems I love dick more and I’ve never had. I have pussy on tap and can get it from other women easily with a little convo. But I am craving men lately. Am I gay or am I just so fascinated with men to the point that I wake up and go sleep thinking about dick/ gay sex. I’ve tried to stop watching gay porn but it’s so hard. I’ve gone months at a time almost a year, then I fall victim to the dick again. Every morning I wake up, I go on my X/Twitter acct and indulge in some dick or gay sex before I take my morning piss. Periodically throughout day I look at it, when I’m bored, when I get anxious and need to calm down. It really calms me. It doesn’t help that I have a homophonic girlfriend, she claims she isn’t. But anytime she men kissing on movies, shows or anytime she’s on her X acct, she hollers ewww “I don’t want to see that shit”. If only she knew, I want to do the same. It took me a long time to admit I attracted to men or want to kiss them. At first, I just wanted to be versatile with them. But I indeed want to kiss them go down on them, 69 anything I’ll do with a woman. I have type of man that im attracted to. I don’t know what to do, I want to experience gay sex but I don’t want to be outted or anything until I’m ready to say something. But I want some dick and some ass.
Struggling
- Thread starter alphamale175
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You need to find someone online to release that pent up sexual energy that you have. Someone who is as discreet as you need to be and either respectful of your situation or in the same boat.
dickthrobbing
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Maybe not, you are defiantly bi curious.
You have an itch you need to scratch and that is to have sex with another guy. The next step and its a big one is to hook up with a guy, always easier said than done.
Once you get past the first time you'll know if you want more cock occasionally or if you are totally into it as pussy is a thing of the past
First, labels don't really mean all that much. I think attraction really is more a range on a spectrum rather than a concrete black and white either totally this or totally that. As far as wanting to experiment, I'll just say that if you decide doing something would bring happiness to you, don't let fear of what others may think stop you from seeking personal happiness.
As far as the relationship, if the only way you can maintain the relationship is abandoning and hiding your inner desires for your life, it's not likely to be conducive to finding long term happiness. It's more likely that all it will do at some point is just breed anger and resentment, and that's not fair for you, or her either.
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Take a look at Sniffies. Great way to scratch the itch.
