Thoughts on men who like their ass played with

[BigCorona]

In the last few years, I have become more open and in touch with what gives pleasure. I have an FWB that has helped me with this a lot. The latest discovery the amount of pleasure that comes with having a prostrate. Having an intense vibrator or prostate massager in my ass while being sucked, stroked, or teased is amazing. My question to the women here is two part:
1) Is a man that is that in touch with what provides him pleasure a turn on or a red flag to most women?
2) When is comes to dating average women, meaning those met through normal means and not through sites or events that could be associated to sex forums, how would the subject of anal play be broached after becoming comfortable with the person you are dating?

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

1) Is a man that is that in touch with what provides him pleasure a turn on or a red flag to most women?
2) When is comes to dating average women, meaning those met through normal means and not through sites or events that could be associated to sex forums, how would the subject of anal play be broached after becoming comfortable with the person you are dating?

I won't answer for "most women" because I can only speak for myself. Yes it's a turn on.

I'm an up front, open person. I don't sugar coat, and I don't beat around the bush. Here, or in person. No matter how a partner is met, once there's a level of comfort I have no issues simply telling them my turn-ons etc.

Like I said, I'm only speaking for lil ol' me.

 

[693987]

For me?

1. I think it is great for people to know what provides them pleasure, so long as it's safe, sane, consensual, etc.

2. I'm a blunt person and I generally prefer blunt, extremely up front communication.

 

[MickeyLee]

I'm a freak. I bed down with freaks. Ass play is sort of a given.

How would I go about letting my desires be known?

Well, I am a grown-up, doing the grown-up... I would let my partner know what I like and hope they were game.
The big thing is not to pout or try to coerce someone into participating in something they are not cool with.

 

[AlteredEgo]

I see if he tenses up when I tease the taint. If there is no tension, I ask if he's ever done that kind of play. If there is tension, I ask if he was afraid I was angling for that kind of play.

 

[Holly Doors]

I think it's fantastic to be in touch with your body and know exactly what you like.

I guess you're talking about asking a partner who may be considered as prudish or maybe a basic bitch? Lol, I dunno I'm pretty up front tbh, maybe try saying something like you heard about this thing that's meant to be really good and that you're interested in trying!

 

[950483]

1. I don't know what most women think. A man who likes anal stuff wouldn't be a turn off or a problem for me personally.
2. Simple. Have a face to face conversation using words to talk about it. I just ask them. Being able to have comfortable easy communication about sex is a turn on.

 

[286798]

1) Is a man that is that in touch with what provides him pleasure a turn on or a red flag to most women?

F no!!!! It's a huge turn on. Whatever it is that is his thing. Even if it's something that I'm not particularly interested in, I really dig when a person knows what they want. Re: butt play, I wouldn't say I'm excited about it in and of itself (it's not like I get any physical pleasure out of it), but I do want my partner to be happy and the naughty factor works for me.

My first experience with it was with a guy who would not verbalize what he wanted in bed. Like ever. (That was a problem) While he was on his back and I was going down on him, he lifted his knees a bit. I took that as an invitation to touch his taint... like AE said, there was no tension. Subsequent encounters led to him lifting his knees more & more, so I explored more & more. I would have much rather him being able to tell me what works for him than for me to guess at what was going to be crossing the line.

Oh, I did have an odd first date with a guy who told me he wanted me to peg him. We weren't having a particularly flirty conversation. It was right in the middle of his salad. In a middle of a crowded restaurant. We hadn't hugged or anything. I'm pretty open minded, but THAT was too much, too soon.

 

[AlteredEgo]

F no!!!! It's a huge turn on. Whatever it is that is his thing. Even if it's something that I'm not particularly interested in, I really dig when a person knows what they want. Re: butt play, I wouldn't say I'm excited about it in and of itself (it's not like I get any physical pleasure out of it), but I do want my partner to be happy and the naughty factor works for me.

My first experience with it was with a guy who would not verbalize what he wanted in bed. Like ever. (That was a problem) While he was on his back and I was going down on him, he lifted his knees a bit. I took that as an invitation to touch his taint... like AE said, there was no tension. Subsequent encounters led to him lifting his knees more & more, so I explored more & more. I would have much rather him being able to tell me what works for him than for me to guess at what was going to be crossing the line.

Oh, I did have an odd first date with a guy who told me he wanted me to peg him. We weren't having a particularly flirty conversation. It was right in the middle of his salad. In a middle of a crowded restaurant. We hadn't hugged or anything. I'm pretty open minded, but THAT was too much, too soon.

Pleases pass the blue cheese, and penetrate me. LOL

 

[BigCorona]

I guess you're talking about asking a partner who may be considered as prudish or maybe a basic bitch? Lol, I dunno I'm pretty up front tbh, maybe try saying something like you heard about this thing that's meant to be really good and that you're interested in trying!

Really, it's more about understanding women more. I am reentering the dating world, but I am much less 'vanilla' than the last time I was here (~20 years ago). It can't hurt to study ahead, can it? LOL

 

[nailz]

1) No.
2) By using your words.

Obviously "will you peg me" is not a first date topic, but I thought it worth mentioning since this is LPSG

 

[sweetlucky12]

I’ve never given it much thought to be honest @BigCorona, but I have always wanted to try a strap on so if you are down with it....

 

[BigCorona]

I’ve never given it much thought to be honest @BigCorona, but I have always wanted to try a strap on so if you are down with it....

Let's walk before we run there Gorgeous! I may have a bit of a crush, but that might be a bit much for a first date. LOL

 

[AlteredEgo]

I see if he tenses up when I tease the taint. If there is no tension, I ask if he's ever done that kind of play. If there is tension, I ask if he was afraid I was angling for that kind of play.

I should clarify this. I don't care one way or another. I'm probably not gonna do pegging. I have emotional turmoil surrounding that. We'd have to be super close and have lots of trust equity built up before I would be able to discuss pegging without triggering my flight impulse. But a tongue, a finger, my warm breath, a kiss? I can provide these things if he likes, or leave it be if there is no interest. I'd hate to think he's interested and going without due to fear or insecurity. So I check in this non-verbal way, and have a chat based on his response.