Thoughts On Toxic Masculinity?

[PorterLover69]

Is it hard for a heterosexual man to fit into the macho culture or standard definition of being a man . Such as being seen as a masculine figure , and representing dominance, ect.

I have heterosexual friends who act in public as the straight football players who are jocks . While in closed doors , they would act much more themselves. They will show emotions like actual human beings should , and have a totally new personality.

One heterosexual friend , a peer since elementary, outed me out of his internalized homophobia. After a few years after outing, he texted me to experiment, while he was with his girlfriend at the time. He will have a stable relationship with women but only emotionally never sexually. His sexual needs are satisfied by men .

What im trying to say , Why is there a need to be seen as manly or to been as dominant? Do you guys not want people to see you as a soft person? I don’t know if you’ll understand this, im slightly illiterate lol

 

[Mike hung]

Is it hard for a heterosexual man to fit into the macho culture or standard definition of being a man . Such as being seen as a masculine figure , and representing dominance, ect.

I have heterosexual friends who act in public as the straight football players who are jocks . While in closed doors , they would act much more themselves. They will show emotions like actual human beings should , and have a totally new personality.

One heterosexual friend , a peer since elementary, outed me out of his internalized homophobia. After a few years after outing, he texted me to experiment, while he was with his girlfriend at the time. He will have a stable relationship with women but only emotionally never sexually. His sexual needs are satisfied by men .

What im trying to say , Why is there a need to be seen as manly or to been as dominant? Do you guys not want people to see you as a soft person? I don’t know if you’ll understand this, im slightly illiterate lol

I'm not sure what you mean by 'toxic masculinity' however I guess I would fit in to your category of masculine although I'm very open minded when it comes to sexuality and equality.
I guess you could class me as old school in some respect, I was brought up to work hard and play hard, not to tolerate shit from anyone and to go get what you want from life even if that means stepping on others to get there.
I've played contact sports all my life, ride motorcycles and drive great cars, I've always drank and gone out on the town with the lads. I've had numerous relationships, a few marriages and many children. I've also been part of the swing scene most of my adult life and been Bull to many couples, however I do what I do because I enjoy that lifestyle, not because I'm trying to fit in with anything or anyone.

 

[longstroke7]

Masculinity should not be defined in a rigid box, it should be fluid to encompass all. You are not less of a man if you enjoy pursuits that society has conditioned us to believe that only women should enjoy (like say, fashion or make up artistry).

I get so tired of dudes wanting to define what every man should behave like. Men are taught to repress themselves and it ends up leading to negative behaviors. We should allow ourselves to just be ourselves. If you like cars, cool. You like going to the gym, cool. You like ballet, cool. You like writing poetry, cool. Be yourself.

As long as you're not a violent ass hole that treats people like shit, all aspects of "masculinity" should be appreciated.