Train Your Bf To Fuck You Harder.

[BDYMD]

Hi everyone,

my BF has a nice fat and long dick, which is very pleasurable being fucked with. The only problem is that the whole sex is a bit vanilla - it's missing some power.

He's clearly the top and doesn't even want to talk about to bottom, but apart from having sex he is more on the sub side with me being quite bossy in the relationship. Sex-wise my perfect pick would be a dominant top with some horsepower, taking what he wants when he needs it. My BF gives me cute looks and rather politely asks if I wanna have sex instead of getting things going.

Before some smart people recommend to "just" talk to him about this: I don't want to address this straight away. I'm a bit scared that he's not into it and will feel bad forever knowing I want it rough and he just likes vanilla!?

Also, looking for a new BF is not an option. I had so many experiences with guys and apart from one ex-BF with whom the sex was amazing every single time I find it difficult to find a sexual partner who is a 100% match even when I'm single. And I would rather compromise on having good sex instead of very good sex to keep the relationship going.

Any ideas how to tease him into being more rough, to see if he likes it? Without being too blunt about it!? Like an angel in public and a devil in the sheets or however that saying goes.

 

[Brodie888]

A few suggestions, basically it's a way of creating distance while at the same time broaching the subject.

1. Watch porn together. Slip in a harder video and ask him what he thinks of it.

2. Role play. Make it a fun occasional thing. Put several paired roles in a hat and whatever you pick becomes the theme. Start off with vanilla ones then a few weeks later some rougher ones.

3. Nonsexual wrestling. Coax him into wrestling with you in bed. Resist enough to be a challenge but let him win in the end. Remember to make it fun and praise him with kisses etc.

 

[MancmanMatt]

It's possible he doesn't like it rough himself in terms of the actual fucking. I don't. I like slow sex with deep long strokes. If I do the whole pounding thing it feels like crap and I go soft. Not much I can do about that. Maybe he's the same?

This seems to be only half of your problem though. I might be a slow sex guy but I'll grab you by the shirt to pull you inside the house when you come round, spin you round, yank your pants down and shove my tongue up your hole before the door has finished shutting. Then shove my dick inside you, wrap my arms around your body, embracing you from behind, and only then whisper "Hi" into your ear. Devouring you came first.

I have spoken to a few bottoms who have complained that they are the ones that initiate sex and they'd like their partners to take a more active role.

I have also spoken to some people who have given the impression that if I greeted them at the door like the above they would not be impressed.

Men are different and sometimes frustratingly so.

See thing is when you're not here and I'm thinking about you I'm fantasizing about how I'm going to greet you and the things I'll do to you and how I'll be doing them. And then I aim to make those fantasies happen.

Presumably your boyfriend also fantasizes regularly about sex and doing stuff with you. Heck even if I'm lying next to a boyfriend I'll fantasize/think about coming on to him in a certain way before actually jumping on him.

Your boyfriend must have basic sex fantasies about you and what he's going to/would like to do to you right? Even if it's something as simple as you walking in front of him to pick up the remote control or something and your ass is just there looking all yummy in whatever you're wearing. And he thinks fuck yeah I wanna grab that ass and do stuff to it.

Well it's like well why doesn't he just do it? Right? You'd think he would. Pull your pants down grab your bum bite it gently, growl, throw you on the couch and go to town on that hole.

Would he not be thinking these things? I mean I obviously do. I can't imagine anyone not thinking these things.

This could be a way to approach it. Talk about having him act on his fantasies with you. Talk about what his fantasies are. Make it clear you aren't necessarily talking about some big bucket list thing like ten guys in a line and you suck them all off. You could almost enact something like I described above and wear clothing that really makes your ass pop, or wear something you know he likes your ass in. And ask him "so if I did this..." and you then walk in front of him provocatively. Turn your head and ask him what he's thinking. If he doesn't say very much give him a hint and say "So you're not thinking something like damn that ass is fine, I really want to reach out and..."

If he's like well yeah I wanna do that. Say to him well why don't you then? And hopefully he'll pounce on you and do it. Then next time he won't ask he'll just get the hint and do it.

Would he respond to that?

 

[MancmanMatt]

And I just looked at your gallery. For some reason I can't actually view the photos in it but I can see, what appears to be, your bum with you lying face down on a bed, as a thumbnail.

If that's your ass there's no way he isn't thinking about pouncing on it every time you walk by. I would be. You need to get him to act on those thoughts. And if he isn't thinking those thoughts, with that ass walking by, then I'm stumped.