Why do women think it helps to say their ex was too big?

[deleted19861241]

I mentioned this in another post and thought it deserved its own question... honestly trying to work this out.

I can't imagine there's any sort of female insecurity, where it would be helpful for a guy to not only tell you you don't compare, but actively emphasise how incredibly inferior you are and that would make you feel better?

To me, using cis male logic, it's like your man saying to you:

"My ex was so spectacular compared to you, that I used to hate all the attention she got from other dudes, and God that modelling contract took up so much of her time, sure she was incredible to look at but I got tired of it and could hardly handle her in the bedroom, I'm glad I'm with someone uglier now that noone else wants, and I can have less intense/extreme sex with."

At least in my brain, I can't see why a person wouldn't know that was harmful?

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

There's such a thing as too big. Imagine something stabbing your guts from the inside of your asshole while it's tearing it. Literally.

There's such thing as too big. Don't come at me with the stupid birth shit. That's an ignorant and fucking stupid comparison.

I have no patience for this bullshit. Inferior? Fucking stop. Size matters to you way more than it should. Therapy. Get some.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

Oh, and uh.... My boyfriend's exes were fertile with huge breasts and curvy figures. I'm sterile as fuck with small tits and no hips.

What's that about no equivalent for women? I'm a fucking feminist. I'm all about equality.

I fuck better than anyone he ever could because I'm me. Fuck outta here with insecurities. Not welcum

 

[deleted19861241]

Your pent-up rage, defensiveness, efforts to deliberately misconstrue my comments, pre-emptive attacks, and invalidation of the fact that women do not solely own body image issues, is duly noted.

I'm not denying the concept of too big. I'm saying its harmful and misguided to tell someone they're not only interior, but that someone else had too much of a good thing, to try to help them.

I didn't say women don't have body image issues. I said I don't imagine there's a body image issue where you would find it helpful for a partner to actively emphasise how much you are lacking compared to someone else and there was a scenario where that amplification of things would somehow make you feel better about your insecurity.

Anyway I could address the whole thing a line at a time, but it seems you're committed to misunderstanding me & being offended - and dont worry, you didnt need to tell me you're a feminist, you're just as toxic, blinkered, & easy to spot as incels.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

Fucking hilarious.

 

[Sentosa]

I think you got your answer, terrible analogy... moving on

 

[MickeyLee]

Yo, short round, take your SPH bullshit and kick rocks.

A 'too big' dick is not enjoyable. A 'too big' dick is not a complementary phrase. The expressed intent and sentiment is 'my Ex fucked like a piano flipping down a staircase. I enjoy sex with you much more on many levels'


I get that your broken brain dick connect can't understand 'too big.' And your post history makes is apparent that 'enjoy sex with you' are probably words you will never hear a woman express. But listen when women tell you something.

 

[MickeyLee]

Also. It's not women's job to sooth damaged men in a relationship. Unless we're talking a therapeutic relationship with a licenced and trained mental health professional.

 

[Holly Doors]

Too big? Not a thing in my book hunni but it is a real issue for some.

I'd guess your situation arose from insecurity and asking your partner how you compared to other partners in an insecure bid to prop up your ego or something, well you got your answer and at least maybe she was truthful or maybe she said that in retaliation to a dumb question.
Would you rather she lied, said you were her biggest peen ever ?
Then you'd just be stewing knowing she's lying!

 

[sweetlucky12]

I would just assume if she said “too big” she means it wasn’t great because he was too big. Some nights I don’t feel like taking my husband to the hilt and i keep a hand wrapped around the base of his dick so it doesn’t get too deep - so I guess on those nights he’s “too big” too.

(p.s. @hollydoors good thing it hasn’t been an issue for you given what your man is working with! *high five!)