Women, Dieting & A Late Diet Guru

[Scarletbegonia]

Dolly Parton is EVERYTHING! I've heard her use this line a few times in interviews and it always cracks me up: It takes a lot of money to look this cheap! I. LOVE. DOLLY. PARTON.

Now, staying on topic, this thread gave me an idea: How much coin someone could make if they took this "concept" of praying to lose weight to...praying for a bigger peen! A Large Peen Support Guru. Sure hope LPSG's acronym is trademarked, lol!

Imagine the haul you could make in a MegaChurch devoted to guruing and praying for a MegaPeen! Those evangelicals will line up by the millions I tell ya. Millions. You could have multi-services 24/7. Drive-thru services.

And then add in the issue that I've been reading about the anti-vaxxers who've gotten Covid-19 and now suffer from erectile dysfunction. You could have a Pray for a Stiffie services for them. Dear Lord, please have mercy on poor ol' Carl. Ever since he suffered the virus, his willy has gone wonky. Have mercy on his poor floppy.

Could be epic it tell ya. Epic.

Oh my g-d I’m in love with your brain.

 

[MickeyLee]

White Jesus. Black Jesus. Baby Jesus. Jumping Jesus.


Hung Jesus?

Communion wafers the size of pancakes, laced wit Viagra.

 

[EllieP]

Dolly Parton is EVERYTHING! I've heard her use this line a few times in interviews and it always cracks me up: It takes a lot of money to look this cheap! I. LOVE. DOLLY. PARTON.

Now, staying on topic, this thread gave me an idea: How much coin someone could make if they took this "concept" of praying to lose weight to...praying for a bigger peen! A Large Peen Support Guru. Sure hope LPSG's acronym is trademarked, lol!

Imagine the haul you could make in a MegaChurch devoted to guruing and praying for a MegaPeen! Those evangelicals will line up by the millions I tell ya. Millions. You could have multi-services 24/7. Drive-thru services.

And then add in the issue that I've been reading about the anti-vaxxers who've gotten Covid-19 and now suffer from erectile dysfunction. You could have a Pray for a Stiffie services for them. Dear Lord, please have mercy on poor ol' Carl. Ever since he suffered the virus, his willy has gone wonky. Have mercy on his poor floppy.

Could be epic it tell ya. Epic.

A big-haired blonde woman pastor could perform miracles simply by laying on hands. I'm going boat shopping.

 

[MickeyLee]

The Revelation and Renovation Hour of Power with Pastor Ellie.

Updating the curb appeal of home and soul.

 

[thirteenbyseven]

If anyone has aspirations to go into the God Biz, then they could take lessons from this 84-year-old bag of wind from Lubbock, Texas. Kenneth Copeland knows every trick in the book-- like exorcising demons from someone on-stage. It takes a lot of hoot-and-hollering, followed by a slap on the forehead of a supposed volunteer from the audience with unusually strong legs. At the stroke of "almighty God!!!" they will spring back with astonishing alacrity, unconscious, into the waiting arms of church members. Glory Hallelujah.

 

[Enid]

Nah, dude. While I grew up attached to christianity (catholicism) by force, I am especially distanced from it now. I would never use it to try and control my diet?!

(If anything, I might consider myself attached to hinduism via Swami Mukundananda, but that isn't really relevant to conversation. His teachings do indicate a push for veg/vegan, which I strive for but best I can do is pesc/veg vast majority of the time)

I personally just follow a diet that counts calories, carbs, sugars, pays attention to proteins and gets good source fats. I'm not always great. I have a big downfall with too much potato and wine.

Remedy? Exercise and keeping a journal. Document, document, document.

 

[thirteenbyseven]

Nah, dude. While I grew up attached to christianity (catholicism) by force, I am especially distanced from it now. I would never use it to try and control my diet?!

(If anything, I might consider myself attached to hinduism via Swami Mukundananda, but that isn't really relevant to conversation. His teachings do indicate a push for veg/vegan, which I strive for but best I can do is pesc/veg vast majority of the time)

I personally just follow a diet that counts calories, carbs, sugars, pays attention to proteins and gets good source fats. I'm not always great. I have a big downfall with too much potato and wine.

Remedy? Exercise and keeping a journal. Document, document, document.

And you make photogenic food too!

I've lost 5 of my 10 pound goal. A portion may may be water weight but my wife hates how easily we men seem to shed pounds.