Has anyone ever been with a women who's sexuality is the same as a mans? You know what I mean. Most guys will fuck anything with a hole. We do it for the sheer fun and enjoyment. Women seem to be alot more reserved about sex. When I was younger I had several encounters with what I call cougers. They could and would fuck me silly. Any position, or kink they had in mind. I had one who would fuck six times a night, another who ended up being a dominatrix and introduced me to ass play and pegging. Nothing against women but it seems it would be alot easier and nice if we were on the same page sexually. Women just don't seem to be as open minded as guys.
Womens Sexuality
- Thread starter merc41
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I don't know what guys you know but I would definitely not do anything with any hole.
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Sounds like these women who introduced you to ass play/pegging opened up your sexual world. The prostate can be quite the pleasure center for some guys. Like you. But not all guys. Like me. But that such sexual play does for you is terrific. Sounds like it's added a wonderful dimension to your sex life. But that's the point--YOUR sex life. One size does not fit all.
Kinda like how I know a lot of guys. Guys who have sexual relations with women. And most of those guys I know are a lot more discerning and selective about who they get with than you posit to be. So you might want to dial back the generalizations, as your "most" may/does not resemble others "most". Again, one size does not fit all.
I know a lot of women. Women who have sexual relations with men. And most of these women I know are discerning and selective in whom they choose to be with. But that in no way means that these women are more reserved about sex. Again, one size does not fit all.
Finding someone who's on the same sexual spectrum with a partner can be like hitting the lottery. But that doesn't mean those women (or men for that matter) who may not be into the same sexual proclivities as you are not open minded. Nope.
It just means that they may not be in to ass play/pegging. But they could be into something else that you might not find appealing. Sexuality is fascinating. What floats one boat may sink another.
If you seriously want to discuss such a topic, I'd suggest posting this thread where both men and women can respond and perhaps share their thoughts. I've yet to see women here be shy talking about what does float their boats. Unless you specifically don't/didn't want to hear from women?
'Seem' being the operative word I think.
Most woman friends I have or had were just the same. Playing the game a bit better, the poor guys mostly didn't even know that the girls decide he is going to chase them... ;-)
Also I'm aware of more ladies having an affaire and a lot less of them then the guys get caught.
Perhaps monogamy is overrated.
halcyondays
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It's not about being open minded or not. I know and have known many open-minded, sexually liberated women.
The first thing to consider is the difference between male and female reproductive systems. There's a relatively short window before and after ovulation when females are most hormonally driven to have sex. Outside of that some experience little or no desire and many experience lower desire.
Not men. Males produce 300-500 million sperm a day. Not once a month. Not once a year in a rutting season. Hormonally they are always on. They always want to have sex, always in the rut. The desire and the hormones which drive it never lowers except with advanced age. Evolution made males this way because males never know when an opportunity to mate will happen. They need to be ready when it does. Almost all normal healthy sexually mature females have the opportunity and ability to pass their DNA along. Males don't. They don't have uteruses.
This drives female mate selection in our species. Females are more selective than males--no surprise when they endure pregnancy and childbirth and do almost all the raising and nurturing of children while doing other work as well. It's the principal force driving women to select high social status males as mates. The more money a male mate has the greater chance her children by him will survive and produce progeny of their own. How often I've heard women compliment each other for "marrying well" and others lamenting the choice of a poor man.
Reproductive success for a women isn't having access to a man. We're a dime a dozen. With anonymous sperm donations a woman doesn't even need a man involved in the process. Nor is reproductive success getting pregnant and carrying a baby to term. Reproductive success for a woman is becoming a grandmother. It takes time and resources. Which male will provide best?
So many species die as soon as their reproductive years end. Ours doesn't. Grandparents live on for decades helping their children raise grandchildren. Again It increases the chance of reproductive success--passing on our DNA--which is a long term process in our species. Oh how my mother harassed me to marry and give her grandkids! lol... I never told her I donated sperm.
Males are instinctively less selective because they don't have a uterus. Females are instinctively more selective because they do. These behaviors, like most instinctual behaviors, are unconscious but many are reinforced by socialization and indoctrination. Most cultures/religions, for example, are overwhelmingly heteronormative and monogamous in the face of overwhelming evidence that not all individuals are hetero-monogamous.
That's the basic biology of why women and men are "not on the same page" as you say.
Long ago a girlfriend asked me why men are so horny all the time. I said, You know how horny you get when you're ovulating? She said yes. How long does it last? I asked. A week, maybe ten days, she said. Men are like that all the time, I said. Our hormones don't fluctuate.
Oh! she said.
The first thing to consider is the difference between male and female reproductive systems. There's a relatively short window before and after ovulation when females are most hormonally driven to have sex. Outside of that some experience little or no desire and many experience lower desire.
Not men. Males produce 300-500 million sperm a day. Not once a month. Not once a year in a rutting season. Hormonally they are always on. They always want to have sex, always in the rut. The desire and the hormones which drive it never lowers except with advanced age. Evolution made males this way because males never know when an opportunity to mate will happen. They need to be ready when it does. Almost all normal healthy sexually mature females have the opportunity and ability to pass their DNA along. Males don't. They don't have uteruses.
This drives female mate selection in our species. Females are more selective than males--no surprise when they endure pregnancy and childbirth and do almost all the raising and nurturing of children while doing other work as well. It's the principal force driving women to select high social status males as mates. The more money a male mate has the greater chance her children by him will survive and produce progeny of their own. How often I've heard women compliment each other for "marrying well" and others lamenting the choice of a poor man.
Reproductive success for a women isn't having access to a man. We're a dime a dozen. With anonymous sperm donations a woman doesn't even need a man involved in the process. Nor is reproductive success getting pregnant and carrying a baby to term. Reproductive success for a woman is becoming a grandmother. It takes time and resources. Which male will provide best?
So many species die as soon as their reproductive years end. Ours doesn't. Grandparents live on for decades helping their children raise grandchildren. Again It increases the chance of reproductive success--passing on our DNA--which is a long term process in our species. Oh how my mother harassed me to marry and give her grandkids! lol... I never told her I donated sperm.
Males are instinctively less selective because they don't have a uterus. Females are instinctively more selective because they do. These behaviors, like most instinctual behaviors, are unconscious but many are reinforced by socialization and indoctrination. Most cultures/religions, for example, are overwhelmingly heteronormative and monogamous in the face of overwhelming evidence that not all individuals are hetero-monogamous.
That's the basic biology of why women and men are "not on the same page" as you say.
Long ago a girlfriend asked me why men are so horny all the time. I said, You know how horny you get when you're ovulating? She said yes. How long does it last? I asked. A week, maybe ten days, she said. Men are like that all the time, I said. Our hormones don't fluctuate.
Oh! she said.
To answer the question: yes, most of the women I've been involved with had similar sexual tastes to mine.
Why?
Because I communicated this shit before I hopped into bed. Why torture her and you with incompatibility?
I also agree with @MisterB that this thread should be posted where women can respond. I'm sure they can lend insight to this topic.
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I have found that by telling women I am bi that 1 of 2 things happens 1) They have no desire to go out with me. I tend to think they find out there is some competition and they feel they wont measure up. 2) We go out and we end up fucking very quickly into the date. They know I will get it with them or a guy so they might as well get some first.
I'm lucky to have married a woman that loves me to fuck her, she has never said no and about all I have to do is grab a hand full of her ass and she is ready. Neither of us has had to say the words, we seem to just know we are about to fuck.
I'm lucky to have married a woman that loves me to fuck her, she has never said no and about all I have to do is grab a hand full of her ass and she is ready. Neither of us has had to say the words, we seem to just know we are about to fuck.
I don't think it has as much to do with how women view/express their sexuality, and more to do with how women are looked upon in most societies for being that sexually active/experienced/advanced. In most cultures, men are celebrated for their sexual exploits, women are usually shamed for theirs.
If you were to get to know many of the women who seem sexually reserved or conservative, that they are actually quite a bit more kinky than you think.
If you were to get to know many of the women who seem sexually reserved or conservative, that they are actually quite a bit more kinky than you think.
- Reg,
When I was in my 30's and 40's pre grindr or tinder I met many women who were not adverse to casual sex with strangers they met in a bar. I spent 6 months in a hotel in Chicago and must of had sex with over 100 women most one night stands. Travel can be very stressful and sex is a damn good way to relax and get a good nights sleep. I assumed these women were just as sexual as I was. Looking for the release, looking for some companionship and really nothing long-term. I don't know how many were married, I never asked and most did not volunteer, it was "in the moment" kind of thing.
Just because a woman is selective about her partner/s doesn't mean she isn't a freak with the men she selects. And women who cast a wide net for partners may be quite limited in what they do with them. Human sexuality is a big tent.
Ill take it out of the realm of whats wrong with women in general and posit it more as a function of the women we choose to engage with in a romantic/sexual fashion...
We compromise...that's really it. Instead of being completely open and upfront about our sexual expectations and holding out for those who match it or leaving those who don't, we compromise for other parts of the relationship we find enjoyable, or for social/self imposed expectations of how we should behave in a relationship with others. But I think we tend to figure out quite rapidly, that a refusal to compromise is going to mitigate what opportunities are available to us, and as men are less ok with no sex being the only other option from as much sex as we want.
We compromise...that's really it. Instead of being completely open and upfront about our sexual expectations and holding out for those who match it or leaving those who don't, we compromise for other parts of the relationship we find enjoyable, or for social/self imposed expectations of how we should behave in a relationship with others. But I think we tend to figure out quite rapidly, that a refusal to compromise is going to mitigate what opportunities are available to us, and as men are less ok with no sex being the only other option from as much sex as we want.
Women want sex just as much as men do they may not have it as much at a given time that does not mean they don't masturbate or go out to bars/clubs for a one night stand.
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