Are men becoming more shy?

[new2day]

I do believe that many men and women are bombarded with images of the body beautiful on social media and magazines, or unrealistic porn bodies. No wonder many feel inadequate.

Growing up with communal gang showers and later going to nude beaches and naturist clubs, I've never had a problem. Yes some men have a bigger penis, but I've always considered myself as average and felt it's important to be seen by others and to be seen as unafraid of being naked; it might give others the confidence boost they need.

 

[23873261]

It's the inevitable consequence of societal tolerance/acceptance of non heteronormativity. There are gay and bi men amongst us and I suspect more straight men are as uncomfortable in being in communal nudity with them as a straight woman would be with men whom aren't even attracted to her. The male gaze of men is palpable and we as modern straight men largely aren't looking to be the willing fuel for another guy's erection.
Not that I would ever suggest it, but if some social imperative was put into place that separated changing areas amongst sexualities like they currently do for gender, my guess is that communal nudity amongst straight men would return to a norm, and then all the introspection could be geared towards whatever level of nudity occurs in the gay rooms.

i can understand your point and it seems logical, but then another question comes to my mind, on beaches we see so many women wearing bikinis/thongs and they know very well that there will be so many unknown men (and women who may be lesbian) around them but those women don't seem to care much (and imo they shouldn't).. but it seems like men these days are more concerned (than women) what others might be thinking.. i mean we can never really guess what other people are thinking about us or how they are looking at us (unless it is very evident).. just thinking...

 

[Sagittarius84]

but it seems like men these days are more concerned (than women) what others might be thinking

Because for straight men specifically, but I guess men in general, what others think has an objective, often direct effect upon the things we tend to prioritize, socioeconomic competition and sexual selection. A woman that is appealing to the female gaze, or an unwanted male gaze, or even seeks said gaze, really has little to no consequence as per what her priorities might be outside of that. The prime source of concern in almost any construct stems from scarcity, and more men, I imagine of all sexualities, are finding their options and opportunities to be more scarce as the respective averages within almost all demographics of men are subject to more scrutiny and selectivity.

 

[Blueballs1979]

I'm bi so I'd like to say that in America the man has been feminized. I mean there are few males I'm attracted to but none of them are twinks (fem guys). Sorry I'm not very politically correct. I personally think a lot of the gay stigmas come from that. Maybe it's because I'm bi but I want a woman to be feminine and a man to be a man. But then again Ive never lusted over a man like I have a woman. Sorry if I got too off track. Aubrey Kate for the win! Hot fem girl with 6"natural prostate massager lol. Ok I'm saying to much.

 

[mickel2022]

Very sad to say, but yes men have become 100% shy

 

[matt1027]

My parents were both in the fitness world, so my sister and I grew up around men and women either naked or mostly naked around the house. Nudity was never a big deal, and I didn't mind changing in front of whoever because of what I was taught. It wasn't until later I learned how insecure most guys are about their bodies, and a lot of my friends were uncomfortable changing around me or showering in the locker room.

 

[Camille89]

That is a very good point. It's assumed there's a sexual motive or threat if someone gets naked in a change room.
As a nudist, these are topics of regular discussion among my friends. Aside from the perceived sexual threat, another reason young men won't get naked is because they think their penis is too small. All they have seen is what porn has to offer, and have not grown up with reality. From my days of school showers, and then being a nudist, I quickly learned that most men do not have huge penises.

porn but also high expectations!

 

[Janvier75]

I think back in the day men (atleast in the west) used to be more comfortable being in underwears or even naked around other men in locker rooms, dorms, washrooms, showers, etc. They even used to be more comfortable in wearing briefs/ bikini briefs/ jockstraps (for sports only) but in my opinion, today men have become more shy, they try to cover themselves more when around other men in gym/ dorms etc. They feel less comfortable in being naked around other men. Wearing briefs or bikini briefs is off the charts. I want to ask if you guys also have observed the same trend in men becoming more shy these days? if yes, What could be the cause behind the change in this trend? Also, it seems like women, on the other hand, have become less shy in clothing than they used to be back in the day? what do you guys think?

Yes, It's interesting how younger guys today seem way more uncomfortable with nudity in public spaces like locker rooms compared to older generations like the baby boomers. Back in the day, privacy wasn't really a thing like it is now, and men weren't exactly known for their modesty. I mean, older dudes grew up in a whole different world – they were in the army, skinny-dipped in swimming holes, and probably shared a bathroom with a bunch of siblings. For them, it was just normal life. Sure, there are always gonna be some guys who feel awkward undressing in front of others for various reasons, but for the most part, it was just business as usual.

 

[Camille89]

Yes, It's interesting how younger guys today seem way more uncomfortable with nudity in public spaces like locker rooms compared to older generations like the baby boomers. Back in the day, privacy wasn't really a thing like it is now, and men weren't exactly known for their modesty. I mean, older dudes grew up in a whole different world – they were in the army, skinny-dipped in swimming holes, and probably shared a bathroom with a bunch of siblings. For them, it was just normal life. Sure, there are always gonna be some guys who feel awkward undressing in front of others for various reasons, but for the most part, it was just business as usual.

Privacy is gone when cellphones and cameras are running the world.

 

[Naughty Teacher]

Overall, I’d say the culture is changing. When I was in middle school/high school, the showers were one large room with a showerhead every 5 feet or so. That seems way less common now.

 

[Acratopotes]

i can understand your point and it seems logical, but then another question comes to my mind, on beaches we see so many women wearing bikinis/thongs and they know very well that there will be so many unknown men (and women who may be lesbian) around them but those women don't seem to care much...

Yes, I think that is interesting. My impression, to date, is that if you go up to a stranger and tell them you think they're really hot and will probably think about them later, as you masturbate, you will get a much more shocked reaction and expression of horror from a woman as from a man.

Yet, if an attractive woman goes in a bikini to a well-populated beach or public swimming pool for an hour or so it is pretty much guaranteed that at least one of the men present will add her to his wank bank. Possibly it has something to do with how "in your face" it is.

Because for straight men specifically, but I guess men in general, what others think has an objective, often direct effect upon the things we tend to prioritize, socioeconomic competition and sexual selection. A woman that is appealing to the female gaze, or an unwanted male gaze, or even seeks said gaze, really has little to no consequence as per what her priorities might be outside of that....

I am not sure I understand this. Are you suggesting that if someone more senior from my workplace was to share open showers with me at a gym/swimming pool he would then decide that, based on my cock size, whether I am circumcised or the state of my public hair, that I either was or was not the person he was looking for to fill a new post, i.e. a promotion? Or that if I saw that one of the senior managers had a small cock that I would think it fine to tell him where to go? Surely dominance or not is more about behavior than what you look like naked?

Then, when it comes to sexual selection, many men like to think that women choose them for their bodies. That may be a part of the attraction but, by the time there is a possibility of a relationship, women seem to be assessing the whole man, i.e. personality, intelligence, behaviour too.

But, for all this, knowing, that some of the men in a shared space may be gay probably does have a bearing on how comfortable men are with nudity. When I was at school, and fewer gay men were out of the closet, there was speculation and the usual jokes about "backs to the wall" or "don't drop the soap".

The other thing that I don't think anyone has mentioned, is the anti-molestation training given to children. Of course, we want to protect children from being abused and, while we can think that being body shy must be inconvenient, it certainly isn't something that should trump efforts to eliminate abuse.

 

[Sagittarius84]

I am not sure I understand this. Are you suggesting that if someone more senior from my workplace was to share open showers with me at a gym/swimming pool he would then decide that, based on my cock size, whether I am circumcised or the state of my public hair, that I either was or was not the person he was looking for to fill a new post, i.e. a promotion? Or that if I saw that one of the senior managers had a small cock that I would think it fine to tell him where to go? Surely dominance or not is more about behavior than what you look like naked?

Dominance is indeed more than just naked appearance, but we naturally tend to pathologize the whys and the hows of dominance assertion when physical appearance and attributes come into play. A Napoleonic Complex is only that because we recognize differences in motivation between short men and tall men, even if they seek dominance in outwardly similar ways..so indeed depending on what they are looking for from a PR perspective how you look or purportedly look naked may be what determines you getting a promotion over someone else, and yes if a senior managers dominance, backed up by his mannerisms and height reigned supreme in the office, a revelation of a small dick may change his employees perspective drastically.

I've heard this is something considered heavily in the military, political and espionage world as well, men whom are cheated on, or are known to be the sexually submissive part of the their relationships are often overlooked or placed under heavy scrutiny when it comes to rising up in the ranks.

Then, when it comes to sexual selection, many men like to think that women choose them for their bodies. That may be a part of the attraction but, by the time there is a possibility of a relationship, women seem to be assessing the whole man, i.e. personality, intelligence, behaviour too.

I think that is a commonly projected assessment of women's sexual selection, that conveniently avoids the unflattering totality of how they mate and how they reconcile it socially. I think most men hyperfocus upon the physical component of women's desire, because the immediate consequence of which is most in line which our opportunistic sexual strategy. One could make valid arguments that mens personality, intelligence, and behaviors will get plenty of opportunities for relationships and sex, but the first and most non committal, and when women are typically at their most fertile goes to that small eschelon of men who bodies are lusted after. All of the the other benevolent traits that are projected to be sought after socially aren't typically appreciated until after the consequences of 1st dabbling in the primal urges.

 

[FrankieGuile]

I think back in the day men (atleast in the west) used to be more comfortable being in underwears or even naked around other men in locker rooms, dorms, washrooms, showers, etc. They even used to be more comfortable in wearing briefs/ bikini briefs/ jockstraps (for sports only) but in my opinion, today men have become more shy, they try to cover themselves more when around other men in gym/ dorms etc. They feel less comfortable in being naked around other men. Wearing briefs or bikini briefs is off the charts. I want to ask if you guys also have observed the same trend in men becoming more shy these days? if yes, What could be the cause behind the change in this trend? Also, it seems like women, on the other hand, have become less shy in clothing than they used to be back in the day? what do you guys think?

I don't think any such trend exists except for in the imagination of others. However, I do believe a distinct trend exists of men expressing their wish that other men would get naked more often in public places and attempting to body-shame those men into displays of nudity.