As a gay man,can you accept to have sex with a transgender woman and even get topped?

[freenjelly]

i can see myslef with a trans--i just cant see myself with someone that would lie to me about who they are --if one were to come up to me be ftm and wouldnt tell me until we got close to doing things then it be hard to keep the relationship going---as if you start a relationship with a lie---then what else are they willing to lie about then or during the relationship

1. Trans is an adjective, not a noun
2. It'd be a lie if he said he was cisgender, not if he didn't mention he was transgender

 

[LPSG Simon]

1. Trans is an adjective, not a noun
2. It'd be a lie if he said he was cisgender, not if he didn't mention he was transgender

This ^^ <3

 

[JopneJappa]

I think what Alldix meant was people should be open about their gender/sex identity from the very start. In real life, it's important for people to know whether others align with their sexual preferences before embarking on a romantic or sexual relationship with them.

 

[Blue027]

OK. So, the individual outwardly appears as a cisgender female? Then my answer is “no”. Now, if the person is a male, by all outwardly appearances, then “yes”. That is to say, as a 100% gay man I would have sex with a man who was formerly identified as a woman.

99%^

 

[deleted2604161]

I'm a gay man into gay men, dicks, and all.

 

[kyyle2020]

I think that more and more, sexual orientation and gender constructs as binaries need to be broken down, unpacked, and dismantled.

Both are a spectrum. If you're attracted to someone, you're attracted to someone. What you do with each other is all up to the people doing it.

Im sure there are plenty of guys who consider themselves gay because they like dick. Dick in their mouth, dick in their ass, etc... maybe the other partner's gender doesn't play into that as long as they have one. Boom that opens the door to all sorts of combinations and possibilities.

Same as how some gay guys like other guys, but if the other guy happens to own a vagina, and that's up for being part of the sex they have, then great.

The thing about sex and gender is that there's no wrong way to do it, so even though there are people who are really into the conventional categories for things, there are just as many who don't really care, or don't see it that way. There's no right and wrong way to do it, and those parameters only really matter to the people who do it, and how they want that to come into play with who / how they fuck.

Simply put for me (as a gay guy) I wouldn’t seek anyone who wasn’t a guy with a penis. I’m gay. I like dick, I like men. I have tastes and it’s personal. What I find attractive is my business and nothing to do with anyone else, unless we both choose to make it our business lol. It’s really simple, I don’t get why the need for the lengthy debates. Attraction can be different things to different people. Don’t demote gender and sexuality because we’ve fought a LONG time for equality.

 

[kyyle2020]

Don't think too seriously about it. Sexual attraction is based on preferences. If two people find themselves sexually attracted to each other, they shouldn't bother about age old definitions or stereotypes of who should like who. Although I will say that lately, Trans people and activists have been going a bit too far in calling out others. I am against transphobia like anyone but if a gay or lesbian person says that they don't feel sexually attracted to a Trans person and won't date them, it's not transphobia, it's just their sexual preference. You can't force your mind to feel attracted towards anyone, it comes naturally to you.

Anyone who is demanding someone be attracted to someone at their will is a sleaze and creepy. Simple as. You don’t choose what someone else likes or doesn’t, and what they do with their bodies. Why is this even a conversation? Genuinely bonkers and disgusting territory

 

[mitchie801]

1. Trans is an adjective, not a noun
2. It'd be a lie if he said he was cisgender, not if he didn't mention he was transgender

No. I’m openly gay. If an F2M individual doesn’t straight up present as trans and chose to deceptively present themselves as male to someone who is openly a male only attracted to males in an attempt at sexual contact, this is deceptive and not acceptable. This is no different than a very feminine male who “passes” as female and attempts to initiate sexual contact with an openly straight male.

 

[freenjelly]

No. I’m openly gay. If an F2M individual doesn’t straight up present as trans and chose to deceptively present themselves as male

Trans men ARE male. What you're experiencing is called cisnormativity. Try not to assume everyone is cis.

 

[kyyle2020]

No. I’m openly gay. If an F2M individual doesn’t straight up present as trans and chose to deceptively present themselves as male to someone who is openly a male only attracted to males in an attempt at sexual contact, this is deceptive and not acceptable. This is no different than a very feminine male who “passes” as female and attempts to initiate sexual contact with an openly straight male.

I think we all just need to be mindful of consent, of what each of us wants from one and other - albeit a partner or a sexual encounter etc. if we rattle it down to it we all know what we want and if you’re curious then give it a go, doesn’t harm to try as long as it’s warranted, consensual and doesn’t involve kids!

 

[kyyle2020]

Trans men ARE male. What you're experiencing is called cisnormativity. Try not to assume everyone is cis.

You’re talking about a very small group of people. So yes generally most people will be “cis”. You have no right dictating what someone finds attractive or who someone shags. None of your business. Why do you care what someone else wants sexually lol. I certainly don’t care what you wanna do

 

[kyyle2020]

Trans men ARE male. What you're experiencing is called cisnormativity. Try not to assume everyone is cis.

I do agree that trans men are male. However, I don’t want to get with all men just cos I’m gay. Some guys I will never be into, I don’t like younger than me for a start. Rules a lot out. My tastes are very limited

 

[JopneJappa]

You’re talking about a very small group of people. So yes generally most people will be “cis”. You have no right dictating what someone finds attractive or who someone shags. None of your business. Why do you care what someone else wants sexually lol. I certainly don’t care what you wanna do

I think freenjelly was just pointing out the use of word 'male' in post. So, imo should have used 'cis male' instead of just 'male'. But, yes I understand that in day to day life sometimes we may skip these nuances in our conversations.

 

[Amaethon]

Your post adds nothing to the conversation, next time just keep it to yourself.

You’re not a gay man so you have no opinion.

 

[c1omr]

You’re not a gay man so you have no opinion.

Ok Sis!

 

[aaea1]

it's ok to be pansexual, but if you're attracted to transgender people that's what you are - not gay

 

[freenjelly]

it's ok to be pansexual, but if you're attracted to transgender people that's what you are - not gay

If you're a gay man and you're attracted to trans men, you're still gay. If you're a gay man and you're attracted to trans women, you're most likely not gay.

 

[HornyUnicorn]

it's ok to be pansexual, but if you're attracted to transgender people that's what you are - not gay

Sorry, but your definition is off, unless you purport to be more authoritative on the English language than the Oxford dictionary:
pan·sex·u·al
/panˈsekSH(əw)əl/
adjective
not limited in sexual choice with regard to biological sex, gender, or gender identity.
noun
a pansexual person.
Whether you like it or not, trans men are definitely men. Although there are plenty of trans men I find attractive (not all obviously), I have zero sexual interest in any women, cis or trans. Like most men, I'm pretty sure, I can tell pretty quickly by glancing at a person whether or not I find him attractive, especially if he's not wearing a shirt. I do not need to see the person's genitalia in order to decide whether or not I find him attractive. Although there are other criteria, a muscular build is a definite turn-on, and breasts are a complete turn-off. Most straight men seem extremely interested in women's breasts, on the other hand.

I'm certainly willing to acknowledge that there are many gay men for whom penis appearance is important. Among most gay men I know, it's not the #1 thing which turns him on, however. I guess that for anyone who says he'd enjoy bottoming for a trans woman who hasn't had bottom surgery, for that person the penis would be the most important characteristic, I suppose. If this string is any indication, I don't think that's the case for most gay men. Not all men are bottoms, however, so some of us aren't that interested in penises. I can understand why some gay men wouldn't consider being with a trans men, especially if that man didn't have bottom surgery. I, however, would be happy to be hooked up with any of these men. If they didn't get bottom surgery, that would be an added bonus as far as I'm concerned:

 

[aaea1]

some of us aren't that interested in penises. I can understand why some gay men wouldn't consider being with a trans men, especially if that man didn't have bottom surgery. I, however, would be happy to be hooked up with any of these men. If they didn't get bottom surgery, that would be an added bonus as far as I'm concerned

again, it's fine if you're into whatever, but you're definitionally not gay if you're sexually attracted to vaginas

 

[lkpt14094]

For me, the short answer is no.