ArabicBottom
Superior Member
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2020
- Posts
- 263
- Media
- 0
- Likes
- 2,813
- Points
- 288
- Location
- Doha, Doha, Qatar
- Sexuality
- 100% Gay, 0% Straight
- Gender
- Male
As much as I like to bottom and enjoy SOME attention from a group, I have a tendency to hedge and clam up being focused upon. It's not just sexual scenes by any means, but any interpersonal interaction. I think I'd be happiest either as one of two bottoms "holding hands" taking on the group, or having a trusty friend handle the conversation about likes, dislikes, or wants. There have been too many times in sexual situations when I totally wanted something offered and refrained entirely out of anxiety/shyness. I'll argue my way out of things I actually want to do in order to avoid that sense of oncoming panic from being the focus of attention. It's an odd social hangup. I don't really have any sexual hangups, though I know what I do NOT want to do. I WISH I could handle a bound and taken situation, but I can't handle feeling trapped so it would have to be an illusion only. I panicked when a friend I trusted handcuffed me at Folsom Street Faire—if I can't do THAT then it's best I not push it. When I climb into a sling I first test out escaping the device—could be from living in earthquake country and my first few years in the heart of Tornado Alley.
I totally get what you’re saying. I was very shy and awkward as a teen (closeted and didn’t fully accept myself living in a very conservative environment) but as I grew up I became more outgoing and confidant in social situations. When it comes to gangbangs I’m in, I make SURE that I have someone there that I trust and to protect me if things get out of hand. Most times I don’t personally find the tops myself but it’s a person/people who I trust who bring their friends/acquaintances.