Degenerates??

[Apolo1998]

ok so, i only want to know what other people think about this topic. don´t you guys think that we have normalized having waaaaay too much sexual partners, i mean gays on twitter fuck sometimes 10 guys a week, isn´t it a little bit gross??

1. i´m 21, never done anal, and it gross me out guys having so many sex partners.
2. Of course, you do you, if you fuck a thousand guys a week that´s on you, but i wouldn´t have sex or date someone who has been around this much.
3. Am i a conservative in this case?

 

[malakos]

ok so, i only want to know what other people think about this topic. don´t you guys think that we have normalized having waaaaay too much sexual partners, i mean gays on twitter fuck sometimes 10 guys a week, isn´t it a little bit gross??

1. i´m 21, never done anal, and it gross me out guys having so many sex partners.
2. Of course, you do you, if you fuck a thousand guys a week that´s on you, but i wouldn´t have sex or date someone who has been around this much.
3. Am i a conservative in this case?

I largely agree with you, at least in spirit. I am broadly repulsed by the party lifestyle, and what it generally entails: "getting wasted" on the regular, anonymous sex with many different partners, playing fast and loose with risk mitigation, high harm potential substances, trashy music (and trashy aesthetics overall), general disregard for the serious, sincere, and wholesome side of life. I've been celibate for some time, and I'd much rather just have a platonic social life, and maybe at some point down the line cross paths with a wholesome guy I can carefully get to know, than go back to having to deal with dissolution that is so common in the dating (read: hookup) scene.

I identify as socially and culturally conservative. Given your post history, if you asked me to, I'd judge something in that vicinity is true for you as well.

That said, I wonder what you mean by "too much"? Too much by what standard? If you have a standard, do you really think it's something that would make sense to the general population? Or is not the case that our culture's moral orientation has already declined so far that there really is no longer any sense of a standard of what is decent conduct, perhaps save where it involves violation of consent?

 

[51arledge]

I am, oddly enough, in large agreement with the OP.

I don't drink alcohol any more, but even when I did I didn't enjoy the scene in gay bars. The circuit parties and the idea of getting wasted so that one can have sex without inhibitions disgusts me.

OTOH, I have been to a local bath house many times pre-Covid, and I've been to the local Korean spa many times. Still, it has been very rare for me to have sexual encounters with more than 2 people in a given week. I don't like anonymous sex.
I like chemistry and spiritual connections with the people I play with.

But I'm a contrarian in other ways as well. I am an avowed atheist and have been my entire adult life, but I'm more spiritual than almost every "Christian" I've ever known.
Most behaviors of most people seem incredibly shallow and self-serving.

 

[DiamondJoe]

Does it matter what you choose to do? So I've had sex with a lot of people and I mean a lot of people. I don't think that makes me degenerate per se.

I recently found out that Fidel Castro used to have sex with (usually) 2 women a day, at lunch and dinner and sometimes breakfast. I kinda tip my hat to that.

However, one thing I have noticed about the small percentile of those with a vast number of sexual partners is that they are frequently damaged; narcissists, depressives stuck repeating modes of behaviour and self-harm, blotting out pain, addicted, seeking endless validation or instant gratification, or just playing games. Most of them. Not all. So when someone says they've fucked a lot of people I quickly begin to wonder what's making them do it.

But.

I don't see a lot of sexual partners as a reason to think less of someone, any more than having just a few or even none disbars an individual.

I'd like to return to my original statement and say it's choice but, on reflection your "choices" and life is more than half chance, so...

*shrugs*

If it makes you happy...?

 

[OldFirm08]

ok so, i only want to know what other people think about this topic. don´t you guys think that we have normalized having waaaaay too much sexual partners, i mean gays on twitter fuck sometimes 10 guys a week, isn´t it a little bit gross??

1. i´m 21, never done anal, and it gross me out guys having so many sex partners.
2. Of course, you do you, if you fuck a thousand guys a week that´s on you, but i wouldn´t have sex or date someone who has been around this much.
3. Am i a conservative in this case?

Aaannnnd waay back in the 80's when gay boys didnt come out of the closet much,,,,they were busy fucking deep up asses over and over then too,and traveling across the globe,,, and guess what......HIV-AIDS took off and spread everywhere ,even to their hetero girlfriends and on it went. So yeah, seems a bit gross, selfish, and very irresponsible to me.

 

[Apolo1998]

I largely agree with you, at least in spirit. I am broadly repulsed by the party lifestyle, and what it generally entails: "getting wasted" on the regular, anonymous sex with many different partners, playing fast and loose with risk mitigation, high harm potential substances, trashy music (and trashy aesthetics overall), general disregard for the serious, sincere, and wholesome side of life. I've been celibate for some time, and I'd much rather just have a platonic social life, and maybe at some point down the line cross paths with a wholesome guy I can carefully get to know, than go back to having to deal with dissolution that is so common in the dating (read: hookup) scene.

I identify as socially and culturally conservative. Given your post history, if you asked me to, I'd judge something in that vicinity is true for you as well.

That said, I wonder what you mean by "too much"? Too much by what standard? If you have a standard, do you really think it's something that would make sense to the general population? Or is not the case that our culture's moral orientation has already declined so far that there really is no longer any sense of a standard of what is decent conduct, perhaps save where it involves violation of consent?

if he´s like me, 21, and i see he has had more than 10 "boyfriends" or more than 15 sex parters by the age of 20. that´s a huge red flag for me

 

[Apolo1998]

of co

Does it matter what you choose to do? So I've had sex with a lot of people and I mean a lot of people. I don't think that makes me degenerate per se.

I recently found out that Fidel Castro used to have sex with (usually) 2 women a day, at lunch and dinner and sometimes breakfast. I kinda tip my hat to that.

However, one thing I have noticed about the small percentile of those with a vast number of sexual partners is that they are frequently damaged; narcissists, depressives stuck repeating modes of behaviour and self-harm, blotting out pain, addicted, seeking endless validation or instant gratification, or just playing games. Most of them. Not all. So when someone says they've fucked a lot of people I quickly begin to wonder what's making them do it.

But.

I don't see a lot of sexual partners as a reason to think less of someone, any more than having just a few or even none disbars an individual.

I'd like to return to my original statement and say it's choice but, on reflection your "choices" and life is more than half chance, so...

*shrugs*

If it makes you happy...?

yes, but sometimes i feel like young guys like me are somehow lead to be part of that lifestyle. in social media, you feel like you are losing of something if you haven´t fucked 50 guys by the end of pride month. and this hook up culture makes it very hard to find loyal partners

 

[Apolo1998]

Aaannnnd waay back in the 80's when gay boys didnt come out of the closet much,,,,they were busy fucking deep up asses over and over then too,and traveling across the globe,,, and guess what......HIV-AIDS took off and spread everywhere ,even to their hetero girlfriends and on it went. So yeah, seems a bit gross, selfish, and very irresponsible to me.

yes, and gays in ancient times were better, because being gay wasn´t part of their identity, the were men first and if they happen to like guys that wasn´t what defined their persona. gays in todays world are useless

 

[malakos]

if he´s like me, 21, and i see he has had more than 10 "boyfriends" or more than 15 sex parters by the age of 20. that´s a huge red flag for me

Oh. You just mean for your own preferences. I thought you might be meaning it as a moral critique. I think you could viably do that, but it would require much more justification than just stating social/dating preferences.

 

[Apolo1998]

Oh. You just mean for your own preferences. I thought you might be meaning it as a moral critique. I think you could viably do that, but it would require much more justification than just stating social/dating preferences.

it´s also a moral critique but at this point in time, gays are treated as a protected group by many and they feel like no one should say anything about their lifestyle. so i try to at leat keep in my circle of friends people who are not obsessed with sex

 

[nailz]

This is something I've always wondered about but never really brought it up in a conversation because I'm mortified of being accused of stereotyping. I've always just assumed that the majority of LPSG posts like "I fucked 25 random guys in a public bathroom this week" were just totally OTT fantasy posts Is this kind of thing actually going on in the gay community?

I've done things like threesomes and swinging that the moral police would happily burn me at the stake for, and if society were to define a moral standard I'd probably come up pretty short But everything was with a totally clear head and only after taking every possible precaution and thoroughly vetting everyone involved.

Having sex with 10 partners a week (much less totally anonymous ones) is alarming to me regardless of who is doing it. But I'm not making any moral judgements, I just find it shocking from a health risk standpoint.
If that's what makes you happy in life then by all means keep doing what makes you happy. Life is all about managing risks:rewards and everyone has the right to decide for themselves the risks that they take, but please make sure you're fully aware of those risks and taking some precautions.

 

[Apolo1998]

This is something I've always wondered about but never really brought it up in a conversation because I'm mortified of being accused of stereotyping. I've always just assumed that the majority of LPSG posts like "I fucked 25 random guys in a public bathroom this week" were just totally OTT fantasy posts Is this kind of thing actually going on in the gay community?

I've done things like threesomes and swinging that the moral police would happily burn me at the stake for, and if society were to define a moral standard I'd probably come up pretty short But everything was with a totally clear head and only after taking every possible precaution and thoroughly vetting everyone involved.

Having sex with 10 partners a week (much less totally anonymous ones) is alarming to me regardless of who is doing it. But I'm not making any moral judgements, I just find it shocking from a health risk standpoint.
If that's what makes you happy in life then by all means keep doing what makes you happy. Life is all about managing risks:rewards and everyone has the right to decide for themselves the risks that they take, but please make sure you're fully aware of those risks and taking some precautions.

you´re a girl so you might not see the reckless behavior of young gays, like i do. i love sex, but i don´t like the idea of sleeping with people just out of pure lust. maney guys i´ve met talk about their sexual partners like they were pokemon cards. And again of course you can do whatever you want, but this cannot be the new normal, is not healthy, and in the long run is the reason why many old gays are single.

 

[4388301]

Erm. Just because my number is over a couple dozen means nothing as far as my ability to be loyal. I have never, ever cheated. Not even when I am stuck in a sexless relationship. All my promiscuous times have been when I was completely single or ethical/consent given to not be monogamous and the other people involved were not monogamous either.

People who cheat are going to cheat. People who are loyal are going to be loyal.

 

[Apolo1998]

Erm. Just because my number is over a couple dozen means nothing as far as my ability to be loyal. I have never, ever cheated. Not even when I am stuck in a sexless relationship. All my promiscuous times have been when I was completely single or ethical/consent given to not be monogamous and the other people involved were not monogamous either.

People who cheat are going to cheat. People who are loyal are going to be loyal.

i agree, but "a couple dozen" (?) is a red flag for me. what kind of sane person fucks their way through life?

 

[4388301]

i agree, but "a couple dozen" (?) is a red flag for me. what kind of sane person fucks their way through life?

Plenty of sane people. There is nothing wrong with having lots of sex. There is also nothing wrong with being more selective about who you sleep with. What is wrong and shitty is calling people who live a lifestyle different than yours degenerates and mentally ill, along with assuming they cannot be loyal.

You choosing to look for partners who have not had sex with many others? Great, do your thing and seek like minded folk. Is it not possible for you to do that without throwing shade and insults at those who live differently than you? Looks like you recently had a quasi-epiphany in regards to interracial relationships. It is not a big leap to realize you might be equally judgmental and mean about folks who choose to be more promiscuous.

After all, homosexuality used to be (and in some places still is) considered a mental illness... so get off your high horse regarding folks who are promiscuous but in an ethical way.

 

[DiamondJoe]

what kind of sane person fucks their way through life?

*raises hand*

 

[Apolo1998]

Plenty of sane people. There is nothing wrong with having lots of sex. There is also nothing wrong with being more selective about who you sleep with. What is wrong and shitty is calling people who live a lifestyle different than yours degenerates and mentally ill, along with assuming they cannot be loyal.

You choosing to look for partners who have not had sex with many others? Great, do your thing and seek like minded folk. Is it not possible for you to do that without throwing shade and insults at those who live differently than you? Looks like you recently had a quasi-epiphany in regards to interracial relationships. It is not a big leap to realize you might be equally judgmental and mean about folks who choose to be more promiscuous.

After all, homosexuality used to be (and in some places still is) considered a mental illness... so get off your high horse regarding folks who are promiscuous but in an ethical way.

i just gave my opinion about what i´ve seen is destructive behavior, if you feel pressed is not really my issue

 

[Apolo1998]

*raises hand*

whatever you say joe

 

[4388301]

i just gave my opinion about what i´ve seen is destructive behavior, if you feel pressed is not really my issue

Cool. My opinion is you're being shitty and judgmental about folk who dare/have the audacity to enjoy a life different than your own. Have the day you deserve

 

[Scarletbegonia]

I seem to be unable to do casual.
The last one? Married him and it lasted 14 years.

For me, casual isn’t fulfilling. Likely tied to my demisexual nature and strong need for trust and connection.

I had concern in the 80s because my guy friends were doing each other and strangers in the Rise of The Plague. We had figured out unprotected sex was spreading HIV, but the outlook and attitude was one of “we are going to die anyway.”
Many did.

Today, I dislike players of any gender, any sexuality. It has a stink of use.
Players are separate from casual or friends who boink.

overall, it’s the attitude that cheapens human life more than the poking in holes bit that turns me off.