FROM HOMOPHOBE TO HOMO
Chapter 21: From homophobe to homo (Part 2)
I probably dreamt of cocks and gay sex but I could not remember anything from my dreams when I woke up. I noticed right away that the little red light was on and that the cameras were recording again.
The livestream was back on.
I did not know what to expect.
Certainly, everything had changed: the world must have collapsed on itself, the walls must have replaced the floors, my face was certainly everywhere on the news. I mean, I had been fucked by another man!
And the worst part was, I had loved it! I was a freaking homo.
Maybe my dad was waiting for me in the living room, holding a baseball bat, ready to beat me up. I would not be the first fag he would have attacked this way.
I walked in the kitchen naked.
My homophobic father was not there and the apartment looked exactly as it did the night before. Robbie was there, stark naked as well, making breakfast.
The world had not stop spinning then.
"I thought you deserved a little reward after your performance from last night, bitch."
Robbie winked at me while preparing his omelette.
I was stunned.
Not because what he had said was not normal, on the contrary, Robbie calling me his "bitch" and acting as my "dom" was our routine inside the apartment.
But was he really going to act like nothing had happened!? Business as usual!?
"Robbie, can we talk? I..."
"Language, cunt." He snapped back at me before I could even finish my sentence.
He looked severely at the camera on the fridge. People were watching us.
I was not sure what to do next.
"Sir... I... May we speak? In private?"
I wanted to go in his bedroom, the only camera-free zone of the apartment. We needed to have an honest talk. What was happening was too crazy, we could not pretend anymore.
For the very first time in my life, I was ready to be upfront about my desires and sexuality.
"I don't think a conversation is needed. Go take a shower and clean-up your ass. I promised our viewers some good anal action today."
That hurt me. I did have emotions. Maybe I was a pussy after all.
I really thought that I had cracked Robbie's code but he seemed to think that what had happened between us did not make any difference.
I went bold.
"Will you fuck me again today, Sir?"
He froze on the spot. Just for two seconds though.
Had he already mentioned to our viewers that I was no longer a virgin? He certainly did not anticipate for me to say it out loud anyway. He probably thought I would have been ashamed of that fact.
Robbie smiled at me and finished his orange juice.
"Yes. I will fuck you again." He replied calmly.
A part of me was relieved that fucking was still on the table. Another part of me was hating Robbie's attitude. Damn.
I was acting like a teenage girl who just got dumped but was still holding on his pathetic boyfriend.
I did what I knew best, I followed Robbie's orders and went into the bathtub to wash myself. There, I tried to take care of my ass. I wondered what the audience watching must be thinking about me.
I showed my hole to the main camera.
The next couples of days felt very surreal. Even more surreal than usual.
Robbie would not leave his Dom Alpha character, and despite my frustration, I would not leave my sub role either, too worried to lose a chance to fuck myself on his dick again.
And his dick, I sure got plenty of occasions to take care of!
There was no barrier now. Everything was on the table.
A thorough blowjob in the morning after breakfast, sure! A dirty rim-job while Robbie was eating his lunch, of course! And finally, his dick buried deep in my ass in the evening, fuck yeah!
Although my hole was still hurting from the day before, I could not say no when Robbie felt like it was time to show the audience what I could do.
He looked at his stats right before fucking me. "12.789 viewers" He announced proudly.
First time he was mentioning any number to me.
The information was too huge for me to process and once again, as I was about to say something, (what the hell, I thought the website was very exclusive and private?!), Robbie shoved his horse-cock in my ass and I lost any will to oppose him.
Thirteen thousand people were watching him pound my ass? Who fucking cared!? It just felt too fucking good!
We tried another position this time. An idea of Robbie of course.
I had to downright sit on his dick to impale myself onto him. Now, I was the one being proactive in the fucking, I was doing most of the work while Robbie could sit back and enjoy the show.
He bred me again.
That time, he was gloating.
At least, he did not cry afterwards! I almost brought that up to get back at him -- humiliate him in front of our audience - but I decided against it.
I would not hurt him like he was hurting me.
Instead, and following a suggestion from a VIP fan, I farted the cum out of my destroyed hole and I ate it all for the subscribers. We received big tips when I made my infamous spunk bubbles in my mouth.
Overall, my first anal penetration on camera had been a hit. Robbie was very pleased.
In the forty-eight hours which followed my first sodomy, I only left the apartment once to go the gym. Robbie had approved of it since he was spending the afternoon with Carlos on his side.
There, I met with Jonathan again.
I had been trapped in the apartment and in my own head for so long that it felt like a breath of fresh air when John proposed that we exercise together.
I knew that he was very into me but I needed a spotter so I said yes.
Johnathan was going to the gym commando and his dick was dangling underneath his shorts, right above my head as he was spotting me. I had a nice view. Even flaccid, his cock looked heavy.
The ginger pubic hair made him somewhat unique.
We ended up spending a couple hours together and we left for the locker-rooms and showers at the same time. Needless to say, I no longer felt any embarrassment getting naked in front of a gay man.
We showered a foot away from each other. He also had ginger hair in his ass crack. I almost got hard. I tried not to glance at him too much.
"Want to go eat something?" He suggested while he was drying himself with his towel.
I was putting my jockstrap back on. I knew that Robbie was waiting for me at home. I was about to get fucked, again.
This time, he wanted to try to insert some dildos while his dick was already in my ass. I would be stretched even more. Double penetration.
"Sorry, I have other plans."
Jonathan looked disappointed but he smiled at me.
"Still not ready?"
"I... No, that's not it... I just really do have something else going on."
He was still stark naked in front of me. He scratched his balls.
"I'm the one being sorry. I understand you're not interested. I promise, I won't insist then. I hate gay guys who don't know how to respect boundaries."
He extended his hand and said:
"Just friends?"
I shook it.
"That's all good... To be fair, I would definitely have been interested if the circumstances were different."
How crazy was it for me to say that?!
Somehow, that statement seemed even more ground-breaking than getting fucked in the ass. I had just admitted to a guy that potentially, I could have dated him.
What the fuck?!
"Your loss." Johnathan said to finish up the conversation.
He was already checking out two black dudes walking in the locker-rooms.
Back home, the situation only got more tense with Robbie.
I (quite desperately) wanted his dick but there was something wrong with the way he was treating me. I was not referring to the fuck, - I was fine with being his sub -, but I was obsessing over our kiss.
He could not go from a passionate making-out session, back to humiliating me in front of an audience composed of thousands and thousands of people.
Have you noticed how I was getting better at not being a raging homophobe? I called our audience "people" instead of "queers" or "faggots".
Baby steps, as we say.
Anyway, after Robbie had shoved the XXL black dildo in my ass (hooray! I could take it now!) alternatively with his monster cock, I forced him to go talk in his room, away from the cameras.
"Fuck, Robbie. Can we cut the roleplay for two seconds?" I yelled before shutting the door.
"Connor, calm the fuck down! Have you forgotten that people can listen to us? You want to ruin everything?"
"At this point, Rob. I don't care."
"You don't care about our livelihood? We left the garage. This is all we got. We made this decision together!"
I tried to calm myself down.
I did not want us to fight anyway.
This was not the point, all I wanted was a genuine conversation.
"Sorry. Ok? I did not mean to lash out. I just did not know how to get you to fucking talk with me."
"We talk every day. We literally spend all of our time together."
"Not this. Not the roleplay. A real discussion."
Robbie sighed.
"You sound like a girl. I mean, you sound like a needy annoying woman."
"You should not be surprised then. I am a bitch after all. Ain't that what you're always telling me?"
That shut him up.
We sat down on his bed.
"What do you want? What did I do wrong this time?" He asked.
"Nothing. I'm not here to go after you. I don't want this to turn into an argument. I... I just think I should tell you how I feel. We should discuss about... like... about us."
Robbie started slightly shaking next to me. I think I had never seen him that uncomfortable.
"You don't want to say anything you will regret, mate. You don't want to lose me." He said slowly.
"Neither do you!" I snapped back. "You need me!"
"Bullshit."
I took a long deep breath.
For once in my life, I had to be the mature one. I had to talk about stupid feelings. Who would have thought?
"Robbie, I don't want to fight. But what is happening between us, it's not just for the cameras anymore." I tried to put my hand on his thigh. "Dude, you fucked me."
"Because you asked me to!"
"And because you wanted to! I did not force you to fuck my ass! I did not force you to kiss me God Damn it! You leaned it to kiss me first!"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
We stood up at the same time and we were back at yelling on each other. But I would not back down.
I was finally piecing everything together. Or at least, I thought so.
"For Christ's Sake, Rob! I will admit that I'm a freaking homo, right. There, I said it!" I shouted.
My voice was trembling.
"Good for you, mate. Not really a surprise though."
"But you! Robbie! Look at yourself in a fucking mirror! You don't think you have some self-discovery to do on your own!"
"What are you insinuating?"
"You've been planning everything, just to have me do sexual stuff for you! It took so much time for me to realize but fuck, every step of the way, you made me go further, and every fucking time, you were enjoying it even more, getting more turned on! You're just as gay as I am!"
"ENOUGH!" He shouted, clenching his fist.
I got scared.
He did look threatening.
I guess I should not have been too surprised. I had the same reaction when Robbie was the one telling me for the first time that I was gay. Thinking of which, I did even worse at the time, I had jumped at his throat. We had fought in the living room.
Again, it seemed like ages ago.
"Now you listen to me, faggot." He spoke, putting his hand around my neck.
As usual, we were both naked.
It gave this dramatic scene a somewhat erotic vibe. It was like the more any of us would scream that we were straight, the more we look like gay dudes about to have sex.
The irony, right?
"Robbie... Please..."
"You just admitted that you were a queer. Noted. What I did... When I fucked you, it was just to prove a point. Point proven. You are a homo and you have always been into me."
"Rob... Let go of me..."
I was choking.
"Now, I gave you the opportunity not to talk about this. I did not want to humiliate you any further. But you could not help yourself. You had to make a scene, to be a drama queen. Faggots always do that it seems. Well. There has to be consequences. We cannot keep on going on like this."
This was my worst nightmare and the reason why I had accepted to postpone this conversation for so long.
I was terrified of losing him.
Robbie let go of his hold over me.
I finally was able to breathe again.
"I... I don't understand. What does it mean? You want me to go?"
He sported a cruel smile.
"No need to go that far. For now on, I will simply consider you as any other gay bottom bitch addicted to me. I can use you sexually, but there is no way I will spend a single dollar on you when I know how bad you want this."
He grabbed his balls; He was talking about his spunk.
"Robbie... Please... Don't react that way."
"Consider my jizz as my preferred method of payment for your services."
I should have come up with a plan. The conversation had totally escaped me.
Robbie, once again, was holding all the cards.
"I won't get paid anymore? For the videos? For the freaking VIP access? For the thousands and thousands of fans watching!?"
I was panicking.
"Why would I pay someone when I could fuck him for free? I am a wet dream for any gay boy. I told you, thousands of them would pay just for a chance to spend an hour with me. But that's your call, Connor. You are free to leave at any time."
I looked at his beautiful dick.
FUCK.
I had become just one of his bitches.
Nothing more.
What was I supposed to do now?
[MORE TO CUM]
I hope you enjoyed this chapter, guys! Looks like it's not going that simple for Robbie to come to terms with who he is... Three more chapters to unfold this (toxic) relationship, and more! See you next week for more sex and more craziness.
