Posting newbie here from the NYC area.
My experience:
-Star Spa (Palisades Park NJ): as mentioned, it gets really cruise-y and frisky. The staff definitely knows what's going on. Though a couple of the latino attendants are outright hostile and seem to focus their verbal abuse on the older, plumper guys who go there which I think is f*cked up. All that said, the few times I went, there were some seriously sexy guys walking around. Im not talking model hot--but real working man types: beefy Italian, Latino, Russian. Last time I was there, I had a very intense moment with a Middle Eastern daddy in the steam room.
-Spa Castle (Queens, NY): another oft-mentioned establishment. I hesitate emphasizing how hot this place can be from an eye-candy perspective because some guys lately have been crazy indiscreet and reckless which is just gross. I know I sound like a scold, but the last two times I went some desperate weirdos were whacking off right in the open, which killed the semi-erotic vibe that made it so great - in addition to putting the management on high alert once the complaints rolled in. But if you can get here during the week before 6pm, it's still a very relaxing place and the staff doesn't police the steam room as much. All services Ive experienced have been totally legit.
-Premiere 57 (companion of Spa Castle): Much smaller version of Spa Castle. The layout is weird and the groupon crowd is ever-present. I've seen guys hook up, but the attendants are vigilant and check the steam room constantly. The energy here is weird. It's certainly not a place to hang and relax for a few hours.
NON-KOREAN
-Russian Turkish Baths (East Village): Sunday and Thursday are men only. Again, a nice mix of guys but they are SUPER zealous about checking the steam rooms and they will kick you out if they even suspect you are looking to hook up. A few years ago that wasn't the case, and I saw some things go down--but really, this is just a funky place to hang, relax, etc. However - some of the massage guys have been rumored to go the extra mile.
-Mermaid Spa (Seagate Brooklyn): Authentic banya in an area of Brooklyn that feels like Pripyat, Russia. Co-ed, no nudity but some really fine looking, quite massive Russian daddies come here. They hang and shoot the shit naked in the locker room, which is nice. But this is really for the authentic spa experience. One curious thing I will mention - Ive gotten several massages by their male massage therapist - a beefy (you guessed it) Russian guy. Though they were strictly professional, towards the end he always rubbed his dick on me in a very obvious fashion. I think he did this because he assumed it would turn me on and I would tip better. Which was usually the case. Ha.
CLOSED
-Spadium (Manhattan): this was a Korean spa near my office at the time on 33rd and 6th ave. They had a Men's Side with a couple of tubs, a dry sauna, wet sauna, etc. I would pop in here in between meetings just to soak and steam when I had a little too much to drink the night before. This was the first and, to be quite honest, only time that things got kinda crazy with a scrub guy. Their's was a good-looking, built somewhat older Asian guy. The scrub was given in a curtained off room and he used to go to town on my dick - soaping it, sucking it, jerking it, etc. I typically came twice during a session. My record was 3 times in under 45 minutes. Anyway - this place closed a few years ago.
If anyone knows of any other spas in the NYC area, PM me. Would be up for meeting and hanging at one of these places too (as mentioned, will be putting pics up but I'm a big, muscular guy - rugged, handsome, etc).