A discreet knock gave me the chance to pull my shorts back up as another security guard popped his head in. “Martha, you need to see this,” the man said.
“I’ll be right back. If this is some sort of prank...”
Oh well, it kind of was....but I’d had my fun, and realized I may have done something really stupid. Luckily, she was back in a flash.
“Okay, sir,” she said. “looks like we were misled. My apologies, but I had to verify you weren’t stealing.”
“I understand,” I said. “But you’re lucky I’m the forgiving type. If you’d called the cops on me for having done nothing but adjust myself discreetly, I’d probably have sued.”
her eyes narrowed and she leaned in to whisper.
“And if you’d gone any further, I’d call it in as indecent exposure.” Guess she was tougher than I gave her credit for. “A word of friendly advice: don’t let your ...luck...write checks you can’t back. You’re not the first big boy I’ve had to search. Just between us, I’ve seen bigger. But I gotta collect my kids, so like I said: you got lucky.”
Duly chagrined, I finished my shopping quickly, but when I got to the front, the line clerks were super attentive. Surely word hadn’t got round that fast? Judging my where Hunter the Cashier Associate was looking, maybe it had.
The trunk was filled and I was glad I’d sprung for the fancy cold bag — and I realized I’d probably need to hit the big warehouse store soon too. I pulled through the nearest drive through and ordered as healthy as I could, desperate to fill my belly now. Three grilled chicken sandwiches, no sauce or mayo, extra lettuce & tomato. Unsweetened iced tea.
I inhaled it.
When I got home, I did feel better. I opened the door and yelled for Sebastian to come help, and got the treat of watching him carry in a load of groceries.
“Damn, is that all?”
“Yeah, the other bags are new clothes. I had to trade up a size.”
He turned away, but I caught his ears reddening a bit. he was suddenly quite interested in organizing the freezer. “Huh,” he said, carefully neutral.
“Well, two, actually.”
oh, yes, I had him. The poor boy almost certainly popped wood, and now he couldn’t turn around without embarassing himself.
“So you are what, XL?” He said quietly.
“Nope! Double x!”
“Ffffff...”
“What?” I teased. “Funny thing, though, the security guard thought I was shoplifting. Turns out I just really needed new shorts. I never thought having a big package would be so much trouble,” I said, with all the innocence I could manage.
“Hah! Well, you can finish this, I gotta go pee,” he said, then spun around to dash past me.
Not before I saw the tented outline of his own pecker, though,
“I’ll be right back. If this is some sort of prank...”
Oh well, it kind of was....but I’d had my fun, and realized I may have done something really stupid. Luckily, she was back in a flash.
“Okay, sir,” she said. “looks like we were misled. My apologies, but I had to verify you weren’t stealing.”
“I understand,” I said. “But you’re lucky I’m the forgiving type. If you’d called the cops on me for having done nothing but adjust myself discreetly, I’d probably have sued.”
her eyes narrowed and she leaned in to whisper.
“And if you’d gone any further, I’d call it in as indecent exposure.” Guess she was tougher than I gave her credit for. “A word of friendly advice: don’t let your ...luck...write checks you can’t back. You’re not the first big boy I’ve had to search. Just between us, I’ve seen bigger. But I gotta collect my kids, so like I said: you got lucky.”
Duly chagrined, I finished my shopping quickly, but when I got to the front, the line clerks were super attentive. Surely word hadn’t got round that fast? Judging my where Hunter the Cashier Associate was looking, maybe it had.
The trunk was filled and I was glad I’d sprung for the fancy cold bag — and I realized I’d probably need to hit the big warehouse store soon too. I pulled through the nearest drive through and ordered as healthy as I could, desperate to fill my belly now. Three grilled chicken sandwiches, no sauce or mayo, extra lettuce & tomato. Unsweetened iced tea.
I inhaled it.
When I got home, I did feel better. I opened the door and yelled for Sebastian to come help, and got the treat of watching him carry in a load of groceries.
“Damn, is that all?”
“Yeah, the other bags are new clothes. I had to trade up a size.”
He turned away, but I caught his ears reddening a bit. he was suddenly quite interested in organizing the freezer. “Huh,” he said, carefully neutral.
“Well, two, actually.”
oh, yes, I had him. The poor boy almost certainly popped wood, and now he couldn’t turn around without embarassing himself.
“So you are what, XL?” He said quietly.
“Nope! Double x!”
“Ffffff...”
“What?” I teased. “Funny thing, though, the security guard thought I was shoplifting. Turns out I just really needed new shorts. I never thought having a big package would be so much trouble,” I said, with all the innocence I could manage.
“Hah! Well, you can finish this, I gotta go pee,” he said, then spun around to dash past me.
Not before I saw the tented outline of his own pecker, though,