Ok I’m Bi and moved to where I live now a couple years ago. In January I met who I consider my best friend now and we messed around a couple of times. I’m assuming he is at least bi because why would he want me sucking his dick or eating his ass you know? But I do know he likes girls too 100%.
The issue is he is a guys guy, he plays sports, has a conservative family and asked me to not tell anyone what we did and promised we’d never hurt eachother.
Well fast forward to recently we planned to go get drinks and watch football together. Met him and change of plans we went to a different bar and he said he was texting a chick he recently met. Right then I got uncomfortable and should have just said you go and we can hang out another time but I really wanted to hang out with him so I just went anyways. He even said we can just go chill here if you don’t wanna when I said I’ll just let you go hang with them. But we went anyways.
I’ll just admit it now I think I have feelings for him or am starting to. At first when we were messing around it was just fooling around but we talk to each other almost everyday even if it’s just a text here and there.
Anyways we go there and we meet the 2 girls blah blah blah, and I’m standing there feeling like I’m 3rd wheeling watching my best friend and guy I must have feelings for talk it up with this girl. In his defense he wasn’t ignoring me he kept pulling me into the convo too but my feelings were really just crushed cause we plannned to just chill and watch football and then I’m here feeling like a 3rd wheel watching her rub up on him and flirt. At one point I got up from the bar and went outside to a fire pit area without saying anything and he texts me where I went. I said I’m gonna get a Uber back to my car so you can have fun with them man. He told me to chill. Downloaded the app was about to order a Uber back to my car and then realized why am I gonna leave ? Fck it so I go back inside and he waves me back over. I go over and the girl was like where’d you go? I made up an excuse I had to call someone. My friend knew exactly why I left and knew I was lying to her.
He says to me in front of them bro what’s wrong I said nothing ________ (his name) you know that feeling when someone asks what’s wrong and you feel like bawling that’s exactly how I felt. But I held it together. He was like bro I’ll leave right now. Which I thought was cool of him cause if I said yea he woulda left right there. But I’m not looking to do that to him. So I said no man it’s fine. So we stay for a hour or 2 and I’m just focusing on the football games at this point. But all this proved to me is that I have feelings for him and am clearly jealous.
Either way we all leave the girls hug bye blah blah we get in his car and he ask me what’s wrong I said nothing bro it’s fine. I’m pretty quiet when we driving back to my car and I feel tears going down my cheeks but I’m not audibly crying. I know he can see in the lights shining into the car since it was night. We get to my car and I say thank you again man and apologize for what happened. He asked again what’s wrong. I say again nothing and just start bawling in his car.
I told him while crying bro I thought we were gonna go chill and then I’m there third wheeling you on a date the whole night. He apologized a lot and said it wasn’t right of him to ask me to go there with him and we should of just went into the place we were going to go in earlier us 2.
He was really comforting and sweet when I was crying but I felt like I put a downer on his night. Either way I get out of the car and say bye and thanks again blah blah blah get In my car drive home.
Next day now that I’m not drunk and spillin my guts, I FaceTime him and apologize again ask how he’s feeling blah blah. He says bro u don’t gotta apologize.
Mind you before I FaceTimed him I texted him saying I wish I wasn’t bi which should have painted the picture to him that I like him I think no?
I need your advice and opinions. Knowing all of that should I have a convo face to face with him telling him how I feel and why I did that that night being jealous? Or do you think it will ruin our friendship or bond. We always said we could tell eachother anything but I don’t think he is comfortable coming out. And I think his plan is to be with a girl long term. That’s how I feel anyways
The issue is he is a guys guy, he plays sports, has a conservative family and asked me to not tell anyone what we did and promised we’d never hurt eachother.
Well fast forward to recently we planned to go get drinks and watch football together. Met him and change of plans we went to a different bar and he said he was texting a chick he recently met. Right then I got uncomfortable and should have just said you go and we can hang out another time but I really wanted to hang out with him so I just went anyways. He even said we can just go chill here if you don’t wanna when I said I’ll just let you go hang with them. But we went anyways.
I’ll just admit it now I think I have feelings for him or am starting to. At first when we were messing around it was just fooling around but we talk to each other almost everyday even if it’s just a text here and there.
Anyways we go there and we meet the 2 girls blah blah blah, and I’m standing there feeling like I’m 3rd wheeling watching my best friend and guy I must have feelings for talk it up with this girl. In his defense he wasn’t ignoring me he kept pulling me into the convo too but my feelings were really just crushed cause we plannned to just chill and watch football and then I’m here feeling like a 3rd wheel watching her rub up on him and flirt. At one point I got up from the bar and went outside to a fire pit area without saying anything and he texts me where I went. I said I’m gonna get a Uber back to my car so you can have fun with them man. He told me to chill. Downloaded the app was about to order a Uber back to my car and then realized why am I gonna leave ? Fck it so I go back inside and he waves me back over. I go over and the girl was like where’d you go? I made up an excuse I had to call someone. My friend knew exactly why I left and knew I was lying to her.
He says to me in front of them bro what’s wrong I said nothing ________ (his name) you know that feeling when someone asks what’s wrong and you feel like bawling that’s exactly how I felt. But I held it together. He was like bro I’ll leave right now. Which I thought was cool of him cause if I said yea he woulda left right there. But I’m not looking to do that to him. So I said no man it’s fine. So we stay for a hour or 2 and I’m just focusing on the football games at this point. But all this proved to me is that I have feelings for him and am clearly jealous.
Either way we all leave the girls hug bye blah blah we get in his car and he ask me what’s wrong I said nothing bro it’s fine. I’m pretty quiet when we driving back to my car and I feel tears going down my cheeks but I’m not audibly crying. I know he can see in the lights shining into the car since it was night. We get to my car and I say thank you again man and apologize for what happened. He asked again what’s wrong. I say again nothing and just start bawling in his car.
I told him while crying bro I thought we were gonna go chill and then I’m there third wheeling you on a date the whole night. He apologized a lot and said it wasn’t right of him to ask me to go there with him and we should of just went into the place we were going to go in earlier us 2.
He was really comforting and sweet when I was crying but I felt like I put a downer on his night. Either way I get out of the car and say bye and thanks again blah blah blah get In my car drive home.
Next day now that I’m not drunk and spillin my guts, I FaceTime him and apologize again ask how he’s feeling blah blah. He says bro u don’t gotta apologize.
Mind you before I FaceTimed him I texted him saying I wish I wasn’t bi which should have painted the picture to him that I like him I think no?
I need your advice and opinions. Knowing all of that should I have a convo face to face with him telling him how I feel and why I did that that night being jealous? Or do you think it will ruin our friendship or bond. We always said we could tell eachother anything but I don’t think he is comfortable coming out. And I think his plan is to be with a girl long term. That’s how I feel anyways
