Not Fearing Rejection from A Woman

[Lilyoftheghetto]

All of my life I have watched straight men fearlessly approach women in public, introduce themselves, ask for phone numbers, etc. And I have seen many of these guys just flat out rejected and sometimes humliated. What amazes me is how most of you immediately recover from the rejection and just move on to your next target. Gay men tend not to be the same. Many of us live in constant fear of being rejected by someone we approach and when it does happen many of us are very hurt and think there is something wrong with us. My question to straight men is how do you not take rejection from a woman personal? How do you get over it so quickly?

 

[cofrader]

It hurts...

https://imgur.com/9V0w0ws

But as tempting the dark arts where I choose to get better to communicate better.
Its the Schrödinger's cat until you ask you don't know, also is a matter of chance if on that exact moment scarlet Johanson become available i may have a chance, the window closes once she chooses and she would reject any others.
While being available she might reject by numerous reasons, she could be not ready or we could be on different pages.
I guess those that get burned and instantly are back on hitting learn something about this of or doesn't give dam about anybody.

 

[notthatguy]

Tp start with, it is a numbers game. If you don’t play you can never win.

 

[Sagittarius84]

There's a little confirmation bias and apex fallacy going on here. Stats show most straight men these days do not approach women at all, and one of the biggest complaints of straight women in the dating world is a lack of men approaching them like they did in days past.
I think the men who constantly approach are overrepresented And over-considered. I think most straight men are actually in the same, if not worse boat than gay men when it comes to the dating market in that women collectively(and vocally) pre-reject most men when given the most freedom and space to espouse their preferences, and unlike gay men, I don't think our probability of being rejected is as closely tied to how narrow our preferences may be, that I suspect is more the case amongst gay men.

 

[cofrader]

So nightclubs are the next blockbuster?
I guess if you were on a nightclub people were available for the less worse available, if people just use the app why anyone would buy overpriced booze and expensive entrance.

https://imgur.com/Hofdsn4

Baby don't hurt me... No more.

 

[derf3]

I endeavor always to be extra careful and considerate, before even approaching a woman. And so, for me at least: there is nothing more of a turn-off, than a lady responding negatively to that--to my trying to be civilized!

It hurts for sure.

Things of it is though: what can you even do? Be a jerk about it? Respond in kind? That is even less appealing. Frankly, I would hate myself; for turning into the caricature that, up till that point, they've only made me out to be.

In a situation like that, you just gotta get up and leave.

 

[Sagittarius84]

So nightclubs are the next blockbuster?
I guess if you were on a nightclub people were available for the less worse available, if people just use the app why anyone would buy overpriced booze and expensive entrance.

https://imgur.com/Hofdsn4

Baby don't hurt me... No more.

Worse actually...the picture almost perfectly encapsulates what the club has devolved to. What's worse is that because women primarily still seek outlets for consequence free debauchery, and male attention, the nightclub won't actually die...because even though the majority of men whom attend(and fund) clubs are still seeking sex and/or relationships, the vast majority of women present are not...but are willing to play the role for attention, access, and free drinks. It's borderline a slap in the face to men collectively, because women have been so vocal about how they would prefer to be unbothered in public spaces, only to be just as if not more averse to most men coming up to them in a club environment, despite the overpriced drinks and expensive entrance fees.
The nightclub, really the entirety of the nightlife scene in hetero world has become an entitlement for women to get any and all benefits that come with sexual attention, whilst simultaneously having no obligations or expectations put upon them for receiving such benefits/attention.

 

[Sagittarius84]

Tp start with, it is a numbers game. If you don’t play you can never win.

That's noble advice, definitely applicable on a wide scale in generations past....that I don't think really applies on average in modernity. I don't think the vast majority of men are looking at a "win" unless they are in the position to be the rejector, women's collective sexual selectivity isn't exactly generous towards men apt to be rejected.

 

[Sagittarius84]

My question to straight men is how do you not take rejection from a woman personal? How do you get over it so quickly?

I think this standard was established pre Internet revolution, mainly because optionality of sexual opportunity was fairly wide for the average man from post WWII to about the mid 90's. I think most sexual rejection from women back then was considered more on an individual basis, wherein today it's much more monolithic, ironically.
But as someone fortunate enough to have faced minimal rejection over the yrs, it was really easy to get over any individual rejection because there was always known interest in the back burner, partly because of demonstrably desirable traits/behaviors and partly because my sexual/romantic interest in women isn't strictly relegated those deemed my looks equivalent or higher. When you find a large swath of the female archetype attractive, the likelihood of being the potential rejector goes way up.