People with vaginas at bath houses or cruising male spaces

[Hung4HungNYC]

I don't think trans men should be excluded from gay male play spaces, but I do think they should have gone through the process of transitioning and present male. Having a female bodied person in a male space can be uncomfortable. I understand there are trans men who feel no desire to transition their bodies, and I affirm their right to do that, but I do think that play spaces are about bodies (since you have sex with bodies) not identities.

If one does not yet present as male or does not wish to present as male, but identifies as a man, my suggestion would be to find a place space designed around the broader queer community, where all types of people/bodies/identities are welcome.

 

[Topher the Gopher]

I don't think trans men should be excluded from gay male play spaces, but I do think they should have gone through the process of transitioning and present male. Having a female bodied person in a male space can be uncomfortable. I understand there are trans men who feel no desire to transition their bodies, and I affirm their right to do that, but I do think that play spaces are about bodies (since you have sex with bodies) not identities.

If one does not yet present as male or does not wish to present as male, but identifies as a man, my suggestion would be to find a place space designed around the broader queer community, where all types of people/bodies/identities are welcome.

*Gasp!* A fair, even-handed take on things! I may faint.

 

[curiosguy91]

Do i like seeing vaginas in the gay sauna. Not really. And a transguy with a vagina is sth that actually is a huge boner killer to me. however my personal attraction shouldnt matter really here beyond who i hook up with. So I wouldnt demand or want transguys to leave. I mean I am also not everybodies type if we throw the transguys out whats next all guys without a sixpack or under 8 inches? In the end if a transguy who is gay wants a safe space to cruise he is welcome in my book.

 

[magickhands]

What is your agenda? Are you trying to erase gay male identity or eliminate male only spaces for gay men?

Gay men deserve male only safe spaces. Especially in sexual spaces like bathhouses.

I am not attracted to trans men at all, but I accept them as my brothers. You do see them in bathhouses, but they make up a very small percentage of the men there. It is easy to decline them respectfully just like you would any other guy you are not attracted to.

On the other hand, allowing cisgender women into gay men's sex spaces is a bridge too far. Bi/pansexual/fluid women vastly outnumber both gay and bi men.

If they want to see naked men, there are plenty of hetero swingers spaces for them to go to. With exhibitionistic straight men who actually WANT their attention.

No need for them to monopolize gay spaces and let them sexually harass gay men who view them as boner killers. They think we should be flattered by their attention. We are NOT!

The way gay men socialize is different from how women and straight guys socialize. We sexualize our social spaces and socialize our sex spaces. Straight swingers places have strict rules in place to make women feel safe. They are not conducive to how gay men like to hook up. Keep them separate! Otherwise we just have a bunch of women or straight people policing gay men's sexuality. And that sucks, as they really do not understand us at all.