Sex Tips For A Top

[ravenx]

No, I think you’re not getting it. You said you’ll take your pleasure whether the bottom enjoys it or not. That’s sociopathic. And violent. And rapey. And yes, I know that isn’t really a word but it fits.

What I said is not at all associated with rape. I am stating a disposition in order to attract the opposite.

My post was intended for people like in post 13. I'm very clear in my language because I don't care if I offend some people in order to attract those individuals with opposite energy.

With all due respect, you have no idea who I am and you have no idea what you are talking about. I'm the last thing from a violent person. I didn't even fuck my current fb until the 5th date.

 

[LICNYCgay]

What I said is not at all associated with rape. I am stating a disposition in order to attract the opposite.

My post was intended for people like in post 13. I'm very clear in my language because I don't care if I offend some people in order to attract those individuals with opposite energy.

With all due respect, you have no idea who I am and you have no idea what you are talking about. I'm the last thing from a violent person. I didn't even fuck my current fb until the 5th date.

Whatever buddy. I just went back and read your original post, thinking maybe I misjudged. But I don’t think I did. But whatever.

However, in any case, the original poster was looking for advice on how to be a good top, and I think your description of how you operate, though it may work for you and the type of guys you hook up with, is not going to help this guy. Most guys don’t like to be treated like a subhuman by a guy who cares little or not at all about how they feel and what feels good to them. Sex is about mutual pleasure, and both partners should be looking out for the other.

 

[ravenx]

Most guys don’t like to be treated like...

Most people have a lack of passionate intimacy in their relationships.

So in a sense you are correct, I do not want what most people have.

 

[4097701]

As a selfish total top I only think about my pleasure when I’m fucking him and will keep him in whatever position feels good for me even if it’s worse for him, etc. There are certain limits to this of course. I don’t want to fuck him so hard that he taps out as that wouldn’t feel good for me or him, so if I sense he’s getting a bit overwhelmed then I dial it back a bit.

But I make sure he knows that his boypussy is there for my use and pleasure and that seems to make him more receptive to harder fucking.

sounds like sex is all about your ego... interested only in yourself... not a good fuck
usually when someone describes themselves as a "total top" instead of just top, it's a red flag that they are insecure and not comfortable with being a 'total gay'

 

[ravenx]

sounds like sex is all about your ego... interested only in yourself... not a good fuck
usually when someone describes themselves as a "total top" instead of just top, it's a red flag that they are insecure and not comfortable with being a 'total gay'

Another reply that just does not get it.

Interested only in myself?

Nah, my interest is pretty much solely on the person I'm fucking and how hot he is. And I let him know verbally how much he pleases me during sex. He loves that and it makes him feel appreciated.

 

[RowanB]

As a selfish total top I only think about my pleasure when I’m fucking him and will keep him in whatever position feels good for me even if it’s worse for him, etc. There are certain limits to this of course. I don’t want to fuck him so hard that he taps out as that wouldn’t feel good for me or him, so if I sense he’s getting a bit overwhelmed then I dial it back a bit.

But I make sure he knows that his boypussy is there for my use and pleasure and that seems to make him more receptive to harder fucking.

Well, you sure sound like an awful shag....
Think you'll find that most of us like it hard and rough and will gladly have you do whatever you want, but a little bit of respect goes a long way.

I don't fuck because i want to give the top an outlet - I fuck because I want my ass pounded. When top and bottom are on the same page and give a shit about the other person's pleasure, sex becomes a lot more enjoyable for both parties. A selfish shag is never a good shag.

 

[ravenx]

When top and bottom are on the same page

For the record one more time, just in case there's anyone else that doesn't understand this.

I never fuck anyone that is not on the same page with me. I don't fuck the first time I meet either.

I offered my advice in this thread because I am a fairly successful top and can pretty easily get good guys I want to fuck and do a good job from their perspective (at least from what they have told me).

Clearly a lot of people have not understood me however so I think I will retire from this thread now.

 

[4097701]

Another reply that just does not get it.

Interested only in myself?

Nah, my interest is pretty much solely on the person I'm fucking and how hot he is. And I let him know verbally how much he pleases me during sex. He loves that and it makes him feel appreciated.

yeah, you come off as a gigantic douchebag, sorry.. not saying you are, but your comments only point in this direction

 

[youngthirdleg]

On the topic of selfish tops, yes I have put myself through being fucked by those, I never felt I was being taken advantage. The important bit is I felt comfortable and could’ve got up and said no this hurts but usually if I enjoy the shape and size of the dick in me that’s enough sometimes. It’s all in the mind, if they are enjoying it, I enjoy it. Yes to earlier comments that the top needs to stay hard. Also passionate sex is good. Foreplay is good, rimming and oral usually get me going a lot.

 

[LICNYCgay]

On the topic of selfish tops, yes I have put myself through being fucked by those, I never felt I was being taken advantage. The important bit is I felt comfortable and could’ve got up and said no this hurts but usually if I enjoy the shape and size of the dick in me that’s enough sometimes. It’s all in the mind, if they are enjoying it, I enjoy it. Yes to earlier comments that the top needs to stay hard. Also passionate sex is good. Foreplay is good, rimming and oral usually get me going a lot.

The implication here, if I’m reading you correctly, is that passionate sex involves dropping concern for the other person and only concentrating on your own needs.

And I reject that notion. What happens if the passion is directed at your partner? If both partners are passionate about pleasuring the other, believe me there is going to be passionate sex with wild abandon. It’s just going to be two-sided instead of one-sided.

 

[youngthirdleg]

The implication here, if I’m reading you correctly, is that passionate sex involves dropping concern for the other person and only concentrating on your own needs.

And I reject that notion. What happens if the passion is directed at your partner? If both partners are passionate about pleasuring the other, believe me there is going to be passionate sex with wild abandon. It’s just going to be two-sided instead of one-sided.

No passionate sex I would say involves both people with concern for each other’s pleasures.

 

[LICNYCgay]

No passionate sex I would say involves both people with concern for each other’s pleasures.

Good man. My mistake. I misinterpreted what you said, then.

 

[geoffus21]

Thank you all for your comments. These have been, in the main, very helpful with just a little wobble in the middle.

Now just to address the perfomance anxiety of it all

Thanks again guys!

 

[Brodie888]

When it comes to sex, everyone is different and that's a good thing.

I personally like a top who is aggressive and dominating but that doesn't mean they are being selfish. It's actually the reverse, they go to great lengths to lavish their partners. Examples of this can be seen in most cocky boys scenes with Blake Mitchell or Austin Wolff.

 

[HungBtmVegas]

I think communication is a great top's #1 skill, but but also listening to and feeling my feedback. If he's pounding and I keep tensing up, a great top will slow down or ask me how I feel. If we're having a lazy fuck and I keep grinding back on it, a great top will take his foot off the brake and manhandle me. If you pay attention to his body language, it'll give you all the guidance you need

 

[BBB2.5]

As a selfish total top I only think about my pleasure when I’m fucking him and will keep him in whatever position feels good for me even if it’s worse for him, etc. There are certain limits to this of course. I don’t want to fuck him so hard that he taps out as that wouldn’t feel good for me or him, so if I sense he’s getting a bit overwhelmed then I dial it back a bit.

But I make sure he knows that his boypussy is there for my use and pleasure and that seems to make him more receptive to harder fucking.

Nothing wrong with being put in our place when in the submissive role. I like that you still observe the boundary of " to much"..

 

[LICNYCgay]

Nothing wrong with being put in our place when in the submissive role. I like that you still observe the boundary of " to much"..

While I like your contributions to these forums as a whole, I’m going to beg to differ with you on this one. And I suppose we’re all different and like and respond to things in different ways. But I don’t bottom in an effort to be submissive in any way. I bottom because it gives me the most intense sexual pleasure I’ve ever experienced.

I don’t need to be “put in my place” by an overbearing top. Ever. Just not my thing.

 

[BBB2.5]

While I like your contributions to these forums as a whole, I’m going to beg to differ with you on this one. And I suppose we’re all different and like and respond to things in different ways. But I don’t bottom in an effort to be submissive in any way. I bottom because it gives me the most intense sexual pleasure I’ve ever experienced.

I don’t need to be “put in my place” by an overbearing top. Ever. Just not my thing.

I understand that as well... Like you Im bottoming for my pleasure first. There have been a few occasions when I have submitted to my top guy for his pleasure. I only do this with guys who no when they are getting to rough and then back off. Which in turn gives me pleasure too... We all enjoy being bottoms for different reason... The main one is our own sexual gratification..