- Eez1,
About two years ago this new guy (Lets call him Bob) started working at my job. I start talking to him mainly just to be friendly. I quickly learn we share many hobbies, the same world views, humor, etc. After about three months, I decide to ask him out. Which I would normally never ask someone out that quickly, but I just lost my best friend (platonic) of 13 years to suicide about a month before Bob started. So I was in a lonely and in a bad head space, and to be honest Bob reminded me a lot of my late best friend. Anyway, Bob says no, okay, a bit disappointing, but he is completely cool with it and we remain friends. I assume he said no because he was straight. Over the following two years Bob and I grow closer, we work with each other three days a week, I take in interest in his hobbies, we hang out, we play video games together, we would call each other at least once a week when we did not see each other that day to catch up (those calls lasted 2+ hours). We would spend an about an hour together after our shifts ended just hanging out and talking. He got diagnosed with type 1 diabetes during this time as well and I was there every step of the way to support him. I helped Bob out in so many ways money, advice, etc.
Also during this time, about a year and a half of knowing each other, we also grow more intimate. It started out as me putting my head on his should, to me grabbing his arm, to cuddling when we hung out, to me touching his thigh, scratching his back, rubbing his stomach, then his inner thigh, and eventually rubbing his dick through his pants. I ALWAYS asked for his consent to do these things, and he said yes, he expressed some concerns about it when it first started but we talked about it and he said it was okay. At first this was just me enjoying someone I deeply cared about enjoying some skin to skin contact, but I started to catch feelings for him again. I never told him about it because I did not want to weird him out but I honestly thought we were building toward a relationship with all the things we were doing. Because we weren't dating but the things we did together were defiantly not things just friends do.
About a month ago he came over to my place, I cooked us a nice meal, we play some video games, I ask if I can touch him (he says yes as he ALWAYS has) we start cuddling and about twenty minutes later I start rubbing his dick. about five minutes later he get an erection. This is the first time I knew he had an erection because all the previous times I touched his dick he was wearing jeans so it was hard to tell if he actually had a boner. He was wearing sweatpants so it was easy to tell he had an erection this time. After a short while of rubbing his dick through his pants I decide to actually reach into his pants and rub his dick that way (my hand inside his pants but still over his boxers) I am just lightly rubbing his dick, not like I am giving him a hand job. After a few minutes of this I decide to go all the way and reach in his boxers to actually touch his dick. He says no, I IMMEDIATELY stop and apologize. And take a break from rubbing his dick. And we just cuddle with my head on his chest, we both fall asleep for a little bit and when we wake up I start rubbing his dick again (over his pants) and I notice he had a boner just from us cuddling. So I reach into his pants again (over the boxers) and just enjoy his body. He did not cum or anything, I was not trying to make him. Eventually he leaves. We see each other at work the next day and it perfectly fine, laughing chatting, etc nothing weird.
About two weeks ago he was sick so he calls off of work, no big deal whatever. He is off on Tuesdays and I work, after my shift I call him just to check up on him. Bob is hanging out with his two friends and Bob kinda ignore mes for a few minutes, but eventually he says to me "Sorry, I was talking to my friends." -- I say "About what." --"Oh about politics and my new girlfriend."
He went to his friend birthday party that Saturday and there was this girl there, they went to school together but in two years I have known Bob this girl has been mentioned ONCE. Bob says they talked at least once a month, but I dought that as Bob is always on his phone and I have never seen her name pop up in any sort of messages. Anyway they had that party on Saturday and they were dating by MONDAY (the day he called off work) but the thing is I was LITERALLY rubbing his crotch THE SUNDAY BEFORE they started dating like 12 hours before I was touching this mans cock.
We have had several conversations about it and to sum it up he basically says He never saw me in a romantic way (which HE NEVER MENTIONED) and, every time I touched his dick he was "uncomfortable" even thought I asked EVERY SINGLE time and he always said it was okay. It makes me feel disgusting and like a rapist. I feel very hurt how he is just giving all of his love to this distant friend of a girl he started dating after they talked for like twelve hours.
I am right to feel angry/upset with him? What are your thoughts? This is a shortish version of the situation but thats the gist, I can give me details if need be.
Also during this time, about a year and a half of knowing each other, we also grow more intimate. It started out as me putting my head on his should, to me grabbing his arm, to cuddling when we hung out, to me touching his thigh, scratching his back, rubbing his stomach, then his inner thigh, and eventually rubbing his dick through his pants. I ALWAYS asked for his consent to do these things, and he said yes, he expressed some concerns about it when it first started but we talked about it and he said it was okay. At first this was just me enjoying someone I deeply cared about enjoying some skin to skin contact, but I started to catch feelings for him again. I never told him about it because I did not want to weird him out but I honestly thought we were building toward a relationship with all the things we were doing. Because we weren't dating but the things we did together were defiantly not things just friends do.
About a month ago he came over to my place, I cooked us a nice meal, we play some video games, I ask if I can touch him (he says yes as he ALWAYS has) we start cuddling and about twenty minutes later I start rubbing his dick. about five minutes later he get an erection. This is the first time I knew he had an erection because all the previous times I touched his dick he was wearing jeans so it was hard to tell if he actually had a boner. He was wearing sweatpants so it was easy to tell he had an erection this time. After a short while of rubbing his dick through his pants I decide to actually reach into his pants and rub his dick that way (my hand inside his pants but still over his boxers) I am just lightly rubbing his dick, not like I am giving him a hand job. After a few minutes of this I decide to go all the way and reach in his boxers to actually touch his dick. He says no, I IMMEDIATELY stop and apologize. And take a break from rubbing his dick. And we just cuddle with my head on his chest, we both fall asleep for a little bit and when we wake up I start rubbing his dick again (over his pants) and I notice he had a boner just from us cuddling. So I reach into his pants again (over the boxers) and just enjoy his body. He did not cum or anything, I was not trying to make him. Eventually he leaves. We see each other at work the next day and it perfectly fine, laughing chatting, etc nothing weird.
About two weeks ago he was sick so he calls off of work, no big deal whatever. He is off on Tuesdays and I work, after my shift I call him just to check up on him. Bob is hanging out with his two friends and Bob kinda ignore mes for a few minutes, but eventually he says to me "Sorry, I was talking to my friends." -- I say "About what." --"Oh about politics and my new girlfriend."
He went to his friend birthday party that Saturday and there was this girl there, they went to school together but in two years I have known Bob this girl has been mentioned ONCE. Bob says they talked at least once a month, but I dought that as Bob is always on his phone and I have never seen her name pop up in any sort of messages. Anyway they had that party on Saturday and they were dating by MONDAY (the day he called off work) but the thing is I was LITERALLY rubbing his crotch THE SUNDAY BEFORE they started dating like 12 hours before I was touching this mans cock.
We have had several conversations about it and to sum it up he basically says He never saw me in a romantic way (which HE NEVER MENTIONED) and, every time I touched his dick he was "uncomfortable" even thought I asked EVERY SINGLE time and he always said it was okay. It makes me feel disgusting and like a rapist. I feel very hurt how he is just giving all of his love to this distant friend of a girl he started dating after they talked for like twelve hours.
I am right to feel angry/upset with him? What are your thoughts? This is a shortish version of the situation but thats the gist, I can give me details if need be.
