The biggest Holywood cock!

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No. Nobody asked him, he just did it on his own.

Just look at his dick. You get the impression, he, like a lot of guys that are hung( in our particular military environments), live for that shit.

I'd be lying if I said he was the biggest I ever saw doing that. It's skinner in person, from my memory, still I wouldn't throw him outta' bed for eating crackers.
 
WILLEM DAFUOE

Willem Dafoe | LPSG

thedreamsinsideme.tumblr.com: // willem dafoe dancing with his huge penis.
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Fuckin classic
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Willem Dafoe dancing naked.
(source) Nov 3 2014



Trigger Warning: 80's, uncomfortable amounts of flaccid penis, so much cocaine


He had to be on something to pull that dance off.
 
http://www.collegehumor.com/post/7010028/9-famous-people-you-didnt-know-had-mondo-dongs

1. Liam Neeson's Pecker Was So Immense It Looked Like a Water Bottle
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"He unzipped his pants and an Evian bottle fell out. It was insane!" - Janice Dickinson, witness to Liam Neeson's kingly shaft

That's a quote from a lady whose last name is Dickinson, so you KNOW she's pretty much THE authority on massive panguses. Anyways, apparently Mr. Taken has a hidden weapon bigger than most guns - a seriously titanic weiner.


2. James Woods' Penis Defies Biology
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Hey, pretty appropriate last name there, James, since apparently YOUR wood is SOLID. Mainly, big, though. Like, "long live the new flesh" big, but the "new flesh" in this case is his big-time pee-hose. Original LoveLine host Poorman once described it as "18 inches long" - and while that's medically-impossible (I hope), the general gist is that the guy from that episode of The Simpsons where Apu gets fired has a pretty sizeable pocket rocket.


3. Willem Dafoe's Dick Is "Confusingly Large"
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Willem Dafoe's terrifying goblin face isn't the ONLY weirdly horrifying thing about his body - his mondo dong is so unbelievably massive, he had to use a stand-in dick for nude scenes in Antichrist. Here's the exchange, per The L Magazine:

Interviewer: Hold on - you had a stand-in dick? You had to have a stand in dick for Dafoe?

Lars von Trier: Yes, yes, we had to have, because Will's own was too big.

Interviewer: Too big to fit in the screen?

Lars von Trier: No, too big because everybody got very confused when they saw it.

While most actors are stuck using stand-in dicks to exaggerate the appearance of their pathetically teensy dinguses (like Mark Wahlberg in Boogie Nights and also Transformers 4, probably), Dafoe actually had to get a stand-in dick so that his weirdly huge crotch-sausage wouldn't terrify audiences (assuming the rest of Antichrist didn't already terrify them, that is).

And the weirdest part? What actually happens with Dafoe's dick SHOULD be the terrifying part (here's a quick rundown if you haven't seen it and we sure as shit are not gonna link to a Youtube video of this) - his gargantuan twig 'n berries are mutilated in the most horrifying manner possible. But yet that nightmare-ish act of dick-torture isn't half as scary as Dafoe's actual chubster.

BONUS BONER FACT! Not only all of that, but Willem Dafoe has famously used his bodacious boner -- he was expelled from high school for shooting a porno. Also his parents had a room in their house pretty specifically dedicated for anyone in the family to go have sex.

4. Jon Hamm's Hamboner Is a Longjohn
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Source: thesuperficial
C'mon. Look at this shit! Look at it! Jon Hamm? More like Jon Sausage! He was named after the wrong meat, assuming all of our last names are meant to serve as metaphors for our genitals. How big is Jon Hamm's longjohn? So big that he literally had to demand people stop talking about it:

"Would you want people walking up to you and pointing at your d--k? I can't believe I'm still talking about this." - Jon Hamm, owner of a legendary peepee


5. LBJ Gave His Jumbo Pork Sword an Appropriate Nickname
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LBJ had an LBJ of his own - Long Boner Johnson (the J standing for the same thing is just a coincidence). Yes, the 36th President of the United States of America had a phallus so phantastic that even HE referred to it as "Jumbo." Not only that, but he was infamous for waving it around in public and hooting shit like:

"Have you ever seen anything as big as this?" - The 36th President of the United States of America, re: his Texan-style dangler

And he made use of it - apparently he was a more frequent philanderer than his predecessor, John F. Kennedy, a president known for his frequent affairs.

To date, no president has a peter as infamous as LBJ's. Sorry, all you Herbert Hoover penis fans.


6. Jay-Z's Humongo Peen Cannot Be Contained By Beyonce
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Nas' babymama Carmen Bryan has described Jay-Z's Big-D to be like:

  • a baby's arm
  • the neck of a giraffe
  • an elephant's trunk
Those are all some pretty big things - things way bigger than your normal, run-of-the-mill schlong. But what say Beyonce, the true arbiter of Jay-Z's giraffe-neck-esque boner? Look no further than her song Ego, which many have taken as a metaphor for Mr. Z's impressive weenus:

It's too big, it's too wide

It's too strong, it won't fit

It's too much, it's too tough

He talk like this 'cause he can back it up

Sounds like he's got 99 problems, and most of them are the fact that his dick literally won't fit inside his wife's vagina.


7. Rasputin's Creepy Mummy Weiner Looks Like A Footlong Alien
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Basically, he was the Jaden Smith of Tsarist Russia, except with a rockin' beard...and a gigantic dingleheimer.

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When Rasputin was famously murdered (through poison, gunshot, drowning, and being beaten, according to legend), his occult crotchmeat was apparently severed by the assassins. While it can never be 100% verified, the Russian Museum of Erotica claims to have Rasputin's chopped-off penis on display and preserved - where it stands at about 12 inches long, and hyper-gross looking.

8. Frank Sinatra Was Ashamed Because of His Colossal Wang
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"He only weighs 110, but 10 pounds is cock." - Ava Gardner, famed carnival weight-guesser

Ol' Blue Eyes had a lot more going for him than his mellifluous voice, his sparkling smile, and his mafia connections - the famous crooner apparently had one superbly bulbous trouser snake.

Apparently he even had to get special underwear made to hold in his whale-like willy. Pennies From Heaven? More like Penis From Heaven! That's a reference to a famous Frank Sinatra song, in case you weren't aware, except changed around a little so that his big ol' honkin' baloney pony was mentioned.

9. Huey Lewis Is Hip To Be Grande In the Crotch Hog Department
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You probably remember the name Huey Lewis from his myriad of 80s hits, because he was one of Patrick Bateman's favesies in American Psycho, or some mixture thereof. But the REAL reason you should know the man who brought us The News is because of his tremendous ding-a-ling.

Connie Hamzy, a legendary groupie, infamous/regular famous for having sex with innumerable rock 'n rollers across several decades, has been quoted as saying the following about Huey's Lewis:

"He's the biggest. I've always said he's the biggest."

More like the heart of COCK and roll is still beating (off, probably). That's the REAL power of love.
 
I see that Dafoe video has now been properly stretched in the vertical dimension. I guess the guy with the mic is also "confusingly large". The writer of that crap's celebrity goggles must be thick enough to stop a bullet. They're just people, and most of those "legends" are made up. There's no point helping 'em with that if they're not paying you (I'm sure they can afford to).
 

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I see that Dafoe video has now been properly stretched in the vertical dimension. I guess the guy with the mic is also "confusingly large". The writer of that crap's celebrity goggles must be thick enough to stop a bullet. They're just people, and most of those "legends" are made up. There's no point helping 'em with that if they're not paying you (I'm sure they can afford to).

Touché. Thanks for the freeze frame.
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Lots of these lists are subjective.

I have another round of Hollywood big penis gossip. This time the latest rounds include Orlando Bloom and Justin, what's his name, can't spell the last name.

Orlando I'd say is a nice / above average size. The Justin guy, I don't get all the fuss. He has a nice body but I wouldn't put him in a Hollywood's Biggest list when you size him next to the likes of Jon Ham, Liam Nissan. etc..
 
Here are a few more.

http://www.popdust.com/hollywoods-biggest-dicks-in-no-particular-order-1890092507.html?slide=pZflkR

Here they are, in no particular order…

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According to Tony Danza’s attorneys, a full frontal naked pic of the actor, fresh out the shower and showing off a mammoth man-piece, “has caused and continues to cause him distress.


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We only have David Cassidy’s word for it, but, according to the former teen idol, he’s packing some serious peen. He claimed in his memoir, C’Mon Get Happy, that his brothers called him “Donk” as in donkey, and that people have told him he is “blessed” in the trouser department
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Michael Fassbender's date's got her eyes on the prize. Michael's Fassmember made such a splash in the movie Shame that it was considered for a best Supporting Actor nomination. Prometheus co-star Charlize Theron said it best when she said Fassbender's "penis was a revelation" and she is "available to work with it any time."





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Australian singer turned British treasure, Peter Andre received an eye watering groin report from glamour model Jordan, who claimed her (now ex) hubby’s pork sword is the size of a large television remote
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Jamie Foxx displayed his donkey dick during a brutal full frontal scene in Django Unchained


980x.jpg


According to Popdust's Kiss and Tell Girl, John Mayer has been blessed with such an awesome hybrid of flexibility and large penistry, that he can give himself a blow job! Turns out his body is a wonderland! Congrats, Mayer Penis.

980x.jpg


Chris Isaak is also rumored to be so well endowed he can give himself a blow job

980x.jpg


Size really DOES matter when it comes to gay porn—hence, Simon Rex’s successful career back in the day

980x.jpg

No wonder Jennifer Aniston has a smile on her face these days—have you seen that jogging scene from The Leftovers?

980x.jpg


If anyone knows about peen it’s super-groupie, Connie Hamzy. She dished on Huey Lewis’ super-sized schlong during an interview with Howard Stern, claiming, "He's the biggest. I've always said he's the biggest” All hail Huey Lewis, Hollywood's biggest dick!
 
Here are a few more.

http://www.popdust.com/hollywoods-biggest-dicks-in-no-particular-order-1890092507.html?slide=pZflkR

Here they are, in no particular order…

980x.jpg


According to Tony Danza’s attorneys, a full frontal naked pic of the actor, fresh out the shower and showing off a mammoth man-piece, “has caused and continues to cause him distress.


980x.jpg

We only have David Cassidy’s word for it, but, according to the former teen idol, he’s packing some serious peen. He claimed in his memoir, C’Mon Get Happy, that his brothers called him “Donk” as in donkey, and that people have told him he is “blessed” in the trouser department
980x.jpg



Michael Fassbender's date's got her eyes on the prize. Michael's Fassmember made such a splash in the movie Shame that it was considered for a best Supporting Actor nomination. Prometheus co-star Charlize Theron said it best when she said Fassbender's "penis was a revelation" and she is "available to work with it any time."





980x.jpg


Australian singer turned British treasure, Peter Andre received an eye watering groin report from glamour model Jordan, who claimed her (now ex) hubby’s pork sword is the size of a large television remote
980x.jpg


Jamie Foxx displayed his donkey dick during a brutal full frontal scene in Django Unchained


980x.jpg


According to Popdust's Kiss and Tell Girl, John Mayer has been blessed with such an awesome hybrid of flexibility and large penistry, that he can give himself a blow job! Turns out his body is a wonderland! Congrats, Mayer Penis.

980x.jpg


Chris Isaak is also rumored to be so well endowed he can give himself a blow job

980x.jpg


Size really DOES matter when it comes to gay porn—hence, Simon Rex’s successful career back in the day

980x.jpg

No wonder Jennifer Aniston has a smile on her face these days—have you seen that jogging scene from The Leftovers?

980x.jpg


If anyone knows about peen it’s super-groupie, Connie Hamzy. She dished on Huey Lewis’ super-sized schlong during an interview with Howard Stern, claiming, "He's the biggest. I've always said he's the biggest” All hail Huey Lewis, Hollywood's biggest dick!
Nice work... thank you.
 
Jack Elam

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We all know what they say about guys with one eye! Well Jack Elam was no exception. Lets just say his thick uncut 17.5" cock took quite a few casualties in its day. Easy with that crotch cannon now Jackie Boy!
 
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