Top or Bottom and Why?

Top or bottomom

  • Top

    Votes: 212 22.5%
  • Bottom

    Votes: 404 42.8%
  • Versatile

    Votes: 328 34.7%

  • Total voters
    944
I once had dinner with a few gay friends. One was late. He had just come back from cruising the mall. He claimed it was the best place to pick up married guys. I was really surprised because this guy was a strict top. Why on earth would married guys want to go home with him, I asked? He replied, because there was something he could do for them that their wives couldn't -- fuck them!
 
This is a really good question and I never thought about the “why”. I would say, I’ve never actually enjoyed sex having been the bottom. After the sex I was always disappointed. When I’ve topped there has always been good feelings associated with it and an amazing cum. When I’m bottoming I’m thinking, when is this piece of meat (the man, not his dick…) going to give it a rest? I would compare it to a feeling of rape, although I’ve never been raped, so maybe it’s an unfair comparison. It’s not even to the point I dislike the feeling of being dominated. With bottoming, there’s just like zero sexual “action” going on for me.

With topping, it makes my dick feel very good and seeing the bottom gives me sexual pleasure. I could never top anonymously. I love to eat ass and the pyschique of a man so I think that plays into it.

To be honest though, I feel like I’m a “inverse” (like an incel) at the end of the day when it comes to sex. I’m not hot enough to attract many bottoms so when I go visit the gay sauna this weekend I’ll probably end up bottoming if no bottom wants me. Bad sex is better than no sex?
 
  • Like
Reactions: diver6
I thought about which I really prefer and am the happiest being - topped or bottomed!
When I first discovered there was more sex than wanking, being wanked or guys sucking me off my whole world changed. I was slowly introduced to that nice thing - sex! From mutual masturbation, frotting and cock sucking to being fucked and then fucking, even the joys of threesomes. Consequently I've never been curious about which way I am going to serve a partner once we get down to having sex, I've always been willing to turn the other cheek if that's what was required - or part cheeks and get my cock in. Being versatile has its advantages, doesn't mean I don't have longings to screw screw and screw more or a strong desire to feel a hard cock thrusting deep I inside me - sex, whatever position, is always enjoyable.
 
Ive been fucking my neighbour now for a good few months, I originally was a bottom but I fucked him and now it's the only way for me, when I been fucking him in the sauna other guys have tried to finger me and screw me, but I'm like no way. I'm now a proper top :) eventually we will switch but I'm happy at the moment.
 
  • Like
Reactions: diver6
I've been both a top and a vers in my sexual career and I can give you answers to the why for both reasons.

When I was younger I was VERY curious about bottoming, but even more so about topping. When I did lose my virginity to a man (age 20) it was made abundantly clear to me by the guy I was with that I definitely had a big dick, and he explained to me I could expect a lot of attention in my life because of that. Now, I knew I was big before, but that kind of stuck with me, and suddenly it was lick a switch. I then was only interested in being a top.

Fast forward about a decade and I found myself single. Now I HAD bottomed (maybe twice) for my ex at this point, but it had lost its appeal. In retrospect it was all in the why / how I had been topped. Bottoming can be a vulnerable position, both emotionally and physically, and it hadn't gone well for me and I had lost my taste. However, in my early 30's I briefly dated a guy who was only a top. I didn't know that then. He did top me, and it was quite a positive experience, but nothing came of the relationship.

Fast forward and a failed marriage later, I found myself single, and dating. Never really thought about bottoming at all. Then I met my future husband. He presented as an absolute bottom, and hey, that fit my top card just fine.

Then one day several months into our burgeoning relationship and I found myself sucking him, and he very pointedly told me that if I kept it up, he'd top me. Now @Faunus is not small and I admit I was turned on by that thought. About a day later he topped me, and it was absolutely wonderful.

Since then I'm pretty firmly in the vers camp - with an emphasis on the top part of vers.

Why?

Because I've found that I do enjoy bottoming. However - caveat - is that it is (so far) only with him that I've bottomed. For me its a comfort level. I do want to explore my bottomhood a bit more - but so far I have not found anyone I'm comfortable with in that regard, because the husband has more than enough dick for me, and not many come close to us in size (at least in person). So - there is that as well.

TL:DR - Top or bottom, its because I enjoy doing it - both the feeling of being a top and being a bottom and the differences they bring to my sex life. Variety is fun!
 
With my first boyfriend, I was mostly bottom. I was very inexperienced and the first time bottoming took forever. A few months in, he asked me to fuck him, and once we got going I pounded him into the mattress. He asked for it again the next morning. I've been mostly top since then. The times I want to bottom are few and far between. I had a fuck buddy with a large cock, and some days I wanted to plow him, and others I wanted to let him plow me. At this point, it's been over a year since I had some cock in me and I don't really have any desire for it.
 
When you are in the middle of a threesome, and the rhythm, it's the most sensational feeling of being top and bottom and totally fulfilled. Face fucked and anally satisfied at the same time is a great second, so, no room to be just topo or bottom - you miss out
 
Top here, but not entirely by choice. Would love to be vers, but the gods had other plans...

Topping rocks. It's primal and powerful, and something about having another man "submit" to you in that way is just... *chefs kiss* Nothing hotter than a guy lifting his legs and asking for your cock

Mentally speaking, bottoming is an absolute rush. Honestly, just having a man in that position on top of you, even fully clothed, is crazy erotic. I love that sexual energy - that eager, almost desperate need to be inside you

It's a shame it doesn't really do anything for me physically... :oops:
My ass doesn't seem to do the "feel good" thing. The actual sensation feels less like sex and more like sticking your finger in your belly button. Not bad, per se, but not really good either.

I still do it now and again. Even though it's not actually pleasurable, it's great to beat off to

TL;DR The mind is willing, but the ass is not
 
This is a really good question and I never thought about the “why”. I would say, I’ve never actually enjoyed sex having been the bottom. After the sex I was always disappointed. When I’ve topped there has always been good feelings associated with it and an amazing cum. When I’m bottoming I’m thinking, when is this piece of meat (the man, not his dick…) going to give it a rest? I would compare it to a feeling of rape, although I’ve never been raped, so maybe it’s an unfair comparison. It’s not even to the point I dislike the feeling of being dominated. With bottoming, there’s just like zero sexual “action” going on for me.

With topping, it makes my dick feel very good and seeing the bottom gives me sexual pleasure. I could never top anonymously. I love to eat ass and the pyschique of a man so I think that plays into it.

To be honest though, I feel like I’m a “inverse” (like an incel) at the end of the day when it comes to sex. I’m not hot enough to attract many bottoms so when I go visit the gay sauna this weekend I’ll probably end up bottoming if no bottom wants me. Bad sex is better than no sex?
Finally, someone that have feeling like me, bottoming is like being raped, I just hate when watch top pump hard. Just wanna ask. like, do you like being treated the way you treated your bottom or not? It's just sensitive part of the body, it not designed to be treated like that, but becos of porn, bottom feels he deserves to be treated like that, or always be ready and accept to be treated like anything the top want
 
  • Like
Reactions: SoaringSpirit
Mood makes a difference, of course. If he's got a significantly larger cock, it kicks in my instinct to bottom. Also if he's taller or muscular. I get the urge to dominate when I have the bigger cock or the other guy is a skinny twink. When things are more even, I want to flip flop. Sometimes, though, I get the urge to top a bigger guy and pound his ass with my girth, especially if he's a taller, muscular guy, but has a smaller cock. Even if he's taller, muscular, and has a bigger cock, I feel like I want to top and pound his ass extra hard with my girth just let him know I want be dominated all the time.
 
  • Like
Reactions: diver6
Bottom here, and starting out as a top. So Ive been on both sides of the coin. Always thought bottoming was too girly...

Although I had fun as early on being a top once I finally tried bottoming what came naturally took over. Im not a submissive person by any means but the pleasure I get from getting fucked is undeniable. Once I found a way past the mental block pure ecstasy took over.

Im always insanely hard as the name suggests getting fucked. Ive cum so many times by having a dick inside me its just obviously where my sex organ is. And what it feels like cumming is so different than topping. It always took awhile for me to cum topping.

For a while I was versatile, probably cause I get hit up by a lot of sexy bottoms so Im like lets go but once I started hooking up with strict tops I realized pretty quickly I didn't miss topping.

As time went on and I a got completely comfortable being just a bottom, mentally bottoming just became more amazing. Im always horny for it. I cum every time sometimes several times. Its just natural!
 
Unlike most, I simply don't get off as an anal top, not with women or men. I'll do it on occasion, if my partner enjoys it, but with guys I'm a hungry hungry size-addicted bottom. The whole body orgasms I get from deep dicking are incomparable, and I really get off on the sense of accomplishment when a horsehung top is gratefully surprised at how much I gladly take, anally and orally. Years ago one guy in LA commented "nobody has ever been able to do that" and that etched itself in my DNA. I'm a bottom.
 
Because getting railed by a huge cock is my favourite thing to do. I love a big cock with some girth to really open me up good. I love the way my prostate gets stimulated from the inside and the way it feels to make a man so horny he wants nothing more than to blow his load inside me. And you best believe that’s where it goes if I have a steady partner. I love being filled with cum. Makes me believe I did my absolute best to please my top. I love being submissive and big dicks just make me so fucking crazy for it. I can handle them well too, it’s like my ass was just made for it. My hole takes a big one balls deep no problem. And I’ll tell you how much I love it too. Because I genuinely do love being filled up and feeling a throbbing cock in there. So yeah, I’m a bottom. I mean how could I not be when I see the big dicks on here?! All I want to do is worship them.