Wanting To Top When You’re The Bottom

[RG97]

I was wondering if anyone had experienced this or had any advice. I am “the bottom” in my relationship and don’t get me wrong, the sex is great and I love it. That said, I do have the urge to top from time to time. I did bring it up to my partner and although he was ok with idea in concept, he has never been willing to actually go through with it. He is very nervous about my size and if he could take it and also the fact he hasn’t bottomed for a long time. What would you guys advise?

 

[HOU_HEADHUNTER]

If he's bottomed before you might have a chance if you can convince him that you will take it slow. I'm sure you both know about using good quality lube so that it can make things easier. It's daunting for some people to bottom especially when they know that the person who will be topping them is rather large. The trust is already there since you two are already in a relationship so if things are not comfortable just stop and try again another time. The first few times maybe you could only put half in or even just the head which is also still enjoyable as most of the sensation is in the head anyway. Each of the following sexual encounters put a little more in until you are able to put the whole shaft in and just go very slow in the beginning. Eventually he will open up and you will be able to go a little faster. Communication is key. I would hope that he would be receptive to you wanting to experience something new that you haven't tried before. He may be concerned that you will enjoy it too much and will always want to top him.

 

[DiamondJoe]

It's a simple management maxim:

You shouldn't ask anyone to do anything you aren't prepared to do yourself.

 

[AVx22]

You have a dick, too! That’s the simplistic way to break it to him.

 

[dreamer20]

Turnabout is fair play. This is something you have permitted him to enjoy and he has experienced before. He shouldn't deny you this experience, but let you explore it with him.

 

[6270451]

I was wondering if anyone had experienced this or had any advice. I am “the bottom” in my relationship and don’t get me wrong, the sex is great and I love it. That said, I do have the urge to top from time to time. I did bring it up to my partner and although he was ok with idea in concept, he has never been willing to actually go through with it. He is very nervous about my size and if he could take it and also the fact he hasn’t bottomed for a long time. What would you guys advise?

How big are you? Sounds a dilemma

 

[RG97]

How big are you? Sounds a dilemma

Around 8/9”

 

[6270451]

Around 8/9”

Haha I can kind of see why he must be apprehensive! And how thick?

 

[Honey badger]

Might want to not call it top you.
The word can have agressive conitations to some people.
Perhaps say i want to be inside you.
Next do go right to dick .
Start with a good couple of ass play days rimming stroking and gentle fingering....kissing helps to make it closer..
Ease your way to more fingers .
The day you try penile penetration start with alot of ass foreplay body touching and kissing....let your boyfriend sit on your dick...that way he can adjust himself based on how he wants to pace it .
If he wants to stop DON'T look disappointed.
Restart the just the ass play again.
Also not all anuses are as pliable as others.
He might have had scar tissue from hemeroids or fishers....

 

[deleted1252710]

Did you ever discuss if he’s ever tried it in the past?

 

[RG97]

Did you ever discuss if he’s ever tried it in the past?

Yes he has done it before but not for a long time

 

[deleted1252710]

Did he go as far as saying he enjoyed?

 

[lexboy]

I didn't know where to say this but this thread was like barely almost similar in an opposite way lol.
But I'm a top and I don't like getting fingered, only have tried it myself a few times. But I often really want to bottom for guys I meet, but I get scared since
1. I do not enjoy getting fingered
2. I've never been fucking in the ass so it would hurt

Any of you have a similar experience? Like is there anyway to slowly start to like bottoming or enjoying fingering or something

 

[deleted1252710]

How did this go?

 

[RG97]

I didn't know where to say this but this thread was like barely almost similar in an opposite way lol.
But I'm a top and I don't like getting fingered, only have tried it myself a few times. But I often really want to bottom for guys I meet, but I get scared since
1. I do not enjoy getting fingered
2. I've never been fucking in the ass so it would hurt

Any of you have a similar experience? Like is there anyway to slowly start to like bottoming or enjoying fingering or something

I would say try it... I don’t like getting fingered at all but getting fucked is such a different sensation... yikes I could do with a good seeing to

 

[RG97]

How did this go?

Unfortunately we are separated due to travel restrictions in the pandemic so nothing yet

 

[deleted1252710]

Unfortunately we are separated due to travel restrictions in the pandemic so nothing yet

Oh sorry that sucks, you must be horny! Didn’t you bring up the conversation?