Why do you think more men are turning to sex work?

[swillboy]

Hi everyone, I’ve been noticing a rise in male sex workers and I’m curious to get this community’s thoughts on it. Basically:

1) men are increasingly voluntarily turning to sex work (only fans but also escort businesses) as a side job or even something more full time. Why do you think this is and do you think sex work is becoming more accepted as a profession? Are there drawbacks?

2) a lot of content is funded and catered to gay men but provided by straight men. There’s often talk of queer baiting. What does everyone think of this - is it problematic or simply paid performance?

id be curious to get your thoughts

 

[Clrwtrdlbud71-fl]

Man from what I hear (news, interviews, a personal friend/worker), the money can be insane, in enough cases way more than they would have relying on a college degree + x many years work experience: if a dude is chill with sharing his body in any way, how can he say no? I'm not saying it's easy money, but sure is MONEY!

 

[Sagittarius84]

I think the 2nd point is a numbers game as in there's really only a select few men that could make straight content for women and see any type of traffic, much less profit. If dating app data is any indication you're looking at less than 10 out of 100 guys that are actually considered attractive on sight, I can only imagine about 1 in 10000 will see a straight female fan base willing to pay. I think the unfortunate truth is queer baiting is the only way the vast majority of straight men can actually sell content.

 

[coolestguy]

Make sense. In general women are less likely into porn. If they want to make money, it's easier if it's targeted for men.

 

[theplayerking]

The Internet has made it easier and safer to do sex work. However, the Internet also lasts forever and could adversely affect future employment prospects.

 

[chancesare]

I used to feel bad when guys turned to sex work. I would think, "How sad that have to turn to that." After spending 25 years chasing happiness at work, moving across country to change industries, and learning that no matter what you do, every job just wants to suck every last ounce of energy it can from you for as little as they have to pay you . . . I say, good for them. Better to show your cock off online than to spend your life working every minute of the day for someone else who sees you as a commodity.

 

[Clrwtrdlbud71-fl]

I used to feel bad when guys turned to sex work. I would think, "How sad that have to turn to that." After spending 25 years chasing happiness at work, moving across country to change industries, and learning that no matter what you do, every job just wants to suck every last ounce of energy it can from you for as little as they have to pay you . . . I say, good for them. Better to show your cock off online than to spend your life working every minute of the day for someone else who sees you as a commodity.

Amen dude, amen!

 

[swillboy]

The Internet has made it easier and safer to do sex work. However, the Internet also lasts forever and could adversely affect future employment prospects.

Do you think that a employers would see sex work or evidence of it as a potential deal breaker still? I suppose it depends on the job field but I’m curious to know. My feeling is some employers would say it didn’t matter to save face but then never hire somebody who has done sex work

 

[ThroatCummer]

I used to feel bad when guys turned to sex work. I would think, "How sad that have to turn to that." After spending 25 years chasing happiness at work, moving across country to change industries, and learning that no matter what you do, every job just wants to suck every last ounce of energy it can from you for as little as they have to pay you . . . I say, good for them. Better to show your cock off online than to spend your life working every minute of the day for someone else who sees you as a commodity.

My entire life I said I would never pay for sex. That was so out of the realm of possibility in my life it is almost comical. I can easily get laid by just walking into a random bar and hitting on someone.

That is, until I found myself hiring escorts earlier this year. It was a combination of working 16 hour days building my startup and my personal life going to complete shit. Fast forward to May/June of 2022 last summer.

I wound up hiring someone. Then someone else. Finally, a third guy.

It turned out so amazing that I recently hired an escort to accompany me on a trip out of the country and had a fucking awesome time -- and he did as well.

I've completely changed my outlook on this entire industry. It's a business transaction, and I completely got out of it what I needed. I needed sex. I wanted someone completely out of my league. I also needed someone to talk to that isn't involved in my life and doesn't know anything about my background or my company and work.

That should also come with a disclaimer that the guys (or women) who do it on the side and have full time obligations and work are the best out there. The ones who do it because they need the money, well that can get really rough and it isn't good for them. In life, one typically gets out of something equal to the amount of work they put into it. I had a list of high standards and thoroughly vetted the guys before I hired them.

But yea, I have nothing but good things to say about sex work and have completely changed my entire view of it.

 

[theplayerking]

Do you think that a employers would see sex work or evidence of it as a potential deal breaker still? I suppose it depends on the job field but I’m curious to know. My feeling is some employers would say it didn’t matter to save face but then never hire somebody who has done sex work

It depends on the industry. I work in finance, which is pretty conservative and I know the background checks that my company runs include media and social media checks. I don’t know what they would do if something came back that a potential hire had done porn.

I worked at a law firm where the head of IT was extremely active in the leather scene. He competed in (and won) several major competitions and had some explicit and raunchy interviews on social media. It wasn’t visually pornographic, but he talked about fisting, watersports, etc. It didn’t seem to affect his career at all.

I also hired an escort once that was also an optometrist. He didn’t necessarily need the cash. He was just a horn dog that loved sex and did some escorting on the side when traveling.

 

[Sagittarius84]

Do you think that a employers would see sex work or evidence of it as a potential deal breaker still? I suppose it depends on the job field but I’m curious to know. My feeling is some employers would say it didn’t matter to save face but then never hire somebody who has done sex work

Yes, this has happened to countless number of women with OF accounts. Women are denied employment, housing, even acceptance to educational opportunities, because most of those institutions have some sort of clause in their handbooks that give discretion as to the type notoriety they want to accept as a part of their institutions. Men may fare a bit better because the occupations we choose tend be less humanities based or family oriented, but I'm not as familiar with the metrics for non heterosexual men and the occupations they tend to choose. My guess is if they track the same as their female counterparts, they're looking at the same employment issues arising.

 

[swillboy]

My entire life I said I would never pay for sex. That was so out of the realm of possibility in my life it is almost comical. I can easily get laid by just walking into a random bar and hitting on someone.

That is, until I found myself hiring escorts earlier this year. It was a combination of working 16 hour days building my startup and my personal life going to complete shit. Fast forward to May/June of 2022 last summer.

I wound up hiring someone. Then someone else. Finally, a third guy.

It turned out so amazing that I recently hired an escort to accompany me on a trip out of the country and had a fucking awesome time -- and he did as well.

I've completely changed my outlook on this entire industry. It's a business transaction, and I completely got out of it what I needed. I needed sex. I wanted someone completely out of my league. I also needed someone to talk to that isn't involved in my life and doesn't know anything about my background or my company and work.

That should also come with a disclaimer that the guys (or women) who do it on the side and have full time obligations and work are the best out there. The ones who do it because they need the money, well that can get really rough and it isn't good for them. In life, one typically gets out of something equal to the amount of work they put into it. I had a list of high standards and thoroughly vetted the guys before I hired them.

But yea, I have nothing but good things to say about sex work and have completely changed my entire view of it.

This is fascinating. Would you hire an employee for your company knowing they’d done sex work or had been an escort?

 

[swillboy]

It depends on the industry. I work in finance, which is pretty conservative and I know the background checks that my company runs include media and social media checks. I don’t know what they would do if something came back that a potential hire had done porn.

I worked at a law firm where the head of IT was extremely active in the leather scene. He competed in (and won) several major competitions and had some explicit and raunchy interviews on social media. It wasn’t visually pornographic, but he talked about fisting, watersports, etc. It didn’t seem to affect his career at all.

I also hired an escort once that was also an optometrist. He didn’t necessarily need the cash. He was just a horn dog that loved sex and did some escorting on the side when traveling.

Do you think then that there is a gender disparity (men are less affected)?

 

[NiceAnonGuy]

I found that ever since PREP hit the scene, this had made most guys fearless.

Before that, a healthy amount of men were petrified of sex

 

[zangulus]

I think sex work/nudes will with time become like tattoos where most everyone will have done it so it will not be a bar for employment, etc. But it will take a few generations. I mean to be honest most people below certain ages sent a nude by this point

 

[Thirdlegproduction]

As a sexworker consultant I have seen and talked to many sexworkers, male and female over the past 5 years and the number 1 reason is always ease of money but combined with validation seeking or just a way to explore their sexuality while staying in control of the interaction. Every one of them started out trying with low wage paying jobs and realized it wasn't ever paying enough to finance the life they want which isn't anything extravagant. They want to go to college without going $50k in debt. They want to have their own apartment without sharing the space with 5 roommates, they want to be able to travel and buy groceries and not worry if they'll be laid off next month.

I'd say, ever increasing costs of living and minimum wages not being enough to afford a normal life is what drives more people to sexwork.

 

[AceWilde]

I was a sex worker in the past, and I'm actually considering going into it again (doing porn this time). For me it comes down to wanting the extra money on top of what I get at my 9-5, and knowing that I enjoy sex and am good at sex, it's much more exciting then trying to have a part time job driving uber or whatever.

As to your second question about straight guys doing sex work and queer baiting, it can be a bit annoying to see happen. Especially since there are guys who will drop a LOT of money on a straight performer's onlyfans for irregular dick pics but won't support a gay performer who is doing hardcore videos regularly. But it was never really an issue with for me when I was doing escort work since fully straight guys aren't very likely to be doing what escorting clients tend to expect. LOL

 

[Mik864]

Hi everyone, I’ve been noticing a rise in male sex workers and I’m curious to get this community’s thoughts on it. Basically:

1) men are increasingly voluntarily turning to sex work (only fans but also escort businesses) as a side job or even something more full time. Why do you think this is and do you think sex work is becoming more accepted as a profession? Are there drawbacks?

2) a lot of content is funded and catered to gay men but provided by straight men. There’s often talk of queer baiting. What does everyone think of this - is it problematic or simply paid performance?

id be curious to get your thoughts

I think it’s just an evolution done by social media that make porn easier to access and somehow more private than when you had to go buying in sexy shops. Guys have lost the social disvalue of selling their body so they’re not anymore bound to the moral limit.
In my opinion the rise of sex workers goes on the same trend of social disparity: young kids have been bombed by Instagram “must” like holidays in Thailand or Dubai or Ibiza, French Caribbean, and they realize that life is so close to them (through people’s posts) and they can’t afford it.
So they start making porn.
Honestly I don’t think a sex worker is going to pay his university bills, mostly they waste their money in fancy cars and bitchy girls.
Many of them will get back poor as fast as they got money.

 

[hungblond]

It's not a way to get rich, unless you're looking to marry well. The same goes for porn.

Some guys can pull it off, especially if they have something to offer.

It can affect health, and long term work prospects depending on future plans.

Having an education and working in the business world before helps a lot.

It can serve a purpose, but it's important not to stay in it too long.

Most are not disciplined enough to do it long term. Living too large is not a good idea. Knowing how to work with clients is essential.

If you're doing it to support a drug habit, you need help.

 

[Mik864]

It's not a way to get rich, unless you're looking to marry well. The same goes for porn.

Some guys can pull it off, especially if they have something to offer.

It can affect health, and long term work prospects depending on future plans.

Having an education and working in the business world before helps a lot.

It can serve a purpose, but it's important not to stay in it too long.

Most are not disciplined enough to do it long term. Living too large is not a good idea. Knowing how to work with clients is essential.

If you're doing it to support a drug habit, you need help.

I’m not supporting any drug habit