Has a sex partner ever been surprised?

[antiquityscion]

This is for both F2M and M2F trans people.

Have you ever had sex with someone who didn't realize you were trans until you were both about to have sex? This could be intentional (you left that detail out for them to figure out) or accidental (you said it, or thought you were being obvious, they just weren't paying attention). If so, what happened? Did you have sex anyway, or did that person bail?

 

[MissThing]

I've always made sure that he knew up front. I have no desire to trick someone and frankly, it isn't safe. I can understand the fantasy that I've heard many men tell me about being surprised by what's under her skirt, but the reality is that her life and safety may likely be at risk for the surprise. It's a nice role play idea, but nothing more for me. He will know and I will make sure that he knows before anything happens, or most likely within minutes of conversing with me at all. When I meet people in general, I don't waste time mentioning that I'm trans. Anyone who knows me has to be aware of that because it's a big part of who I am and I, personally, like being distinctly not biologically female.

 

[MizzSummers]

100% agree MissThing. People often forget we aren't simply here for a fetish, we are people. Trans Violence is a huge issue and we have all heard stories of trans women being attacked or murdered when some people found out. So i think its best for us to be out there with who we are. Even those of us who are fortunate enough to have passing privileged, Its just better to be safe than dead. Also use being outwardly proud and open about who we are will help us become less of a fetish and more of an understood heard visible force in our communities!

 

[bigdaddydude]

I was the one who was surprised. I've always considered myself gay. I met my ex about 6 years ago in a gay pub. There was an 8 year age gap between us, I was the older. When we met he told me he was trans, I'd never met a f2m trans, that I was aware of & knew very little about the trans community. When he told me he was trans I took that as he had fully transitioned, he hadn't. He assumed I had cottoned on to not having fully transitioned. We saw each other a couple of times & on the third time of seeing each other we started having some fun at mine & we were fumbling about, I unbuttoned & unzipped his jeans, they fell to the ground. As I slid my hand into his briefs I started to say "I wanna suc....." when I realised he hadn't fully transitioned. He saw the look on my face & realised what had happened. We didn't go ahead with anything that night. It was slightly awkward for both of us. We managed to work through it & had a wonderful relationship, sadly though over time we both ended up wanting different things & we ended up splitting up about 18 months ago.