How to explain the phenomenon of dick size importance? do you have any theory why that matters?

[rope9839]

I always hear on this site, from women, that size doesn’t matter. However, I have heard maybe 4 or 5 times in my middle aged life, when a friend or member of our social group is has been mentioned as hung, the women have suddenly sprung to attention. Not in an, oh she looks interested way, but they say ”oh now I’m interested” , sometimes in front of their partners and once an ex of mine. The subject was changed pretty quickly by the men so never went any further.

Another experience: A friend of mine, very hung but not great looking had slept with a very attractive girl at his work. She would always contact him when drunk. He confided in a female friend at work what was going on and she said that it’s probably because of your size (he had slept with a couple of girls at work and this was the first he had heard of his reputation). He was very shy and extremely embarrassed.

Now there aren’t some fantasy stories, but true life experiences. I find it hard to believe that size is not something that is a huge factor, albeit only one factor in sexual attraction.

Any why is it a factor, I imagine partly just from an aesthetic point of few and probably because a big fat cock used properly hits nerve endings that a normal one doesn’t.

I think a lot of people saying size doesn't help have never been with an actual big cock. It's more they are used to 5 1/2 and the next guy has 4 1/2 and it was "fine." 8 is a different experience and rare enough that it's an uncommon one.

 

[Rooker]

It doesn’t matter in the same way that any physical attribute doesn’t matter. Also, guys care way more, so even if it does matter, it isn’t to the degree that most guys express. It is generally WAY down on the list of things they care about.

Kind of chalk it up to men and women thinking the other thinks like them.

Had an ex that was just physically incredibly good looking. She was engaged when we met, to a kind of techie geek looking dude. She was also cooler. It appeared on the surface level to be a mismatch as far as guys were concerned. Half the guys in our friend group assumed her fiance was hung like a donkey. The gals thought he had money.

Turns out he was just really fucking nice to her. They broke up eventually, but even then she thought he was funny.

 

[Rooker]

Trying to break up my novel.

I like fair skin, dark hair, light eyes, big boobs on a kind of ripped frame. I like ponytails and a sense of humor. I like kindness and intelligence. They all “mattered” to me when I assessed who to approach or date or sleep with. My wife has those qualities. But she doesn’t have the biggest boobs I’ve been with, nor the fairest skin.

I dated some brown eyed blondes. Even preferred their company to vampire looking brunettes (yeah it’s a fetish of sorts).

Guys seem to have this idea that a guy with lousy hygiene, not great looks, and a shitty personality is going to pull left and right if he has a big penis. Whereas MOST women aren’t going to give that guy the time of day even if they know he is big.

It may technically matter to some, maybe even many, but it’s way down on the list.

 

[equarian]

A larger penis legitimately feels better for women. Especially if the man knows what he is doing. That fullness feeling is hard to beat.

As sexual controls on women have loosened, they are more free to be honest.

But, size isn’t close to all that matters and most women are perfectly happy without a huge penis.

 

[ss7979]

Pretty much every woman has mentioned the same to me about just being generally attentive to their needs/desires and being a nice guy out of the bedroom - and rather dominant in the bedroom. Seems that is a recipe for success with most women.

But I do NOT agree that 98% of women don't care about the size. Almost the opposite! I find that the vast majority of them do appreciate when it's huge and pushing the limits of what they can take. Yeah, there are other things that matter more, but the excitement when they see/feel it is palpable, there's often a lot of "you're so big/so deep" type talk, and I've had several praise how much better a big dick is afterward. And come back specifically because it was hard for them to find a guy with a huge dick, especially one who was also all of those other things you mention (attentive, nice, etc.) The ones who truly didn't care about the size were rare exceptions.

I think most women care, but just not nearly as much as most men. I say it this way. 1/10 women don’t like huge dicks. 8/10 like huge dicks to some degree . 1/10 LOVE it and need it.


Men are different in that like 9/10 really want a huge dick.

 

[hzs3fg]

A larger penis legitimately feels better for women. Especially if the man knows what he is doing. That fullness feeling is hard to beat.

As sexual controls on women have loosened, they are more free to be honest.

But, size isn’t close to all that matters and most women are perfectly happy without a huge penis.

But surely there are limits to that, no?

A colleague, who I am very close with at work, tells me that she no longer has sex with her husband because his girth is just to much for her to handle comfortably.

In the other dimension, I'm sure that too long would also be uncomfortable unless the guy has great control and never, ever, goes in too deep.

 

[boycut92]

But surely there are limits to that, no?

A colleague, who I am very close with at work, tells me that she no longer has sex with her husband because his girth is just to much for her to handle comfortably.

In the other dimension, I'm sure that too long would also be uncomfortable unless the guy has great control and never, ever, goes in too deep.

This case illustrates why, for me, the issue of penis size is not a physical matter, but depends much more on personal preference or perception.

It is a known fact (and a pretty obvious conclusion) that a longer dick will reach deeper than a shorter one, or that a thicker dick will cause a larger stretch than a thin one. Whether this is a good thing or not, it depends on how the person taking the dick feels about it. There are plenty of examples of people (of any gender) who can't take dicks that are too big or thick.

Examples like that make me think that it is not correct to say "people prefer big dicks". It would be more accurate to frame it like "there is a range of penis size that is perceived as more desirable by most people". Small is often not seen as desirable by most, but too big is also not desirable. Believing that "the bigger the better" is a misconception that makes guys that are already well hung wish they had a huge dick that would not even be manageable/comfortable and, quite simply, would be less desirable than the dick they already have.

Perception plays a key role as well, because those preferences are not always based on experience. As a gay man, I feel attracted by big cocks, I get off on seeing them in porn and all. But in real life I've never taken anything bigger than 7" (which is already quite big). I do love the look of an 8" or 9" cock but honestly speaking I have no idea if I could take anything that big. When I see people claiming to love huge cocks, I wonder if they've ever taken an actually huge cock to know what it's like. There are plenty of stories about self proclaimed size queens who simply can't take a huge cock when they're faced with one.

Another aspect of perception that must be considered is people's ability to gauge the size of a cock just by looking at it. Someone might have great sex with a guy and believe his dick to be bigger than 7", but it's actually 6.5".

All that makes me think that it doesn't make sense to claim big dicks are just better, period. There's much more nuance to this than most people are willing to admit.

 

[kahlua123]

I think most women care, but just not nearly as much as most men. I say it this way. 1/10 women don’t like huge dicks. 8/10 like huge dicks to some degree . 1/10 LOVE it and need it.


Men are different in that like 9/10 really want a huge dick.

Exactly this, in spirit. I'd bet the amount who NEED a huge dick is closer to 1 or 2 in 100 though lol

I was known for being hung in a few social circles at a promiscuous time (years at a big college) and I only encountered a handful of girls who seemed to fit that description. The vast majority of girls were interested in trying a big dick or found out they loved it when they met me. But most didn't become obsessive about dick size, like some girls do.