It is very difficult to put aside your upbringing and socialization - to accept that what you thought / were taught growing up is not always true. As has been said above - coming out to yourself if often the hardest part.
My friend seems to be struggling with his sexuality but is too homophobic to accept himself
- Thread starter Adymoe
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bravesoldier
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So familiar. I believe many gay men are out there and don't want to be. Some never want to be and some, not at first. I didn't want to be for quite a long time, honestly. But after a wretched straight marriage (the sex was good though) years of being alone and gay porn coming back to my attention, I made the choice to have gay sex.
Anyway, cutting the chase I sincerely believe I know a guy like you have described. One who to me acts overwhelmingly homophobic and even though he may not realize it, shows it so clearly to a guy like me. I feel sure he heard at some point I was speculated to be gay, and as I can clearly see that's why he has always treated me like a terminal disease. I mean, the way he acts toward me is so evident it's not funny. On top of that, this guy has several, standout gay traits himself. He has a son who is gay too, which I'm not slighting at all. I understand the fear of homophobia, but it seems like a mature adult could rise above treating anyone the way he has treated me, being I've never been an oncoming threat to him in any way. I was even in a mentoring role to his gay son once and paid closer attention to him than anyone else to make him feel more comfortable.
Anyway, cutting the chase I sincerely believe I know a guy like you have described. One who to me acts overwhelmingly homophobic and even though he may not realize it, shows it so clearly to a guy like me. I feel sure he heard at some point I was speculated to be gay, and as I can clearly see that's why he has always treated me like a terminal disease. I mean, the way he acts toward me is so evident it's not funny. On top of that, this guy has several, standout gay traits himself. He has a son who is gay too, which I'm not slighting at all. I understand the fear of homophobia, but it seems like a mature adult could rise above treating anyone the way he has treated me, being I've never been an oncoming threat to him in any way. I was even in a mentoring role to his gay son once and paid closer attention to him than anyone else to make him feel more comfortable.
Yeah it's just sad to see what lengths guys will go to try and deny their sexuality to themselves and others. If only men weren't scared to be anything other than straight we would have way more guys sucking dicks than we do now lol
