The "how To Measure Your Penis" Guide

[Shepardson]

All the people worrying about the length of a dick or how you measure it are usually the smaller ones...who cares.

From observation, guys on the larger side usually become more obsessed with this stuff and about how they stack up against other big-dicked people. Smaller guys probably know they aren't in the running and don't care so much.

Also an observation- There's sort of an evolution to the (bullshit) measurement techniques. When a new trick shows up, it slowly spreads through the big dick scene. If they didn't care, they wouldn't be paying attention to any of that and they wouldn't all end up doing the same stuff in the pictures. They'd just stick a ruler on top and look down to see how long they were.

Take Care

 

[heyarnold123]

And the inner curve length too ..

Technically when you push something in you go only 1 direction, forward. So only the length pointing into that direction counts to measure the depth you reach

+1 for only measuring with a straight (hard) ruler. Also for a curved penis

This is only correct if you're inserting it into something as straight and rigid as ruler, then it does not follow along the curve.

Take a condom for example; if the condom is shorter than the outside curve length but as long as the inner curve, it would still be too short because the condom has to travel along the outside curve as well as every other side. Same thing goes for a hand, a mouth, a vagina, etc. They all move along the curve.

As for "depth", vaginas are not straight and rigid like rulers and will not ignore penile curvature.

 

[dickapick]

This is only correct if you're inserting it into something as straight and rigid as ruler, then it does not follow along the curve.

Take a condom for example; if the condom is shorter than the outside curve length but as long as the inner curve, it would still be too short because the condom has to travel along the outside curve as well as every other side. Same thing goes for a hand, a mouth, a vagina, etc. They all move along the curve.

As for "depth", vaginas are not straight and rigid like rulers and will not ignore penile curvature.

I am not sure if I understand correctly. Are you saying banana dicks should be measured along the inner curve because you wouldn’t be able to reach further? Just like the condom example?

 

[6505431]

Love this guide. I always find it interesting when guys say their measurement when soft. I know my dick varies completely when soft - doesn't it for most?

 

[Shepardson]

Love this guide. I always find it interesting when guys say their measurement when soft. I know my dick varies completely when soft - doesn't it for most?

Yes. Not only that, but I've never believed it could be accurately measured anyhow. The length is how far it sticks out off your body. If you lift up a real flaccid dick to get that, it scrunches up some. If it hangs down, it stretches (in addition to having no start point for the measurement). It's too dynamic for anything more than a rough estimate.

 

[Ninguem]

Up

 

[Franciscofixe2]

Good morning class!
Today’s lesson is about how to measure your penis!
While at first glance this might seem like an easy task, history has shown, that nearly everyone who attempted this challenge has failed miserably to provide an accurate result. Therefore, one must assume that there are hidden obstacles which prevent success in such undertaking. But don't be discouraged, because I'm here to help.

Using my skills in the advanced science of metrology I provided several example pictures to illustrate the Do's and Don’ts in penis length measuring. The complexity might be overwhelming at first, but I'm confident that it is possible for most if not everyone to master even such a difficult endeavor.

Critics might argue, that the scientific correct way to measure a penis is by pressing the ruler against the pelvic bone, which reduces deviations among test subjects due to variant thickness of belly fat. To those I respond: Get your fat ass off the couch and stop eating so much crap, if you want a bigger cock!

Where's the guide for curved dick guys ?
Many people have curved dicks

 

[Excelsus]

Where's the guide for curved dick guys ?
Many people have curved dicks

I was thinking about that, but since I don't own a curved dick, I would have to use a banana or something else. Also it would be somewhat complicated and involve calculations for it to be precise.
Maybe I will come up with something when I find the time...

 

[Snakebyte]

Where's the guide for curved dick guys ?
Many people have curved dicks

Exactly the same way. And before you complain I also would gain by measuring along the curve.

 

[Franciscofixe2]

Exactly the same way. And before you complain I also would gain by measuring along the curve.

Yhea I also gain, and everybody with a curved penis will also gain if they measure along the curve.

The thing is, I don't even know what's my real length because there's no procedure for curved dicks

 

[Snakebyte]

Yhea I also gain, and everybody with a curved penis will also gain if they measure along the curve.

The thing is, I don't even know what's my real length because there's no procedure for curved dicks

I rather meant that we measure the exact same way as everyone else.

 

[Franciscofixe2]

I rather meant that we measure the exact same way as everyone else.

I don't think that's the right to do tho. Imagine that you want to know the distance from one city to another. Because the route is not straight, you measure the distance along the curved of the road. Not a straight line from city A to city B.

 

[Snakebyte]

I don't think that's the right to do tho. Imagine that you want to know the distance from one city to another. Because the route is not straight, you measure the distance along the curved of the road. Not a straight line from city A to city B.

How does that matter? Do you stick a road into a pussy? The depth of penetration won't be the length along the curve. So yeah, even though I'd be better off measuring along the curve (the numbers don't make my penis bigger or smaller anyway) I think everyone should measure the same way. And if it's about comparison everyone actually has to measure the same way. And if it's about science everyone also has to use the same methodology. So after all it doesn't actually make sense to use a different way of measuring. Where do you draw the line? At what degree of curvature?

 

[Franciscofixe2]

How does that matter? Do you stick a road into a pussy? The depth of penetration won't be the length along the curve. So yeah, even though I'd be better off measuring along the curve (the numbers don't make my penis bigger or smaller anyway) I think everyone should measure the same way. And if it's about comparison everyone actually has to measure the same way. And if it's about science everyone also has to use the same methodology. So after all it doesn't actually make sense to use a different way of measuring. Where do you draw the line? At what degree of curvature?

The road was just an example...
I think that she feels the size along the curve.
I also agree that everyone should measure the same way.
And because there's no procedure for measuring curved dicks I asked.

 

[dickapick]

The road was just an example...
I think that she feels the size along the curve.
I also agree that everyone should measure the same way.
And because there's no procedure for measuring curved dicks I asked.

Yep. And when it is also thicker she might feel even more. But you don’t add girth to a length measurement do you?

So tell me why there should be a different procedure for measuring curved dicks?

 

[Scott8361]

I think a good way to measure the real length of any cock, curved or straight, would be to create a clear fleshlight with a measured scale on the outside shell.

Take your hard cock and slide it in as deep as you can, pressing as firmly as you could as if you were fucking... this should give you the "bone pressed" factor, too!

Then look at the measuring scale and see where the tip of your cock head reaches. That would give the real, honest, usable length of any cock, wouldn't it?

 

[deleted1547822]

I think a good way to measure the real length of any cock, curved or straight, would be to create a clear fleshlight with a measured scale on the outside shell.

Take your hard cock and slide it in as deep as you can, pressing as firmly as you could as if you were fucking... this should give you the "bone pressed" factor, too!

Then look at the measuring scale and see where the tip of your cock head reaches. That would give the real, honest, usable length of any cock, wouldn't it?

You would want some sort of sliding device inside to mark the indices, so you couldn't "cheat" with visual angles.

There would also need to be a bell at the 10" mark, for @TinyPrincess . "Ring the bell, win a prize!!!"

 

[TinyPrincess]

You would want some sort of sliding device inside to mark the indices, so you couldn't "cheat" with visual angles.

There would also need to be a bell at the 10" mark, for @TinyPrincess . "Ring the bell, win a prize!!!"

Definitely - perhaps an RFID with built-in SIM card - sending an instant message the moment a cock passes the magic 10" mark - although I somehow think the first message will be from a guy inserting a sleeve or dildo...

 

[Ocine]

Definitely - perhaps an RFID with built-in SIM card - sending an instant message the moment a cock passes the magic 10" mark - although I somehow think the first message will be from a guy inserting a sleeve or dildo...

Sadly, you will need to invest your 10k for create this marvel of technology fleshlight for measuring penis

Maybe you will sell alot of them and tripple your investment !

 

[6259561]

Yes. Not only that, but I've never believed it could be accurately measured anyhow. The length is how far it sticks out off your body. If you lift up a real flaccid dick to get that, it scrunches up some. If it hangs down, it stretches (in addition to having no start point for the measurement). It's too dynamic for anything more than a rough estimate.

I would definitely challenge this Idea, say i have measured my flaccid size about 10 times I have gotten the same measurement a minimum 70% of the time, with vayring size changes coming in certain scenarios like cold temp, hot temps etc.