Women's Issues Random Thoughts

[MickeyLee]

MIgraines are a toboggan ride through the devil's hairy prolapsed, unwiped rectum.

They make me spacy and cranky in equal amounts.

 

[AlteredEgo]

You know what strikes me about this? How isolating it can be when it happens. I can think of 3 instances off the top of my head where I was left feeling like it was my fault because of the fallout from these things.

Example 1 - When I worked in a bar, there was an obnoxious little shit who wouldn't leave me alone and I spent the whole night studiously ignoring him. I had to leave the bar for change, he got in my face demanding a kiss, I said no and he dived on me. There is no other word. Hands everywhere. One of the bouncers was nearby, saw the whole thing and (literally) flung him out. The obnoxious little shit came back with his gang because he took offense at being ejected. The guys on the door called for back up. It kicked off big time and ended in death threats on both sides. I felt awful. The only word out of my mouth during the whole thing had been "No" but I felt completely responsible.

Example 2- not long after the incident above. A gang of us went for a meal in chinatown after closing. Friend of my boyfriend who I had always described as such a nice guy offered to walk me to get a taxi safely. He's drunk and proceeds to start crossing the line. I tell him to pack it in and he gets angry, says he's sick of being the "nice guy" and drags me into an alley and starts pulling at my clothes. He was so much stronger than me, so incredibly heavy... I thought that was it... Member of the group unexpectedly catches us up and intervenes. He is friends with my boyfriend and the guy. Tells me it's better that I don't mention it to anyone because he was drunk and it would cause so much trouble. *I* feel guilty and agree to keep it to myself because I would feel responsible for the fallout when someone got hurt. And someone *would* get hurt.

Example 3 - the guy in work. After being rejected started fucking with my hours, changing the rota so I would be in when there was just the 2 of us and trying to exert the tiny bit of authority he had. Constant snide comments about how he wasn't "good enough". Wouldn't leave the subject alone when there was nobody else around. He'd always been considered pretty harmless, such a "nice boy" by the older women in the office and I didn't want fuss, so I just kept turning the other cheek and didn't say anything to anyone. Eventually one of the guys noticed, we were good friends and his response was "Are his comments aimed at you? If he's giving you a hard time, I'll knock him into next week." There was no way I was letting him risk his job... So I denied it. I found another job and left.

Even when you have people who have your back, the whole situation can still be fraught and isolating. I like to think I'd know how to handle it better now, that I wouldn't feel responsible for the behaviour of others. The thing is, it's not like I was exactly a shrinking wallflower then. Somehow, I just found it isolating. Other people had behaved badly but it felt like the responsibility was on me to almost protect them from the consequences. Maybe that's how they get away with it - the recipients of their attention don't want a disproportionate response.

My date Saturday would possibly have killed that guy. He is a nice man, but he's from where he's from, and he's not prepared to tolerate that level of disrespect toward himself, a woman in his company, nor is he prepared to let violence go unanswered. In an instant, he was like a stranger, the gentleman poet I know was replaced. I begged him to stand down, to let me handle it. I pushed him away, obstructed his view of the guy. "Please, Babe. Let me do this my way. Excuse me! Security!" He kept very, very gently, smoothly removing himself from my physical control. If that security guy had not passed me when he did, I don't know that my friend would have been convinced to just get into my truck. I couldn't allow a black ex con to hurt a young white guy in Virginia. I love my friend. I couldn't let anything happen to him. I also really wanted to see him beat that little shit into Tuesday. I resent that I had to make a decision at all. I resent that my friend was involved. I resent that my "no" couldn't just stand. Hell, I didn't even reject that guy (though I would have). I told him I was on a date, had not arrived alone. Lo, behold, my friend came along and proved that. Why did it have to be a problem?

The most isolating time was late at night, three blocks from home when I lived in the Bronx. Very few people are legally in possession of firearms in NYC. Gem dealers are among that number. If in NY, you see someone handcuffed to a briefcase, they are guaranteed to have a concealed firearm. Such a guy grabbed me. I hadn't even actually said no yet. I just projected disinterest. He grabbed me BEFORE inviting me to his place for weed and drinks. He had no intention of hearing no I'm the first place. He started walking me to his house and I was too afraid to object violently. I dug in my heels, and told him I didn't want to go, but he was much stronger, and began pulling me from the main road anyway. The street was empty, and I didn't want to get shot. Then the miracle of one of those garbage trucks from the mob-run waste management company came by. The guy on the back called out to me, and my captor let go. I climbed aboard the back of the truck, and they dropped let off on my corner. Of course, that guy wanted my phone number too, but I pretended not to hear over the loud disel motor. What I remember most was as I ran up to the truck, the first guy, who had been making me memorize his phone number shouted after me, "You won't call. I don't think you like me."

No shit, Creepy.

I didn't stick around to find out what happens if the mob truck guy feels put upon for being rejected after rescuing a damsel. I ran home like my feet had wings.

 

[693987]

often the ones who get drunk. Alcohol elevates aggressiveness.
But on the other side, it's true. Some school student who never had criminal events, brought a shotgun, went to the girl's house (the parents were outside at work), shot the girl and his sister directly in the head because she said no. I was an isolated event, not all men are violent against women thankfully

It's not just drunk people, it's not an isolated event, and of course not all men are violent. No shit. Just like not all priests molest people. Duh.

 

[286798]

You, Sir, are Shrodinger's Asshole.

Post of the day. Adding this to my vocabulary.

 

[jacenx]

How so?

Well A long time ago, I asked a girl if she could give me a chance. Well, she said no. We only meet 30 minutes. Maybe I was unprepared or I didn't give the correct answers she wanted. fuck, I didn't have time to ask her what she likes. So sometimes I'm feeling sick of this world.

 

[deleted924715]

Well A long time ago, I asked a girl if she could give me a chance. Well, she said no. We only meet 30 minutes. Maybe I was unprepared or I didn't give the correct answers she wanted. fuck, I didn't have time to ask her what she likes. So sometimes I'm feeling sick of this world.

If it was a long time ago, maybe it's time to stop dwelling on one woman. She's not so special - there are millions more out there

 

[lms28]

MIgraines are a toboggan ride through the devil's hairy prolapsed, unwiped rectum.

They make me spacy and cranky in equal amounts.

I’m sorry @MickeyLee - that doesn’t sound like any kind of fun.

 

[LaFemme]

MIgraines are a toboggan ride through the devil's hairy prolapsed, unwiped rectum.

They make me spacy and cranky in equal amounts.

Three days on this toboggan ride. Nauseous and sick. Vise on my head. I can literally smell the onions in the fridge downstairs and it makes me want to hurl.

 

[MickeyLee]

I’m sorry @MickeyLee - that doesn’t sound like any kind of fun.

It ain't a trip to the carnival, dude. I am feeling heaps better today.

Three days on this toboggan ride. Nauseous and sick. Vise on my head. I can literally smell the onions in the fridge downstairs and it makes me want to hurl.

Ugh.. I had to scoop the litter box. The cats were not entertained by the noises coming out of my face. *hold over cranky-stink face*

I mainline caffeine and ibuprofen like both are going to be outlawed the next day. Then I go to sleep until I feel better.

I hope your version of a cure finds its way to you, Ms. Femme *hugs*

 

[LaFemme]

It ain't a trip to the carnival, dude. I am feeling heaps better today.



Ugh.. I had to scoop the litter box. The cats were not entertained by the noises coming out of my face. *hold over cranky-stink face*

I mainline caffeine and ibuprofen like both are going to be outlawed the next day. Then I go to sleep until I feel better.

I hope your version of a cure finds its way to you, Ms. Femme *hugs*

Caffeine, ibuprofen, tiny doses of codeine, and darkness. And ice packs. Sleep when I can. So tired of these things.

 

[AlteredEgo]

@LaFemme and @MickeyLee please get well, and stay well.

 

[TexanStar]

The Trump Administration Quietly Changed the Definition of Domestic Violence and We Have No Idea What For

Without fanfare or even notice, the Department of Justice’s Office on Violence Against Women made significant changes to its definition of domestic violence in April. The Obama-era definition was expansive, vetted by experts including the National Center for Victims of Crime and the National Domestic Violence Hotline. The Trump administration’s definition is substantially more limited and less informed, effectively denying the experiences of victims of abuse by attempting to cast domestic violence as an exclusively criminal concern.

 

[MickeyLee]

The Trump Administration Quietly Changed the Definition of Domestic Violence and We Have No Idea What For

Without fanfare or even notice, the Department of Justice’s Office on Violence Against Women made significant changes to its definition of domestic violence in April. The Obama-era definition was expansive, vetted by experts including the National Center for Victims of Crime and the National Domestic Violence Hotline. The Trump administration’s definition is substantially more limited and less informed, effectively denying the experiences of victims of abuse by attempting to cast domestic violence as an exclusively criminal concern.

*sips coffee* Well, there is my first "I fucking hate Donald Trump" of the day. *checks watch* This might be a personal best.

When reflected off the changes to domestic violence laws in Russia, it's easy to see that the lackey doesn't fall far from the dictator tree.

 

[MickeyLee]

I am completely obsessed with The Curious Creations of Christine McConnel. Food porn, spookiness, werewolves and a mummified cat. All with a fetishistic gleam of 1950s housewife.

Netflix, you are my new best friend.

 

[LaFemme]

I am completely obsessed with The Curious Creations of Christine McConnel. Food porn, spookiness, werewolves and a mummified cat. All with a fetishistic gleam of 1950s housewife.

Netflix, you are my new best friend.

I know. I binged it, too. Could never do it, but had total crafty fantasies.

 

[MickeyLee]

I know. I binged it, too. Could never do it, but had total crafty fantasies.

Netflix Binge Twinsies!!

I'll be attempting a massive step up in my Halloween foods game this year. Cuz inspired and all that.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

I've been discussing abortion with a member in the politics section today. He claims to be fine with abortion, but calls women who describe it as exercising our right to control "our bodies" hypocritical because we're trying to control another person's body. In all reality I've probably been feeding a troll but it's worth stating:

It is exactly that. Exercising my right to decide what happens to MY body. A zygote or fetus is not a person. It is still part of the human it's developing inside of. AKA: the Woman's Body.

We are not hypocrites. I don't need to be told that aborting a fetus is technically killing something. It is a horrible experience, and not a fucking easy choice to make.

That's all.

 

[286798]

I've been discussing abortion with a member in the politics section today. He claims to be fine with abortion, but calls women who describe it as exercising our right to control "our bodies" hypocritical because we're trying to control another person's body. In all reality I've probably been feeding a troll but it's worth stating:

It is exactly that. Exercising my right to decide what happens to MY body. A zygote or fetus is not a person. It is still part of the human it's developing inside of. AKA: the Woman's Body.

We are not hypocrites. I don't need to be told that aborting a fetus is technically killing something. It is a horrible experience, and not a fucking easy choice to make.

That's all.

Men Cause 100% of Unwanted Pregnancies – Can We Talk? – Medium

 

[MickeyLee]

I'm watching The Ted Bundy Tapes on Netflix. When asked to descube himself he used the phase "nice guy"

 

[TinyPrincess]

Prefer Al to Ted...