Interested in a guy at summer school who feels "unattainable"

[AllieHeidi]

It seems to me as if a lot of the other girls are both physically attracted to him, and want him for themselves.
I have seen some girls talk to him one-on-one and tried to get him on dates, and he seems flattered by that, but I haven't heard him give any definite responses to them.

I'm confused. Are you seeking advice on how to be this boy's one and only, or coping tips on how to effectively delude yourself into believing that is the case?

I will continue to utilize music as a reference for brevity's sake and, frankly, my own entertainment.

 

[Sagittarius84]

Not sure if you're aware of the century we're in, but girls are allowed to have fun, too. If she wants to just casually bang him for her own temporary amusement until she finds someone worth committing to, there is nothing wrong with that. She's not "for the streets" just because she's a female who "has the audacity" to enjoy herself sexually.

It's when these girls expect to lock down guys like this when the behavior becomes silly. At that point, I hold no sympathy for the inevitable heartbreak that will ensue. Especially if they're warned ahead of time by multiple parties.

So eager to apply shaming language you can't see the forest for the trees. It's very convenient to posit "for the streets" as judgment for women having the audacity to enjoy themselves sexually because it precludes women from having to take accountability as to the parties they seek for said sexual enjoyment. You'd think being aware of the century we're in, collectively women would realize the very men they allow the most non commital and casual sexual access to, are the very ones with the highest propensity of fucking their lives up, and would find a way to satiate their desires with men much more apt to offer commitment and such when offered sexual access.


Keep listening to TLC, tho...obviously they stand above sooo many others when it comes to establishing mutually fulfilling relationships and giving good advice for other women to do the same... I guess we could use some more MAC 10s, Andre Risons, and Ushers as the men other men should aspire to be like..lol

 

[AllieHeidi]

It's very convenient to posit "for the streets" as judgment for women having the audacity to enjoy themselves sexually because it precludes women from having to take accountability as to the parties they seek for said sexual enjoyment.

Do not try to pretend that I'm misreading you when you know good and well that phrase is the new 2020 term for "whore."

You'd think being aware of the century we're in, collectively women would realize the very men they allow the most non commital and casual sexual access to, are the very ones with the highest propensity of fucking their lives up, and would find a way to satiate their desires with men much more apt to offer commitment and such when offered sexual access.

It's almost like you can't fathom the thought of some women literally only wanting certain men for sex and others for commitment. Oh, wait, you do. No doubt you consume quite a bit of manosphere garbage that admonishes women for having multiple men for multiple purposes (read: orbiters) and then finally settling down when she's ready. Because God forbid women exercise sexual freedom and choice at the expense of the male ego.

I already made it very clear that if this girl was looking for commitment from him not to sleep with him because he's clearly for the streets. A factor you, unsurprisingly, have yet to acknowledge. If anything, you seemed to almost begrudgingly "praise" him for being an attractive college boy under 25 with options. I can't imagine why that is. /s

Apparently, she did that anyway. The only way that would now work in her favor is if she has downgraded him to "dildo with a pulse" status. Otherwise, she is in for a very rude (and forewarned) awakening if she intends to attempt a serious relationship with someone who has no business being taken at all seriously.

 

[Sagittarius84]

Do not try to pretend that I'm misreading you when you know good and well that phrase is the new 2020 term for "whore."

I know what the term is often used for, and if you read between the lines you'd see it has more to do with the selected parties than the actions or frequency. Both SexxyRed and Erykah Badu are known as openly promiscuous women, only SexxyRed is considered "for the streets". It's the players not the game that get girls and women fucked up.

It's almost like you can't fathom the thought of some women literally only wanting certain men for sex and others for commitment. Oh, wait, you do. No doubt you consume quite a bit of manosphere garbage that admonishes women for having multiple men for multiple purposes (read: orbiters) and then finally settling down when she's ready. Because God forbid women exercise sexual freedom and choice.

And it's almost like you can't fathom that strategy has done more harm collectively to women than good, as espoused their own collective complaints about the men they end up dealing with, or more often nowadays, the demonization of men they cant. I don't ever admonish women for the sex they choose to have, I simply point out the problems they tend to want to complain about after the fact have more to do with whom they choose to have that sex with. I think everyone should sow their wild oats on a level before they get into committed relationship, but if you don't want to put in the work to do so productively , you deserve every probable consequence headed your way.

If anything, you seemed to almost begrudgingly "praise" him for being an attractive college boy under 25 with options. I can't imagine why that is. /s

I call it observation, the "praise" comes in the form of casual and non commital sex that gets thrown his way. Girls have every unfettered opportunity to choose different and make my observation inaccurate. I'm sorry that most heterosexual males are aware of the heightened sexual selectivity of heterosexual females.

Apparently, she did that anyway. The only way that would now work in her favor is if she has downgraded him to "dildo with a pulse" status. Otherwise, she is in for a very rude (and forewarned) awakening if she intends to attempt a serious relationship with someone who has no business being taken at all seriously.

She's already jumped off that building....but good on you for offering hope that she can recover by flapping her arms fast enough.
I can't wait for the next chapter when she finally settles down with the man that will take her seriously, then wonders what's wrong with him in 2-7 yrs when she no longer feels the "spark". Hopefully this guy isn't in town when that happens.....

 

[Sagittarius84]

@JenniferJo , I'm telling you this as a man that has been not so popular with girls in his early youth, then leveled up so that he was, has mostly female friends, family and associates, as well as a daughter. I am married and still garner attention from all types of women, more so in some cases....
This man is bad for you right now...maybe in about 10 yrs or so he'll be in a different headspace, but all he has for you now is your future ruin and no amount of satisfying casual sex is going to undo that. If you really need to get your rocks off I think you should start being very purposeful with your selective process...if you just want to go off of looks, try to find someone that doesn't garner as much attention from other women, for whatever reason...if what I suspect is true and the attention of other girls/women plays a part in your attraction, I suggest you only delve into the fugly and charismatic so that at the very least your future aspirations for a long term committed relationship aren't as fucked up by the past traumas you allowed yourself to endure.
If your prerogative is to bang a bunch of guys to get it out of your system, then make it a point to not paint yourself into a corner by banging the guys all the other girls want to bang; a little compromise now saves soooo many headaches later.

 

[AllieHeidi]

I know what the term is often used for, and if you read between the lines you'd see it has more to do with the selected parties than the actions or frequency. Both SexxyRed and Erykah Badu are known as openly promiscuous women, only SexxyRed is considered "for the streets". It's the players not the game that get girls and women fucked up.


And it's almost like you can't fathom that strategy has done more harm collectively to women than good, as espoused their own collective complaints about the men they end up dealing with, or more often nowadays, the demonization of men they cant. I don't ever admonish women for the sex they choose to have, I simply point out the problems they tend to want to complain about after the fact have more to do with whom they choose to have that sex with. I think everyone should sow their wild oats on a level before they get into committed relationship, but if you don't want to put in the work to do so productively , you deserve every probable consequence headed your way.

I call it observation, the "praise" comes in the form of casual and non commital sex that gets thrown his way. Girls have every unfettered opportunity to choose different and make my observation inaccurate. I'm sorry that most heterosexual males are aware of the heightened sexual selectivity of heterosexual females.

She's already jumped off that building....but good on you for offering hope that she can recover by flapping her arms fast enough.
I can't wait for the next chapter when she finally settles down with the man that will take her seriously, then wonders what's wrong with him in 2-7 yrs when she no longer feels the "spark". Hopefully this guy isn't in town when that happens.....

This entire diatribe reeks of the barely concealed bitterness of an older man toward a young guy getting all the pussy he never could in his heyday as well as the girls falling over themselves to give it up.

Nice touch sliding in the "diminished female pair bonding theory" toward the end there. I'm shocked you haven't choked on the sheer volume of red pills you've undoubtedly consumed.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

This entire diatribe reeks of the barely concealed bitterness of an older man toward a young guy getting all the pussy he never could in his heyday as well as the girls falling over themselves to give it up.

Nice touch sliding in the "diminished female pair bonding theory" toward the end there. I'm shocked you haven't choked on the sheer volume of red pills you've undoubtedly consumed.

It's his M.O.

It's been old for a long time
Then claims that the fact that he happens to have reproduced and the offspring is female that he can't be sexist or misogynist.

 

[PostPhobos]

@JenniferJo , I'm telling you this as a man that has been not so popular with girls in his early youth, then leveled up so that he was, has mostly female friends, family and associates, as well as a daughter. I am married and still garner attention from all types of women, more so in some cases....

Is this a résumé? Like is the original poster meant to read this and be impressed, swoon, then hire you for advice?

You'd think being aware of the century we're in, collectively women would realize the very men they allow the most non commital and casual sexual access to, are the very ones with the highest propensity of fucking their lives up, and would find a way to satiate their desires with men much more apt to offer commitment and such when offered sexual access.

I sense resentment here for women who enjoy casual sex. As if it's something to be reserved for men because women just aren't clever enough to manage it or because their biology somehow makes them more likely to fuck up their lives.

It IS a different century we're in. Women can take advantage of protection and birth control just as men can. Despite your patronizing advice, women are largely free to pursue all sorts of relationships whether you approve of it or not.

This entire diatribe reeks of the barely concealed bitterness of an older man toward a young guy getting all the pussy he never could in his heyday as well as the girls falling over themselves to give it up.

Nice touch sliding in the "diminished female pair bonding theory" toward the end there. I'm shocked you haven't choked on the sheer volume of red pills you've undoubtedly consumed.

Said it better than I could. It's like a boomer version of Andrew Tate trying to give advice to a young woman who just needs a "YEAH! Go for it! Introduce yourself and give it a try!"

 

[Sagittarius84]

I appreciate all the responses, definitely confirms people will glean what affirms their opinions and throw away the rest as chaff.

I sense resentment here for women who enjoy casual sex.

Quite the opposite, more of an appreciation for women whose casual sex lives are without long term consequences, unfortunately that doesn't seem to be the norm.

As if it's something to be reserved for men because women just aren't clever enough to manage it or because their biology somehow makes them more likely to fuck up their lives.

I literally advised everyone should get an opportunity to sow their wild oats prior to getting into a long term relationship, that wasn't gender specific, I also said from a non gender specific basis those that choose to do so in a ignorant or unproductive manner deserve every probable consequence coming to them.

Nice touch sliding in the "diminished female pair bonding theory" toward the end there. I'm shocked you haven't choked on the sheer volume of red pills you've undoubtedly consumed.

Again shows you're not paying attention..the redpill manchildren attribute that wholly to numbers of previous partners, it's rooted in sexual insecurity and a scarcity mindset...you'll notice I've never not once mentioned anything even remotely close to the concept of "bodycount" because I don't consider it to be a factor...but go off...

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

Word salad gets tossed like a hairy butthole...

 

[MisterB]

Word salad gets tossed like a hairy butthole...

My goodness, but this is 2023. Hello!

Women can and should do what they want when it comes to anything sexual. Period.

Whether they save themselves for marriage or chose to fuck their brains out with as many partners as they want. And then decide to marry. Or not. It's a Woman's Right to Choose!!!

Without any judgement. Period.

Not my business, nor quite frankly should it be anyone else's. Especially any man. Not a woman, so doesn't have a woman's perspective or mindset. Yet somehow some feel they can/should judge. Bullshit!

Especially when some men think it's fine and dandy, a right of passage, to put as many notches in their bedposts as they can, but when it comes to women...

But then we all sadly know about misogyny, which by definition (Oxford Languages" is:
dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women.

Bad enough there's so much of it elsewhere at LPSG. Has NO place in Women's Issues. NONE!

 

[PostPhobos]

I literally advised everyone should get an opportunity to sow their wild oats prior to getting into a long term relationship, that wasn't gender specific, I also said from a non gender specific basis those that choose to do so in a ignorant or unproductive manner deserve every probable consequence coming to them.

This, much like the rest of your commentary, reads to me as “Women should only enjoy casual sex in the manner in which I approve of.”

You seem near gleeful at the prospect of women being ‘punished’ for ‘mistakes.’ And you define mistakes as them pursing relationships you deem “ignorant and unproductive.”

Why do you feel entitled to make these odd sweeping judgments about other people and their sexual lives?

@JenniferJo , I'm telling you this as a man that has been not so popular with girls in his early youth, then leveled up so that he was, has mostly female friends, family and associates, as well as a daughter. I am married and still garner attention from all types of women, more so in some cases....

That’s my bad. I forgot you’re a leveled up ladies man with an actual daughter with an actual vagina who actually knows best the choices women you don’t know should make.

Please understand we’re talking by each other instead of to each other cause you’ve got a weird “I know best” perspective. And as for being gender non-specific I’m going to say I don’t know you, so I won’t assume. But would you give this same grave warning about consequences if the poster was a young man? Would you even respond to the thread?

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

This, much like the rest of your commentary, reads to me as “Women should only enjoy casual sex in the manner in which I approve of.”

You seem near gleeful at the prospect of women being ‘punished’ for ‘mistakes.’ And you define mistakes as them pursing relationships you deem “ignorant and unproductive.”

Why do you feel entitled to make these odd sweeping judgments about other people and their sexual lives?



That’s my bad. I forgot you’re a leveled up ladies man with an actual daughter with an actual vagina who actually knows best the choices women you don’t know should make.

Please understand we’re talking by each other instead of to each other cause you’ve got a weird “I know best” perspective. And as for being gender non-specific I’m going to say I don’t know you, so I won’t assume. But would you give this same grave warning about consequences if the poster was a young man? Would you even respond to the thread?

I love your brain. It's a good brain. Makes me want to give you some brain.

I'll see myself out