This guy tried to jerk me off in the sauna room

[Chrysippus]

viscous

so whose cock was drooling?

Re this:
The real problem is that society is so hung up about sex that people don't learn how to properly ask for...OR how to give or refuse...consent.
Bullshit!

 

[Matt_x]

Without a victim/witness no one is getting booked for anything.

This is true, but this would bypass having to show up at the gym and feeling like it hurt your sense of pride or having shame that they will now know. This will give you some sort of anonymity. The gym's cooperation is a necessity and once you declare this to the police, it would be handled by the investigator. Once he his captured, the likelihood that the officer will recall your case(in the future) is very slim. I do encourage that you speak up though.

 

[Chrisdude71]

Hindsight is a marvellous thing, you did nothing wrong at all, however long he was touching you as you never invited him. It's up to you if you report him but as you are now nervous about going to the gym then it sounds better if you do as why should he spoil it for you. You have nothing to be embarrassed about as it was an uninvited sexual assault, you could get the Police involved but probably that is not what you want. You can ask to see the manager and report what happened, perhaps write down what happened, virtually how you told us but say he started to masturbate you rather than jerk. The gym should take action as you could sue them I presume but if you stated you just want him to be removed as a member then I think that should be the least action they should take. Who touches your penis is for you to decide.
Good luck.

 

[328982]

Today I went to the gym and after my workout, I had a shower and then went to the sauna room. There was another guy there and we both basically just minded our own businesses. Then an old guy came in (looked about in his 50's or 60's, and I'm in my early 20's) and sat next to me and he seemed friendly, once the other guy left he started to remove his towel and I can see his dick, I don't care about nudity so that didn't bother me, what bothered me was he started to touch me and then started to jerk me off under my towel, I felt really uncomfortable and I didn't know what to say and he did it for 15 seconds and then I said "ok, I think you should stop" and he did and I booked it out of there.

I didn't want to tell the staff because I really didn't want this to be a big thing and I was really embarrassed, so I just left.

Do you think I should have said something? Or is it better that I just pretend it didn't happen? I just hope I don't see him anymore at the gym.

Seems to be a bit of a pattern. Almost every post of yours involves an older gentleman masturbating near you

 

[Igot8here]

Seems to be a bit of a pattern. Almost every post of yours involves an older gentleman masturbating near you

Because he's full of shit...

 

[deleted136887]

Seems to be a bit of a pattern. Almost every post of yours involves an older gentleman masturbating near you

They may not be "Gentlemen"
Does not seem like a gentlemanly action.

 

[328982]

They may not be "Gentlemen"
Does not seem like a gentlemanly action.

Let's not overdo the irony

 

[deleted136887]

Let's not overdo the irony

Ok how about sexual asault then..

 

[avg1000]

Just like that he sat next to you reached under your towel and started jerking you off ?????? he never slightly touched you first ?? never gave any type of sign to let you know he may do this ?? This is extremely hard to believe , your what 20 ? and your asking what should you have done I'm thinking you should be asking your mother how to handle this next time Are you sure he wasn't looking for your pussy .. I have never ever had anyone come close to doing that just out of the blue I frequent the steam and sauna a lot unless of course your at some sort of gay bath house I just find this very hard to believe . Why not tell us the whole story

 

[328982]

Ok how about sexual asault then..

I was saying 'gentlemen' in an ironic way and it's obvious from the OP posting history that this is a fantasy, not real, so assault doesn't really come into it.

 

[Matt_x]

Seems to be a bit of a pattern. Almost every post of yours involves an older gentleman masturbating near you

Perhaps, or he keeps putting himself in situations where he doesn't take into account surrounding slimy perverts.

 

[328982]

Perhaps, or he keeps putting himself in situations where he doesn't take into account surrounding slimy perverts.

It's the OP's fantasy. This kind of post is fantasy clickbait for your kind too. It allows you to vent about 'surrounding slimy perverts' from the safety of the moral highground. It's no longer socially acceptable to be openly homophobic so it comes out in other forms: one is disgust with predatory/public displays of sex that just happen to be homosexual. It's your fantasy scenario too, in a way.

 

[shard38]

It's the OP's fantasy. This kind of post is fantasy clickbait for your kind too. It allows you to vent about 'surrounding slimy perverts' from the safety of the moral highground. It's no longer socially acceptable to be openly homophobic so it comes out in other forms: one is disgust with predatory/public displays of sex that just happen to be homosexual. It's your fantasy scenario too, in a way.

I don't see how being not ok with predatory display of sex makes me homophobic.

 

[328982]

I don't see how being not ok with predatory display of sex makes me homophobic.

Nor do I. That's not the point. If we were having a balanced discussion about predatory display of sex, gay and straight, I'd agree with you, not ok. Actually most of those sexual displays in the real world come from straight men towards women. That's just a fact of numbers. But here and particularly on fantasy-fuelled threads like this, the opprobrium is always on the "perverts" or sexual acts that just so 'happen' to be gay. Even when it's obviously clickbait, as here, a certain kind of person leaps on it as a reason to vent their disgust. It's almost like a fantasy for them too, of a different kind, an indulgence. You quite often read about hypothetical scenarios where 'if someone were to do x/y/z I'd punch/react in this way' and they work themselves up into moral indignation about it. The scenarios are almost always about 'gay' acts and almost always the judgement is from straight people. I do have a problem with that when it's basically a stand-in for disgust with gay sex per se, which from my experience of this site, it often is. This allows gays to be characterised as "perverts" while pretending that the issue is about public/predatory display of sex.

 

[shard38]

Nor do I. That's not the point. If we were having a balanced discussion about predatory display of sex, gay and straight, I'd agree with you, not ok. Actually most of those sexual displays in the real world come from straight men towards women. That's just a fact of numbers. But here and particularly on fantasy-fuelled threads like this, the opprobrium is always on the "perverts" or sexual acts that just so 'happen' to be gay. Even when it's obviously clickbait, as here, a certain kind of person leaps on it as a reason to vent their disgust. It's almost like a fantasy for them too, of a different kind, an indulgence. You quite often read about hypothetical scenarios where 'if someone were to do x/y/z I'd punch/react in this way' and they work themselves up into moral indignation about it. The scenarios are almost always about 'gay' acts and almost always the judgement is from straight people. I do have a problem with that when it's basically a stand-in for disgust with gay sex per se, which from my experience of this site, it often is. This allows gays to be characterised as "perverts" while pretending that the issue is about public/predatory display of sex.

I didn't look into the OP's posting history so didn't take it to be a fantasy. And as an open bi guy who has been on the receiving end of some sexual violence I would give the exact same reaction to a post from a woman who had been assaulted.

 

[328982]

I didn't look into the OP's posting history so didn't take it to be a fantasy. And as an open bi guy who has been on the receiving end of some sexual violence I would give the exact same reaction to a post from a woman who had been assaulted.

Yes, and I would too. I'm really not trying to condone sexual assault or predatory behaviour.

 

[shard38]

Yes, and I would too. I'm really not trying to condone sexual assault or predatory behaviour.

I understand. Just didn't occur to me people make these things up as a fantasy.

 

[Matt_x]

It's the OP's fantasy. This kind of post is fantasy clickbait for your kind too. It allows you to vent about 'surrounding slimy perverts' from the safety of the moral highground. It's no longer socially acceptable to be openly homophobic so it comes out in other forms: one is disgust with predatory/public displays of sex that just happen to be homosexual. It's your fantasy scenario too, in a way.

My kind?!??

Assuming that the OP is fabricating a story to fulfill a fantasy is asinine. Based of what?.. that one other post at the nude beach. Did it ever occur that he might like public nude settings. You can't jump down peoples throats assuming what the OP's intentions are, neither you or I know that, you'd just make an ass out of yourself.

I'd be the last person you'd call a homophobe, my use of the word pervert is based off of the action this individual did. It so happens that it was a man. For whatever reason you took offense to is entirely all on you.

Antagonizing a new member and calling his bluff, on sexual assault is pretty scummy. Not to mention that following up on my posts in other threads is grounds for harassment.

 

[328982]

My kind?!??

Assuming that the OP is fabricating a story to fulfill a fantasy is asinine. Based of what?.. that one other post at the nude beach. Did it ever occur that he might like public nude settings. You can't jump down peoples throats assuming what the OP's intentions are, neither you or I know that, you'd just make an ass out of yourself.

I'd be the last person you'd call a homophobe, my use of the word pervert is based off of the action this individual did. It so happens that it was a man. For whatever reason you took offense to is entirely all on you.

Antagonizing a new member and calling his bluff, on sexual assault is pretty scummy. Not to mention that following up on my posts in other threads is grounds for harassment.

As others have spotted, this story is pretty hard to believe in the first place. Then, out of the four postings by the OP, three of them are on this same theme. In Hard On in Gym Shower, we have a "much older man with a full hard on not even caring". On the Nude Beach, there is an older man who "started to stroke his cock and started talking about masturbating, I got kind of uncomfortable and finished the convo and left". That sounds like fantasy to me and I call bullshit on real sexual assault.

You say, "It so happens that it was a man". That's my point, it so happens it's always gay men who are branded "slimy perverts". If you are truly concerned about sexual assault, focus on the real world, not clickbait threads. 9 out of 10 victims of sexual assault and rape in the USA are women http://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/...packet_statistics-about-sexual-violence_0.pdf and they aren't all being assaulted by gay men.

But no, you're too busy in the Fictitious Stories section, offering counselling to a man with a tale about being touched up by his male therapist. Or policing urinals against imaginary gay assaults on your person: "Someone can enter the pisser and take a piss, it only takes that one pervert to make it weird. This has never happened to me, but if anyone jerks or tries to make a move on me. Best believe my fist will make contact, when explicit gestures are unwanted". Who is the fantasist here?

Well, good luck with your campaign to reform this site.

 

[Mister2101]

Most often, another guy will ask you first before touching you. Say something like, "Do you want some help stroking yourself?" I've said yes at times...other times said No. A few times a guy has just reached for my cock, and I've said No or had to push their hand away.....and they went away. Not a big deal to me. I've also had a good looking older man just bend over and start sucking my cock.....I did not say no, or stop, or push him away. I enjoyed the BJ. Do what is comfortable for you. Peace.