Pretty straight forward. What's with the frothing at the mouth about them? What about them is supposedly "more of a turn on" than a gay man?
Why Are (some Of) Y'all Obsessed With Straight Men?
- Thread starter bigboaster
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I, for one, am not. My fantasies and conquests revolve around other gay men. I don’t waste time on what I can’t have.
Now, that being said, I have hooked up with a few “straight” men, but they were openly curious about gay sex and made me aware of that interest. And who am I to deny a kind, inquisitive man the knowledge and experience he so desperately seeks?
Now, that being said, I have hooked up with a few “straight” men, but they were openly curious about gay sex and made me aware of that interest. And who am I to deny a kind, inquisitive man the knowledge and experience he so desperately seeks?
Sounds like you're a just very smart and generous individual to me. lol
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I'm not obsessed with them. The lure for me is the challenge. Forbidden fruit and all that. I'm not interested in probably 75% of all men of all persuasions. I love sucking cocks, and will usualy do the deed if they fit my requirements. I don't give a shit how they identify.
cedarizzo
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I'm just obsessed with cocks. I really don't care about what they are attached to.
As a porn scenario, the idea of a good-looking "straight guy" letting you suck him off is hot. But, in reality, it's not something I even think of as a possibility.
I don't care sexually for straight men as I am not delusional enough to think about turning them. Also I hate it when straight men use gay men's attraction to them to bolster their ego. I stopped recruiting for our side years again...lol. Besides that there are so many gay out men in the world, why waste time.
Some people, male and female think very highly of themselves to the point of deluding themselves. In my early 20s, a straight coworker of mine was afraid of gay men, he said out loud that gay men might chase after him should he look their way or give them any attention. Are you fucking bullshitting me with that remark? He was medium height, overweight with womanly hips and with below average looks. Average looking women wouldn’t look at his way yet alone any gay men. He bought into the whole sleazy stereotypes (that he saw on TV/movies) of gay men chasing after every straight men.
Mean while, there are some gay men out there that wouldn’t date other gay guys because they’re beneath them, and will only date or go after straight men. Like WTF? Their brain cells are working overtime doing mental gymnastic.
charmander123
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I guess someone could say also, "why are some of yall obessed with femininizing the gay community?"
Men in the majority are attracted to power. When it comes to sex it is physical power. There are real physical and BEHAVIORAL characteristics that are feminine because they are observed in the most part in women. Gay men are not attracted to women. I think there is room for everyone, whether your masculine or feminine. But let's not demonize those who don't find your BEHAVIOURS attractive. Every individual is different.
Men in the majority are attracted to power. When it comes to sex it is physical power. There are real physical and BEHAVIORAL characteristics that are feminine because they are observed in the most part in women. Gay men are not attracted to women. I think there is room for everyone, whether your masculine or feminine. But let's not demonize those who don't find your BEHAVIOURS attractive. Every individual is different.
Seems like a bit of strawman to the original argument. No one said anything about attraction to power or to women. Its perfectly reasonable that gays are attracted to masculinity (power? Huh? Idk about that one) so that's fine. I am also attracted to more masculine guys generally.
But that is different from being more attracted to straight men. Not all gays are feminine and not all straight men are dominant or powerful. It's kind of a silly conflation imho.
And just perpetuates the idea that straight men are more of "real men" than gay ones.
- vex4,
I think gay men are sexually attracted to MEN, and it just so happens that a majority of the men a lot of gay men meet on a daily basis are straight, somewhere around 90-95% iirc unless you happen to be lucky enough to live and work in a metropolis's gayborhood. Given that it's pretty normal that we would get crushes on straight guys.
Again that's fine. Being merely attracted to straight men is expected. Lol. And I never took issue with this.
My post is directed to those who are interested in straights over other gays essentially or are pre occupied with straights sexually. I want that perspective if possible.
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- rixi,
I like straight or "straight" guys. I don't have any delusions of turning them and I wouldn't say I'm obsessed with them or actively look for them. However, the majority of guys I've been with have been "straight." Most of them have been friends or acquaintances.
I think it turned out that way because I don't really immerse myself in gay culture. That is, I don't go to clubs or LGBTQ events. That's more to do with me being introverted and prefer just staying home most of the time or doing things that don't involve being around a ton of people. I also am not really interested in romance or a long term partner. I like sex. I don't care for the expectations and responsibilities that come with a relationship. I'm also not all that into the whole random hookup Grindr scene.
As a result, most of my friends and acquaintances just ended up being straight or "straight" men. I have gay friends and I've messed with more than a few of them. They're just not as physically close to me. I'm more than happy to help my "straight" friends get off or experiment. It's clean and fun. No expectations.
I think it turned out that way because I don't really immerse myself in gay culture. That is, I don't go to clubs or LGBTQ events. That's more to do with me being introverted and prefer just staying home most of the time or doing things that don't involve being around a ton of people. I also am not really interested in romance or a long term partner. I like sex. I don't care for the expectations and responsibilities that come with a relationship. I'm also not all that into the whole random hookup Grindr scene.
As a result, most of my friends and acquaintances just ended up being straight or "straight" men. I have gay friends and I've messed with more than a few of them. They're just not as physically close to me. I'm more than happy to help my "straight" friends get off or experiment. It's clean and fun. No expectations.
Yes thank you. This is some of the replies I really wanted (with explanations for why that's the case)
Appreciate your story.
I may have a different perspective because I am older and remember when homosexuality wasn't even spoken about. When I did see gay men they were flamboyant and not attractive to me. But I couldn't disclose my sexuality to straight men so I couldn't have close straight male friends. Through the decades managed to have a lot of sex with closeted men. Never wanted to "convert" them or see them as a conquest. I think I realized that just like I would never want to have sex with a woman, most men have no interest in sex with another man, and I celebrate that. Now that homosexuality is out in the open, I can look at a straight man and don't have to hide the fact, and a lot of straight guys really like gays. I am at the point in my life where sex isn't that interesting to me and I don't see any appealing partners, and no one is asking me out! Not many gay men in my age group, only one of my gay friends is still alive. AIDS wiped them out.
Things I like about some straight men. (not a complete list. The way they move, their body language and gestures, very different. They can throw a ball without ever throwing like a girl. They have never felt ashamed of their sexuality so they don't carry that pain. I like that they have families of their own that they take are of, children to raise. In many ways I see heterosexual life is a happier life, and I like to bask in the warmth straight men give off. I like to see the camaraderie they have in areas such as sports, playing poker, fishing, fixing things, all that stuff that I can't relate to. I can help them out though, and enjoy doing so.
Thanks for asking this question, there is not a one-size-fits-all answer to it.
Things I like about some straight men. (not a complete list. The way they move, their body language and gestures, very different. They can throw a ball without ever throwing like a girl. They have never felt ashamed of their sexuality so they don't carry that pain. I like that they have families of their own that they take are of, children to raise. In many ways I see heterosexual life is a happier life, and I like to bask in the warmth straight men give off. I like to see the camaraderie they have in areas such as sports, playing poker, fishing, fixing things, all that stuff that I can't relate to. I can help them out though, and enjoy doing so.
Thanks for asking this question, there is not a one-size-fits-all answer to it.
I’m attracted to men, period. That includes gay and straight men. I’m not obsessed with straight men, but if they are attractive, I can’t help but desire them. Again: men are men. My attraction makes no distinction between gay and straight.
I think for many it's just the human (though often male) hunting instinct to try and get the most rare prey attainable.
So getting a gay man to drop their pants is relatively easy. A straight or closeted man is harder. A straight man who is good looking is even more rare. A straight good looking man with a donkey cock even more so. The price for being more picky is that there are less fish to be shot in the barrel.
While I am not one to pursue straight men in particular, I admit that I have also made my life more difficult by only choosing men with certain characteristics.
To each their own. If someone wants to chase only straight men, then that's up to them.
So getting a gay man to drop their pants is relatively easy. A straight or closeted man is harder. A straight man who is good looking is even more rare. A straight good looking man with a donkey cock even more so. The price for being more picky is that there are less fish to be shot in the barrel.
While I am not one to pursue straight men in particular, I admit that I have also made my life more difficult by only choosing men with certain characteristics.
To each their own. If someone wants to chase only straight men, then that's up to them.
So as someone who is sometimes attracted to "straight" men (among many other types I have), I think I'd explain it this way:
I spent a big chunk of my 20s in the Army on active duty. In part, that was about problems I had with my own sense of masculinity. I wanted to prove to myself that I and that being gay didn't make me any less of one. Another part of that was wanting to turn myself into the kind of man that I'd be attracted to. I was very much into hypermasculinity (some of my first JO material was the WWF) and I wanted to be that big kinda intimidating guy who doesn't set off anyone's gaydar. About the same time, I was noticing that a lot of gay guys who, for instance, get into the leather scene, may be able to dress reasonably convincingly as bikers, but don't exactly act the part; as is sometimes said with some cruelty, "He looks good, but he opens his mouth and his purse falls out."
Meanwhile, I would have all these straight guys back in my unit (and later in the jobs I held after getting out) who were rubbing off on me. You are who you associate with, and for some very formative years I was hanging out with a bunch of crazy straight infantrymen.
I want to emphasize that a lot of this had to do with my own hangups about my orientation. I'm a bit ashamed of how I could be pretty cruel myself regarding stuff like drag or effeminacy (and I've since come to have very great respect for the skill and talent that goes into putting together a drag persona).
So anyways, of course these straight guys around me would have looked fantastic to my eyes. They were everything I wanted in a man at the time. Except as far as I could tell they weren't into me at all, and I didn't dare say anything that might have given away my orientation. This was the age of Don't Ask, Don't Tell.
I think, too, being stuck in the the closet throughout my time in the Army also had the effect of making me wonder if I'd be accepted if the other guys knew who I really was. That's one of the things that sucks about the closet: that fear of rejection if they knew the real you really fucking sucks.
So when I did happen to run into someone who came across as "straight" but nevertheless was interested in sex with me, that not only really was an attractive quality, but it also was a way of getting some validation: "See? This straight guy likes me well enough to give my his cock." It was a tiny bit of proof that maybe if ever I did come completely out, it wouldn't be as bad as I feared.
In retrospect, there's something very humiliating and debasing about that sort of thing. It can make you desperate to please men who likely really don't deserve it, just to keep alive the faint hope that maybe, if I can catch him alone at just the right moment, he'll give me the validation that I need to see myself as more of a "real man". I want to be just one of the guys, but I also want it to have that sexual twist added in, or else it's not a full acceptance of the whole me.
If that makes any sense at all.
I spent a big chunk of my 20s in the Army on active duty. In part, that was about problems I had with my own sense of masculinity. I wanted to prove to myself that I and that being gay didn't make me any less of one. Another part of that was wanting to turn myself into the kind of man that I'd be attracted to. I was very much into hypermasculinity (some of my first JO material was the WWF) and I wanted to be that big kinda intimidating guy who doesn't set off anyone's gaydar. About the same time, I was noticing that a lot of gay guys who, for instance, get into the leather scene, may be able to dress reasonably convincingly as bikers, but don't exactly act the part; as is sometimes said with some cruelty, "He looks good, but he opens his mouth and his purse falls out."
Meanwhile, I would have all these straight guys back in my unit (and later in the jobs I held after getting out) who were rubbing off on me. You are who you associate with, and for some very formative years I was hanging out with a bunch of crazy straight infantrymen.
I want to emphasize that a lot of this had to do with my own hangups about my orientation. I'm a bit ashamed of how I could be pretty cruel myself regarding stuff like drag or effeminacy (and I've since come to have very great respect for the skill and talent that goes into putting together a drag persona).
So anyways, of course these straight guys around me would have looked fantastic to my eyes. They were everything I wanted in a man at the time. Except as far as I could tell they weren't into me at all, and I didn't dare say anything that might have given away my orientation. This was the age of Don't Ask, Don't Tell.
I think, too, being stuck in the the closet throughout my time in the Army also had the effect of making me wonder if I'd be accepted if the other guys knew who I really was. That's one of the things that sucks about the closet: that fear of rejection if they knew the real you really fucking sucks.
So when I did happen to run into someone who came across as "straight" but nevertheless was interested in sex with me, that not only really was an attractive quality, but it also was a way of getting some validation: "See? This straight guy likes me well enough to give my his cock." It was a tiny bit of proof that maybe if ever I did come completely out, it wouldn't be as bad as I feared.
In retrospect, there's something very humiliating and debasing about that sort of thing. It can make you desperate to please men who likely really don't deserve it, just to keep alive the faint hope that maybe, if I can catch him alone at just the right moment, he'll give me the validation that I need to see myself as more of a "real man". I want to be just one of the guys, but I also want it to have that sexual twist added in, or else it's not a full acceptance of the whole me.
If that makes any sense at all.
