Why Many Straight Men Here Are So Obsessed With Deciding Who Is Straight And Who Isn't ?

[Sagittarius84]

I also dont understand this issue of "policing". Reality is the only police. Straight is a designation of someone whom soley partakes in hetero sexual activity. You want to break down other aspects of how relationships are formed or pursued you start introducing terms like -amorous and you get the specificity that you need. My guess is there a lot of bisexual heteroamorous men whom want to be free of the selectivity their bisexuality often incurs by living their lives as straight men with girlfriends, wives, unencumbered by the dick they've given or taken with other men...so own that shit.
I happen to 100% percent agree that there is a coalition of men and women in power invested in stifling the sexuality and sexual fluidity of men as a whole, and that reasonable straight men should be standing shoulder to shoulder with our gay and bi brothers to free ourselves of those sexual shackles...but I think gay men especially often seem to forget...that they're men and a lot of their bullshit is shit that we as straight men in our mutual interactions readily can identify and call out as readily as femme lesbians often have to do with the unreasonable ranks of straight men....which may be the progenitor of this so called policing that is perceived.

 

[deleted5591641]

Why is it so strange that men come here to explore? You don't have to want to have sex with a cock to be interested and fascinated by them.

It's not strange that men come here to explore. That is not what is being questioned here but some men deciding what is straight and what not. You don't have to want to have sex with a cock but expressing that disdain in such pejorative way in a forum where you know, let's be honest, probably the majority is bisexual or gay, well that is a very questionable behaviour and only screams "I'm a closeted homo" very out-loud.

 

[deleted5591641]

It's strange because when you are part of a marginalized group, it's comforting to portray the archetypes of one's detractors as somehow jealous. Its empowering to imagine straight men as closeted cowards than as peers with valid opinions.

No marginalized groups. Have you taken a look at how many members there are in this forum. The spirit of this forum is not to marginalize anyone. If you want to feel marginalized yourself or like to imagine some can be marginalized that is your thing.
Obviously nobody is trying to feel comfortable in this discussion. If that was the purpose we would just ignore those saying what is straight and what not.
Nobody is calling anyone jealous nor feeling empowered about anything just talking about the facts and maybe those saying that some guys who self-identify as straight aren't, should have more respect for other's opinions instead of saying "no, you are not what you say you are, you are not 100% this or that. So stupid.

 

[deleted716371]

It's not strange that men come here to explore. That is not what is being questioned here but some men deciding what is straight and what not. You don't have to want to have sex with a cock but expressing that disdain in such pejorative way in a forum where you know, let's be honest, probably the majority is bisexual or gay, well that is a very questionable behaviour and only screams "I'm a closeted homo" very out-loud.

that kind of behaviour sure is questionable, but I'm not sure where the conclusion that they are "closeted homo" comes from either? That is something being thrown on straight men on here much too often IMO.

 

[GoingOnABoeing]

This continues to be an interesting thread. I still stand behind my opinion that you have no right to be offended by penis talk or pictures if you are on this site. I remember a 100% straight claiming he would block anyone that posted a photo of a dick. That should be considered troll behavior here. It's really bizarre that I've seen people imply things such as being seen naked or seeing others naked means you aren't straight. There are issues you need to sort out if you feel that way.

The excuse of "but I'm here for the women" just doesn't compute. I also belong to a BMW enthusiast forum. There are some female members on that forum but I'm there to talk to about cars. Just like I'm on LPSG to talk about dicks. There are much better means of meeting women than LPSG.

 

[palakaorion]

(not reading 4 pages of response, apologies if I parrot someone else)

I only care about how people label/categorize/classify themselves if/when they choose a label that I've also chosen for myself, because their representation of that label indirectly affects how others might see me.

Example: if you call yourself Christian, as I do, and you openly advocate or practice hate-filled rhetoric or actions, then I will call you out, because others see your actions and hear your label and paint me with the same brush.

If you call yourself Japanese, then I have nothing to say about that, because I am not Japanese.

If you call yourself straight, as I do, and you're getting brojobs at the gym and plowing ass on the DL, then I'm calling you out, because straight men don't have sex with other men. Find another label better suited to you.

 

[MennoCoehorn]

Never noticed that.... nobody gives a s*** in my world.

 

[deleted5591641]

that kind of behaviour sure is questionable, but I'm not sure where the conclusion that they are "closeted homo" comes from either? That is something being thrown on straight men on here much too often IMO.

Ask any psychologist.

 

[deleted5591641]

This continues to be an interesting thread. I still stand behind my opinion that you have no right to be offended by penis talk or pictures if you are on this site. I remember a 100% straight claiming he would block anyone that posted a photo of a dick. That should be considered troll behavior here. It's really bizarre that I've seen people imply things such as being seen naked or seeing others naked means you aren't straight. There are issues you need to sort out if you feel that way.

The excuse of "but I'm here for the women" just doesn't compute. I also belong to a BMW enthusiast forum. There are some female members on that forum but I'm there to talk to about cars. Just like I'm on LPSG to talk about dicks. There are much better means of meeting women than LPSG.

Exactly my point! Let's say I'm one of those guys who actively engage in that dispute here ... If I'm bothered by other people who have a completely different view of what I consider to be definition of being straight, and it's so important in the definition of who i am, why keep myself as an active member of a forum where I know I'll keep disagreeing with those people probably forever? Because we all know who those are, are almost always the same few guys. If they aren't here just for the sake of arguing (trolls), then they are either masochists, or closeted gay or bi guys and this is their way of venting homophobic feelings. Because after clearing all of the above, the only thing that would keep them coming here is the main content of LPSG = BIG COCKS.

 

[deleted716371]

Ask any psychologist.

Every psychologist I know would have answered with a lot more nuances than the simple assumption that they are all "gay".

 

[deleted5591641]

Every psychologist I know would have answered with a lot more nuances than the simple assumption that they are all "gay".

Wow, isn't that interesting?! I think we have met different kinds of psychologists.

 

[deleted716371]

Wow, isn't that interesting?! I think we have met different kinds of psychologists.

Maybe so. However, there seems to be a pretty broad consensus that "closeted gay" feelings may result in homophobia, but that this is far from the only explanation.
If you have some science to support the contrary, please post a link.

 

[fordonfire]

It's strange because when you are part of a marginalized group, it's comforting to portray the archetypes of one's detractors as somehow jealous. Its empowering to imagine straight men as closeted cowards than as peers with valid opinions.

Not sure I would agree with that last part although I understand the line of thinking for sure. I feel blessed to live in a time and place where people care less and less about rigid, static, black-and-white labels. Where I live is fairly conservative but its still pretty rare to find people with that obsessive "are they or aren't they" mentality that persists in other parts of the world. With everything we know about humanity and our capacity to understand life in a more abstract, complex, or amorphous way, why be bothered by any of the possible reasons that someone else might get tripped up by this need to label, or police, or ridicule others. I mean, shouldn't everyone be entitled to live the life of several different people if they want? Probably better to do it one at a time instead of simultaneously, but does it really matter? If there is one thing I've learned it's that there are more and more people today that simply WANT IT ALL

 

[PSUKingster]

Many gay men are just as bad always deciding who is gay and who isn't. If only everyone could mind their own business and stop labeling folks. Enough is enough!

 

[Sagittarius84]

Not sure I would agree with that last part although I understand the line of thinking for sure. I feel blessed to live in a time and place where people care less and less about rigid, static, black-and-white labels. Where I live is fairly conservative but its still pretty rare to find people with that obsessive "are they or aren't they" mentality that persists in other parts of the world. With everything we know about humanity and our capacity to understand life in a more abstract, complex, or amorphous way, why be bothered by any of the possible reasons that someone else might get tripped up by this need to label, or police, or ridicule others. I mean, shouldn't everyone be entitled to live the life of several different people if they want? Probably better to do it one at a time instead of simultaneously, but does it really matter? If there is one thing I've learned it's that there are more and more people today that simply WANT IT ALL

I agree with you on the issues of policing or ridiculing, but on the nebulous fluidity that bi men seem to want to inhabit(and gay men seem to want to partake of), i think labeling as an unfortunately necessary tactic when it comes to those that might want to interact with us, specifically gay men and women interested in men. No different than the lesbians that aren't interested in the "magic dick" some supposed straight man has to induce their inherent bi or hetero nature, yeah increasingly I feel actually heterosexual men have to make clear whom they are interested in and whom they would prefer attention from.
The gay man that is emboldened by the "str8" man is going to feel some type of way when he interprets an actual straight man's rejection that mirrors the coy interest of the actually bicurious man. The woman that is with man under the auspices of him self identifying as "str8" is going to be unnecessarily suspicious of every actual straight man henceforth. These interactions should be fairly benign to discuss and hash out, but we know human nature has resulted in all of the constant troubles and frustrations we collectively face, so why not start from a place of truth to eliminate valid motivations for confusions and subsequent emotional responses?

 

[JayPR]

I’ve come to realize that the issue here is that there are two kind of people: 1) those who have a very black or white way of thinking and believe in rigid labels when classifying stuff and people, and 2) those who, even if they still use labels, understand that rules or classifications are not set in stone and the world is more complex, nuanced and full of shades in between.

 

[deleted1547822]

I can't fathom why a 100% straight would ever need to join a 'dick' forum populated primarily with men and penises and cock.

Because "straight" doesn't equate to "homophobic".

 

[deleted1547822]

RE: "Policing" Why have an "ask a straight man" section if not-straight men are going to reply?

Typical "ask a straight man" thread (with a little hyperbole to illustrate the point):

Q: Do you straight guys secretly want to suck one of the many dicks on this forum?
100% straight: No
80/20: I love giving blowjobs, and head down to the truck stop every Friday night and suck as many dicks as I can. But I'm strait. Don't you judge me.

See?

I don't care what your percentage is. If you're giving the second answer, you're posting in the wrong section. If looking at dicks, fondling dicks, sucking dicks, etc... is your thing; more power to you. You do you. You're not straight though.

 

[deleted1547822]

And 'joining up to a forum dedicated to penis' doesn't equate to straight.

Are urologists gay? They spend a lot of time looking at dicks.

So...I have to ask. Why are YOU here? And why have you been a member of this site for so long if you are so completely straight? What are you getting out of it?

Research for a paper on body dysmorphic disorder. You’ll find it in my post history. The sociology of the group / forum piques my curiosity, from the liberal bent of the politics section to the ‘oh woe was me, nobody loves me because of my tiny penis’ posts.

Why are you, who lists yourself as 100% gay, responding to a thread you didn’t start in the “Ask a Straight Man” section. Read the rules.

 

[1139089]

Translating the question:

Every time we gay men come here to ask in the "ask a straight man" section if you guys do gay stuff, you tell us that the question is gay and that straight men wouldn't do that. Why? Keep in mind that you are not straight, you just haven't opened up to your gay side.

...

Do you guys read the questions that are asked here in this section? 90% come from gay men asking if straight guys would do this or that and why not.... Nobody is obsessed with anything.

If the straight men here say an action is gay, it is probably gay. For example: yes, jerking off another men is gay stuff. You don't agree? Ask the same man to get off the internet and tell the same story in real life to get a verdict. He probably won't, because he knows the answer.