Fucking hell. As I stand on the sidewalk outside the gym. Downpour. The kind that usually makes me laugh. When you are safe inside or in your car. It’s not funny when you are outside and it’s getting to be fall. Literally it’s like cats and dogs. I can see huge rain drops bouncing high off the street. A car goes by and I jump back so I don’t get splashed. Not my day. Crappy work out, in that I couldn’t get to my next targeted weight level. Then – oddly, no action, zip, zero in the sauna or steam room. I’m 23 with a hot body. I can usually, with a high degree of confidence, count on getting some if I want it. But not today. Damn. And now it’s raining and I’m stuck. And horny, as per usual.
So a little about me. 23, as I said, from New York – moved out here to Philly for work a few weeks ago. I know NO ONE here. Girlfriend is back in NYC for the next two weeks. I’m bored, lonely and it’s raining. My apartment is about four blocks away – no way would I make it without being completely soaked. And I’m like a cat (huh, pussy) – I dislike very much getting rained on. I look around and see two guys run up some stairs and go into a bar. Kinda hot dudes. I’m guessing a little older than me. Hey – I have a girlfriend, but I not opposed to getting some nor admiring other hot dudes. Just don’t ask me to reciprocate! I’m a giver of pleasure, for hot chicks or a dude desperate enough to suck me off.
The bar is, very originally called “Pete’s Tavern”. When in Rome... So I put my gym bag over my head and dash the 30 feet to the stairs and run up like the guys before me did.
How to describe it. Typical bar. Wood paneling – old. Dimly lit given the down pour. Smoke (who smokes these days. Fucking Philly. And indoors?). Bunch of guys at the bar. Various couples at tables. It looks nice and friendly and it’s just people having fun. An attractive brunette asks if I’d like a table or a seat at the bar, as she looks at me and smiles. Wow. I should have rubbed one out in the shower. Shit. Look at that rack. I am so horny. I’ve had like 20 erections today. I’m not listening to her. Then I look up and she has a not very pleased fixed smile on her face. “I have a brain you know”. And she looks at me. Damn man. Busted and that was rude.
“I’m so sorry. That was very rude and not like me at all. My girlfriend is away and…” I probably should NOT tell her I am horny and need some luvin. She’s probably worked that out herself. “And sorry. I’m new to town, I don’t know anyone, literally, for 200 miles. It’s doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but…” I just stop. She pats my arm. “It’s okay, handsome, I’m the maître’d for a reason” and she tweaks her blouse. “It’s just the guys aren’t usually so obvious. Welcome to town. You are in the right place. My name is Samantha”. And I smile. I have a new friend. Damn. “Hi, I’m Conrad”, and we shake.
“I think you might like the bar.” And she leads me over. “That’s Terry over there” and nods to an attractive dude bartender. Huh. “And Pete, Jr. will be in later” and she places a menu on the bar. She nods to Terry and introduces me. Terry drops a coaster down for me “What’ll it be, Connie?” And I smile. I’ve been Con, Connie & Rad all of my life – just not usually so soon after meeting. And Terry is hot. My brain is like a see-saw between a nice rack and a cute smile on Samantha, and Terry – I’d say 25 – 27, tall, brown hair. Totally smooth face, great body, smile and charm. I like this place.
“What’s good” and Terry rolls his eyes. “It’s a bar, Connie. Just about everything back here is drinkable. What are you into? Beer? Wine? Cocktail?” and he looks at me. Yeah, guess that’s a dumb question and he’s probably tired of hearing it. “Any good local beers? I like a pale lager” And he nods, and puts a cup under a tap and pulls an inch or two. “Let me know if you like this” and I taste it, well drink it actually, it’s not wine. Perfectly boring lager. Just my speed. “Great, I’ll take it” and he pulls a pint and walks away. I sip and check out the crowd, then my phone. I see the two dudes who came in before me. They are with a very attractive girl. But it looks like their legs are touching each others. Hmm. Where is my mind today.
See, yeah – I had the Tinder app on my phone pre-girlfriend. But I also had Grindr. Just in case. Right now I’m not sure which one I want to open up…but I see more dicks than chicks here, so I open Grindr. Just checking out what’s going on. A couple of guys are close by. I read their profiles. I get oral. That’s it. And I generally send a partial face pic and a dick pick if the guy is hot and clean and that usually seals the deal. Actually – when they ask “how big is that monster” or whatever, and I tell them it’s a true nine inches. They either go quiet or they beg to meet me. I even have a dick pick of my boy by a ruler. That shuts the naysayers up. Funny how many dudes are actual cock hounds.
There are a couple of hotties. One, unfortunately, is a Total Top. Too bad. His pics are hot. My profile is very clear. “Top, mostly Str8, looking to receive oral only. Want a blow-and-go. You be clean and DDF.” I get a few pings, sip my beer, order another one and engrossed in my phone, tapping out a message to a potential relief provider. “Hey man, here’s your beer” and I thank him. Vaguely acknowledging to myself that my server was not Terry and that he had a raspy, very sexy, very masculine, deep voice. But the seed doesn’t quite penetrate as blow-job boy is saying he can be free in 10 minutes and he can host. Perfect, I think. Day may be looking up. And I look outside. Still raining outside. And I have a fresh beer and I could use a burger as wafts of delicious smelling food passes me by on the way to their diners. I let BJ know I need an hour to get to him. I get a frown back “Have to work in an hour”.
Damn. Cozy here. I have a full beer. I can get a burger -- or I can chuck it in and get soaked in the rain and then get my dick wet. And my balls are FULL. Damn, they are almost painful, as I re-adjust them. Then I get another ping and another dude wants to blow me. I figure there are plenty of fish in the sea tonight, so I text the first guy a “next time!” and chat with the new dude. I look up as a guy sits one down from me. Holy fuck. Hot dude. He looks at me and smiles. “Danny Demarco” and puts his hand out. I shake it. “Conrad Smythe-Worthington.” And I get lost in his eyes.
We make chit chat bar conversation. And my dick is chubbing. He’s masculine. HOT. But he could be a little gay and I could see my dick in his mouth. He’s got a great body and he’s just a little too fussy with his dress sense. Yep. This guy is totally going to blow me later. And sexy voice comes over and fist bumps Danny “Danny my man, how’re the big boys hanging today” and Danny cups his balls. “They’re hanging just fine, Pete, but my big boy needs me some pussy – fast” and Pete just smiles and places a beer in front of him. They’re chatting. I’m in a daze. A fog. I can’t process anything. And Pete looks funnily at me, but keeps on talking. I sip my beer and Pete takes it to refill it, brushing his fingers along mine, and I feel a shock. Pete looks at me, still talking smack to Danny and he smiles, and returns a full beer to me.
Stunned. And Pete knows it. He must damn well be used to it. But holy sweet Jesus. Fuck. I’m speechless, thoughtless. And silent. Danny turns to me and smirks. “Lemme guess here, fancy pants, you are just meeting Pete and you think he’s hot. Fucking fags. Happens every time” and he laughs. But he’s smiling. “No, no…” and I have a mental freeze. Actually, yes. The dude’s right. So I decide to man up.
And I’m looking at Danny and then at Pete. “Yep, you got me. But I’m not into guys. I was just startled to see such a handsome man behind the bar.” And they shrug at each other. “Pete’s our lucky Lothario – and he’s great for business – chicks wanna sleep with him and dudes want to hang out with him.” And he leans in. “And he has a massive shlong. Not as big as mine, but big enough to properly stretch a chick out.” And Pete’s just drying glasses. I look at him and he shrugs. “Danny’s a piece of work. Total fucking knuckle-head and he has been since 2nd grade” and Danny laughs. “When you wore a bucket on your head for six days thinking you were Shrek.” And Pete just smiles and nods.
So a little about me. 23, as I said, from New York – moved out here to Philly for work a few weeks ago. I know NO ONE here. Girlfriend is back in NYC for the next two weeks. I’m bored, lonely and it’s raining. My apartment is about four blocks away – no way would I make it without being completely soaked. And I’m like a cat (huh, pussy) – I dislike very much getting rained on. I look around and see two guys run up some stairs and go into a bar. Kinda hot dudes. I’m guessing a little older than me. Hey – I have a girlfriend, but I not opposed to getting some nor admiring other hot dudes. Just don’t ask me to reciprocate! I’m a giver of pleasure, for hot chicks or a dude desperate enough to suck me off.
The bar is, very originally called “Pete’s Tavern”. When in Rome... So I put my gym bag over my head and dash the 30 feet to the stairs and run up like the guys before me did.
How to describe it. Typical bar. Wood paneling – old. Dimly lit given the down pour. Smoke (who smokes these days. Fucking Philly. And indoors?). Bunch of guys at the bar. Various couples at tables. It looks nice and friendly and it’s just people having fun. An attractive brunette asks if I’d like a table or a seat at the bar, as she looks at me and smiles. Wow. I should have rubbed one out in the shower. Shit. Look at that rack. I am so horny. I’ve had like 20 erections today. I’m not listening to her. Then I look up and she has a not very pleased fixed smile on her face. “I have a brain you know”. And she looks at me. Damn man. Busted and that was rude.
“I’m so sorry. That was very rude and not like me at all. My girlfriend is away and…” I probably should NOT tell her I am horny and need some luvin. She’s probably worked that out herself. “And sorry. I’m new to town, I don’t know anyone, literally, for 200 miles. It’s doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but…” I just stop. She pats my arm. “It’s okay, handsome, I’m the maître’d for a reason” and she tweaks her blouse. “It’s just the guys aren’t usually so obvious. Welcome to town. You are in the right place. My name is Samantha”. And I smile. I have a new friend. Damn. “Hi, I’m Conrad”, and we shake.
“I think you might like the bar.” And she leads me over. “That’s Terry over there” and nods to an attractive dude bartender. Huh. “And Pete, Jr. will be in later” and she places a menu on the bar. She nods to Terry and introduces me. Terry drops a coaster down for me “What’ll it be, Connie?” And I smile. I’ve been Con, Connie & Rad all of my life – just not usually so soon after meeting. And Terry is hot. My brain is like a see-saw between a nice rack and a cute smile on Samantha, and Terry – I’d say 25 – 27, tall, brown hair. Totally smooth face, great body, smile and charm. I like this place.
“What’s good” and Terry rolls his eyes. “It’s a bar, Connie. Just about everything back here is drinkable. What are you into? Beer? Wine? Cocktail?” and he looks at me. Yeah, guess that’s a dumb question and he’s probably tired of hearing it. “Any good local beers? I like a pale lager” And he nods, and puts a cup under a tap and pulls an inch or two. “Let me know if you like this” and I taste it, well drink it actually, it’s not wine. Perfectly boring lager. Just my speed. “Great, I’ll take it” and he pulls a pint and walks away. I sip and check out the crowd, then my phone. I see the two dudes who came in before me. They are with a very attractive girl. But it looks like their legs are touching each others. Hmm. Where is my mind today.
See, yeah – I had the Tinder app on my phone pre-girlfriend. But I also had Grindr. Just in case. Right now I’m not sure which one I want to open up…but I see more dicks than chicks here, so I open Grindr. Just checking out what’s going on. A couple of guys are close by. I read their profiles. I get oral. That’s it. And I generally send a partial face pic and a dick pick if the guy is hot and clean and that usually seals the deal. Actually – when they ask “how big is that monster” or whatever, and I tell them it’s a true nine inches. They either go quiet or they beg to meet me. I even have a dick pick of my boy by a ruler. That shuts the naysayers up. Funny how many dudes are actual cock hounds.
There are a couple of hotties. One, unfortunately, is a Total Top. Too bad. His pics are hot. My profile is very clear. “Top, mostly Str8, looking to receive oral only. Want a blow-and-go. You be clean and DDF.” I get a few pings, sip my beer, order another one and engrossed in my phone, tapping out a message to a potential relief provider. “Hey man, here’s your beer” and I thank him. Vaguely acknowledging to myself that my server was not Terry and that he had a raspy, very sexy, very masculine, deep voice. But the seed doesn’t quite penetrate as blow-job boy is saying he can be free in 10 minutes and he can host. Perfect, I think. Day may be looking up. And I look outside. Still raining outside. And I have a fresh beer and I could use a burger as wafts of delicious smelling food passes me by on the way to their diners. I let BJ know I need an hour to get to him. I get a frown back “Have to work in an hour”.
Damn. Cozy here. I have a full beer. I can get a burger -- or I can chuck it in and get soaked in the rain and then get my dick wet. And my balls are FULL. Damn, they are almost painful, as I re-adjust them. Then I get another ping and another dude wants to blow me. I figure there are plenty of fish in the sea tonight, so I text the first guy a “next time!” and chat with the new dude. I look up as a guy sits one down from me. Holy fuck. Hot dude. He looks at me and smiles. “Danny Demarco” and puts his hand out. I shake it. “Conrad Smythe-Worthington.” And I get lost in his eyes.
We make chit chat bar conversation. And my dick is chubbing. He’s masculine. HOT. But he could be a little gay and I could see my dick in his mouth. He’s got a great body and he’s just a little too fussy with his dress sense. Yep. This guy is totally going to blow me later. And sexy voice comes over and fist bumps Danny “Danny my man, how’re the big boys hanging today” and Danny cups his balls. “They’re hanging just fine, Pete, but my big boy needs me some pussy – fast” and Pete just smiles and places a beer in front of him. They’re chatting. I’m in a daze. A fog. I can’t process anything. And Pete looks funnily at me, but keeps on talking. I sip my beer and Pete takes it to refill it, brushing his fingers along mine, and I feel a shock. Pete looks at me, still talking smack to Danny and he smiles, and returns a full beer to me.
Stunned. And Pete knows it. He must damn well be used to it. But holy sweet Jesus. Fuck. I’m speechless, thoughtless. And silent. Danny turns to me and smirks. “Lemme guess here, fancy pants, you are just meeting Pete and you think he’s hot. Fucking fags. Happens every time” and he laughs. But he’s smiling. “No, no…” and I have a mental freeze. Actually, yes. The dude’s right. So I decide to man up.
And I’m looking at Danny and then at Pete. “Yep, you got me. But I’m not into guys. I was just startled to see such a handsome man behind the bar.” And they shrug at each other. “Pete’s our lucky Lothario – and he’s great for business – chicks wanna sleep with him and dudes want to hang out with him.” And he leans in. “And he has a massive shlong. Not as big as mine, but big enough to properly stretch a chick out.” And Pete’s just drying glasses. I look at him and he shrugs. “Danny’s a piece of work. Total fucking knuckle-head and he has been since 2nd grade” and Danny laughs. “When you wore a bucket on your head for six days thinking you were Shrek.” And Pete just smiles and nods.