Describe A Film In A Boring Way

[T_Lurch]

The boat sank.

 

[Motion-of-the-Ocean]

Some people claim the people they know are not really the people they know. Then things really get weird.

 

[T_Lurch]

A bourbon swilling writer moves to a snowy hotel and ghosts drive him batshit. He tries to murder his clairvoyant son and wife with an ax and winds up a popsicle.

 

[Motion-of-the-Ocean]

A cab driver gets confrontational with his reflection.

 

[T_Lurch]

A bunch of interstellar miners aboard a spaceship battle an endoparasitoid beast with acidic blood. The ship explodes.

 

[T_Lurch]

An ambassador to Rome finds out his son is the Antichrist. He tries to kill him with a magic dagger and gets shot by a policeman.

 

[404goldie]

Orphan girl gains clarity when she awakens from a strange dream.

 

[deleted3995701]

A group of people wear children's pajamas to prevent the tinman from throwing a rock.

 

[T_Lurch]

A schoolteacher takes a field trip to Washington D.C. and finds out politicians suck.

 

[T_Lurch]

A mask-wearing escapee from the maniac farm returns to his hometown to kill his sister and her friends. A psychologist shoots him with a .38 caliber handgun but to no avail.

 

[steve2727]

Astronaut crash lands his spaceship back on Earth - but takes several days to realise it's Earth, despite it being Very Obviously Earth.

 

[deleted3995701]

Boy gets kidnapped by illegals, grows up to be a jewel thief. He's the cause of millions of deaths and for some reason, people like him. Looks great in underwear when splashed with orange liquid.

 

[T_Lurch]

Muscular murderbot travels back in time to murder restaurant waitress.

 

[Motion-of-the-Ocean]

After a strange workday, a man finds cosmic meaning in a plate of mashed potatoes.

 

[T_Lurch]

A little girl gets pulled into a TV by ghosts. The parents and a diminutive psychic battle the monster by throwing tennis balls at it. Their house implodes.

 

[Motion-of-the-Ocean]

A fisherman realizes he just might need a bigger boat.

 

[T_Lurch]

A burned guy in a hat and sweater kills teenagers in their sleep with a glove.

 

[T_Lurch]

Two half-wits journey cross country to return a briefcase full of stolen money.

 

[Reg]

Ben Cartwright goes in to space.

 

[T_Lurch]

A dwarf and a criminal swordsman try to hide a magical baby from an evil sorceress.