I'm Only Interested in Straight Men, Help

[Boaxy]

How do you even know they're straight?

They tell him. OP can take hints. He asks them out and the reaction/response is oppression worthy. etc.

 

[cutwrestler]

One of the things I find so attractive about straight men is that so many of them are not even aware they are attractive - they are totally authentic

 

[Rotterweiler]

One of the things I find so attractive about straight men is that so many of them are not even aware they are attractive - they are totally authentic

true, many are convinced they are ugly and instead they are very beautiful and sexy, but girls always belittle them.

 

[Bojangles78]

"Qualities MOST gay guys don't possess"... it's sad the limited view you guys have. You all seem to be working in stereotypes

you clearly live in a bubble, you either only hang out with gay guys or mostly straight. If you ever cross over to the other side frequently you'd realize that straight men and gay men in general act very different, interpret the world differently. You can argue on here all day long but your words have no weight on those who truly experience differences and pay attention to the world they live.

 

[Bojangles78]

One of the things I find so attractive about straight men is that so many of them are not even aware they are attractive - they are totally authentic

one of the subtle things about straight men that they are not even aware of is the confidence when going out into the world. It's a luxury few gay men get to have unfortunately.

 

[Dandinh]

As others have noted, meet gay men in more social situations rather than hookup apps. Maybe volunteer at an LGBT Center or go to events designed to find gay friends. The man I wound up marrying is a big, handsome guy I met in a setting that was specifically for finding friends, not sex. We got around to the sex, but it was friendship first.

And if it's behaviors that attract you--other than sexual aggression, as you saw from the apps--maybe adjust the kind of gay men you're connecting with. Perhaps go be a supporter of the nearest gay rugby team. As someone with lots of experience in gay rugby culture, I'll admit there are very stereotypical gay guys who play, but we also have some very masculine guys on the team, too. Perhaps that would be a better match for you?

Sorry if this is obvious, but where are you seeing events designed for making friends in the lgbt community? I’d be super happy to go to one but haven’t really seen anything advertised.

 

[nygayguy1]

Sorry if this is obvious, but where are you seeing events designed for making friends in the lgbt community? I’d be super happy to go to one but haven’t really seen anything advertised.

That's a fair question. When I met my husband, things were different (it's a few years ago) but there are a few places you can start that come to mind. As mentioned before, see if there's an LGBT Center in your area and find out what events they're having. Also, see about Pride events. Those can be a great way to meet people. And not just at Pride. See who has plans, and offer to help with preparing. That interaction can be great for meeting people.

Look online. Sites like meetup.com can help. Try searching for things like "gay friends." There are opportunities out there!

I don't know what's in your area, but around here, you can go to things like Gay Men's Chorus events. I can't sing to save my life, but I can be a supporter. Same for stuff like gay rugby. I don't play, but I've met lots of guys through being a supporter.

There are lots of opportunities. Just change your approach a little.

 

[Jake1973]

one of the subtle things about straight men that they are not even aware of is the confidence when going out into the world. It's a luxury few gay men get to have unfortunately.

Very true. It is kind of like being right handed. The world is engineered with you in mind so there are a lot of things you can take for granted.

It also explains how fragile some of them are when that gets challenged. If you are other-than-straight, other-than-white, or—I will say it—other than conventionally attractive, you develop coping skills that they never had to learn.

 

[PrintsA]

you clearly live in a bubble, you either only hang out with gay guys or mostly straight. If you ever cross over to the other side frequently you'd realize that straight men and gay men in general act very different, interpret the world differently. You can argue on here all day long but your words have no weight on those who truly experience differences and pay attention to the world they live.

You clearly don't know me and I'm the opposite of living in a bubble and likely know far more people than you. If you're born in 78 like your name suggests, you should know better. I'm close in age. If you too are putting all gays in a Grindr category you have a very limited view of gay men or really just think there is 1 type. You can be straight and have all the stereotypical characteristics of a gay man but just happen to be attracted to women, and vice versa. OP and you try to limit all of us to your experiences with your app gays. But I digress.. I don't usually argue with unknowns online and especially not on a porn sight. I'm happily married with a very diverse group of friends in every sense, so I'm glad I'm not having any of these problems.

 

[jacoams]

The sexual preference (being gay, straight or anything else) does not define the personality of a person nor has nothing to do with gender identification.
It is a short sight and mistake (often reflecting inner unresolved issues or acceptance of one self) to categorize gay as a “type” of people. Every single individual is a person of its own. Labels will be your weakness and obstacle to fulfill yourself as a person.
Advise: embrace life to its fullest and experience more of the world, no regrets, no judgment, and meet more people.
Wish you the best and hope you find what you are looking for. Xx

 

[Bojangles78]

You clearly don't know me and I'm the opposite of living in a bubble and likely know far more people than you. If you're born in 78 like your name suggests, you should know better. I'm close in age. If you too are putting all gays in a Grindr category you have a very limited view of gay men or really just think there is 1 type. You can be straight and have all the stereotypical characteristics of a gay man but just happen to be attracted to women, and vice versa. OP and you try to limit all of us to your experiences with your app gays. But I digress.. I don't usually argue with unknowns online and especially not on a porn sight. I'm happily married with a very diverse group of friends in every sense, so I'm glad I'm not having any of these problems.

I guess anybody can say anything on the internet, there is no real way to verify if what you say about yourself is true. It's funny when someone makes an immature comment like I have more friends than you without knowing me or anybody else on here....people only say that when they are lashing out at someone and want to seem superior. This kind of response just goes against your point about gay people and stereotypes. You say you don't live in a bubble doesn't equate to how you respond......just an observation, no need to be upset unless I hit a sore spot. Anyway you and other people seem to have a problem with people who prefer chocolate ice cream simply because you prefer strawberry. It's not saying one is better than the other , it simply a preference based on observation and experience. If your experience with the gay culture and dating etc is good than good for you, but what is weird is you try to tell everyone this through passive aggressiveness, which really makes people like me think you are trying to sell everyone on the same pyramid scheme you bought into......maybe you aren't as happy and content as you want the world to think you are.