Interracial Relationships
- Thread starter Apolo1998
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It seems on this site if you're sexually attracted to members of another race you're racist, and if you don't, you're also a racist. Like a racial "Catch 22". You'd think by now interracial sex would be a big yawn and noncontroversial. Frankly, who cares what color other persons' bed partners are?
I go along with the great British actress, Mrs. Patrick Campbell, the first Eliza Doolittle in George Bernard Shaw's "Pygmalion" (the inspiration for "My Fair Lady"), who famously said she didn't care what "affectionate people do — so long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses!"
I go along with the great British actress, Mrs. Patrick Campbell, the first Eliza Doolittle in George Bernard Shaw's "Pygmalion" (the inspiration for "My Fair Lady"), who famously said she didn't care what "affectionate people do — so long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses!"
Its never just the attraction it's the motivations behind them and the consequences that result from them. I'd be very interested in hearing benign reasons for attraction to a specific race that isnt fetishism, or specific non attractions not based upon prejudice
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No it's not racist. Each of us has our own convictions of what we find attractive in another person.
Don't let anyone try to make you feel otherwise. You do you. You know what you find attractive in someone else. You don't have to explain to anyone why you feel this way.
Some people are pricks and would find fault with any thing you have said. Screw em they aren't living your life, you are. Only you can determine what is best for you. And you don't owe anyone an explanation.
It seems that just because you have an attraction to a certain race isn't any different than having a preference for say a skinny woman or an athletic man or big tits or whatever other physical attributes turn one on. If one happens to like only Asian women so what? Its just one persons preference. I once met a black girl at a lifestyle party and she was hot. She absoloutely would not have sex with me. Reason.."I don't do white boys". Was that racist..I didn't take it that way. Just her preference.
So go ahead and describe the common attributes of Asian women that would qualify such a preference and Ill offer examples of an Asian women that dont fulfill those attributes and ask you to say the same.
We went over the reasons why a minority especially in America would be reluctant to date or have sex with a white person, completely removed from any racist sentiment, and often despite an underlying attraction that already exists.
To have a preference for a physical feature is an objective thing. To have a preference for a race (or aversion to) is just as objective, but I think some people become self aware when asked about it and it gets muddled in subjectivity.
longstroke7
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No one is racist for being attracted to other ethnicities. It's when people fetishize other people because of their ethnicity or race...that's racist as fuck.
Its not about owing anybody anything, if anything it's about encouraging people to live in their truth. It attracts to you the like minded, and filters out the detractors, which no matter what anybody's preferences are, makes for much healthier hook ups and relationships. OP may not owe anybody here an explanation for his preferences, but fleshing them out may prevent some awkward hypothetical encounter in the future wherein he does owe an explanation to say, the chance middle eastern guy that happens to speak Spanish that he assumed was mestizo or perhaps a fairer skinned differently featured "mulato", etc...
Maybe OP discovers his preferences have more to do with specific skin tones and acclamation to his culture than a specific racial subgroup and then his opportunities increase. Introspection is rarely a bad thing and I think a "why " question to a racial preference is a prime opportunity for introspection
Maybe OP discovers his preferences have more to do with specific skin tones and acclamation to his culture than a specific racial subgroup and then his opportunities increase. Introspection is rarely a bad thing and I think a "why " question to a racial preference is a prime opportunity for introspection
longstroke7
Mythical Member
It's a fucking shitty thing for her to say though, regardless of her preferences.
Really? Maybe i come from a different context, but i hear that differently. It came off as less of a "white guys aren't attractive" vibe and more of " a you're attractive but I can't" sentiment which again references back to the earlier reasons i gave why a minority would be reluctant to sleep with or date a white person in the West, US especially.
longstroke7
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If a white woman said the opposite of that to me (a Black man), I would think "wow, she's pretty racist".
Her invoking your race is what's fucked up to me, not that she wasn't interested in fucking you.
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Except that he ask a specific question and made a racist statement at the end. If he didn't want to hear opinions he wouldn't have asked. I don't care who he wants to date that doesn't matter it's when you start saying things like people should stay with their own or that interracial relationships don't last. I don't care how he feels when you make stupid statements you deserve to get reposnes that make you feel bad. If he can't handle it don't ask dumb questions.
Ive heard that too many times and been lusted after too many times for me to run to racism as the culprit in that sense...typically its just innocent ignorance remedied by dialogue and exposure.
But as a black man(with a white wife mind you)... I also acknowledge a plethora of racially specific reasons why a black person would not date /fuck a white person that aren't really fucked up at all, actually quite understandable.
I get the urge to go to the opposite situation to justify or decry the logic, but depending on where this interaction takes place, it exists as a construct of a dog barking at the moon, or the moon barking at a dog.
I don't call them "stupid" responses, they're honest, they cut through the nebulous bullshit of subjectively perceived physical qualities attributed to a race, and get down to the real foundations these supposed preferences are built upon. So where we could've been bogged down in understanding the racial intricacies of the Latin world and how they express themselves within whatever subgroups, a question of interracial relationships is really exposed as a diatribe on the supposed inherent cultural (or behavioral) differences that prevent interracial harmony...
I don’t have a preference (as you can see by my gallery). To tell you the truth i haven’t had much of an opportunity to date Asian women so it has not been by choice not to date them. But preferences are just that: preferences and that’s not necessarily racist.
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The original poster of this thread shamed me indirectly for being biracial.
I don't mind him being shamed for being discriminatory. Not one bit.
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- Mule,
Sometimes people need others to put a check on their behaviour. If I say something that is dehumanizing to a group of people (such as "stick to your own kind"), I want someone to speak up about it, even if that is embarrassing to me. Why? Because I accept that I make mistakes and sometimes need help recognizing those mistakes. It helps me become a better person.
Those that cry out that they are being shamed for saying something demeaning based on identity? They are frequently people that are used to social privilege, therefore they often lack humility: Being called out makes them insecure and their defense is to attack the person checking them. The alternative – which doesn't occur to toxic people – is being a mature, thoughtful adult who pauses and reflects on whether they may have some learning to do.
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Yes. And its not about me feeling good it's about them feeling bad especially if they are racist. I have no simpathy for any person that is racist.
Shaming more often than not is just an illumination of an undesirable truth...whether or not somebody feels bad as a result of it is just a projection of their willingness to accept that truth.
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